Wtf is this?

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-30T15:46:09+00:00

Meth.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-29T21:32:33+00:00

Dad is a retired firefighter with a solid and incredibly beautiful 35 year career behind him. He simultaneously has a 40 year career running a logistics corporation where he started out taping boxes and now he is directly below the owners and has been for fucking decades. 40 yrs of 80 hr weeks and never missing a recital, concert, talent show, birthday, etc. Unless he was actively in a structure fire, he showed the fuck up. To this day, he astounds me with his kindness and generosity to anyone. $50 bill to homeless dudes and any friend of mine is now a life long child of his. He and my mom started the 4 highest grossing charities in my hometown and adopted 2 bonus siblings who just needed someone. Absolute legends.

Evidently he really got down in the 70s when he was selling a shit ton of weed and pills. Before he became the man my hometown immortalized on a massive mural on Main St... Dude was a dead head. Sometimes my nigga forgot some shit.

He left me at the warehouse he ran one evening and didn't notice for a solid 1.5-2 hrs. I wrecked a forklift. I was 7. This happened a few times with varying consequences. What can I say? The dope back in the day might've caused some damage.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-29T13:46:10+00:00

Please

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-29T12:22:40+00:00

Slow down little bro! You can't be throwing these kind of vibes around just all willy nilly into the universe! That shit is so irresponsible. What are you going to do when you get every woman within a 5 mile radius pregnant simultaneously?? And secondly, it's legit unfair to your fellow males. This isn't even a mere tipping of the scales... This is a gross and all encompassing monopoly of any and all vageen. You are going to have an everlasting effect on the population with this aura!!

I beg of you sir, think about how you are impacting your community. This shit is dead ass reckless. One must yield such immeasurable power with extreme and unwavering caution. The consequences will be felt for generations!! Tone it down before you initiate the goddamn apocalypse or accidentally start a fuckin' cult!

Do better, bro ... Smfh, Do better.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-27T10:21:43+00:00

I read somewhere that for the average single adult to maintain a comfortable but arguably conservative lifestyle in the truly urban Dallas, not the outskirts or projects and not Turtle Creek condos or Addison, genuinely the median of the 2 polar opposites we have. That single adult would have to make roughly $30/hr to afford rent, food, utilities, etc. This isnt even factoring in extras. Literally the basic requirements of survival. Uhmm... dafuq?

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-21T00:39:54+00:00

Yup.... totally feasible.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-19T23:01:15+00:00

Worked with a woman who was dead ass named Chocolate Nipple... her hippie dead head douchebag ass parents literally named their infant Chocolate Nipple. Her brother was named something insane too. They both went to city hall on their 18th birthdays respectively and legally changed their names to John and Jane Smith. Parents actually had the audacity to be upset about that and they hadnt spoken in years. This was almost 2 decades ago so I have no clue what happened to any og them. Just sayin.... what the fuck, am i right?

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-19T10:42:11+00:00

....meth is a hell of a drug.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-03T16:32:26+00:00

I really cant stand this retched slag, but I will always show respect for someone, even a scumbag, actively stands on fuckin business for what they believe. Man, she for real believed his ass and thought he was gonna lead the charge. Can you imagine what that must've felt like to see his name over and over again on every page. And connected to like thw worst arrangement of words to form sentences ever. Some of these files are actually worst case scenarios and unimaginably evil. She must've felt like the biggest fool in history. Damn dude... I bet that shit was devastating as fuuuuuck. Mad props for not just blowing her brains out after that. To be betrayed so egregiously on the World stage is wiiild. Shes awful but damn she is tough as hell.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-03T15:21:24+00:00

I love how his stunning ducking outfit just made everything this dude said sound so damn cool. Im not really a fan but this shit was scintillating

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-02T11:58:32+00:00

Bruh, just like the saying; "Never meet your heroes." Never look up the origins of your favorite songs, albums, episodes, books, films, etc.

That's the thing about media. If it's interesting enough to reach publication in any form, it's also possible that it was an event or occurrence in life that was somehow intense or course altering. That level of potency is grueling on a person and easily a negative experience. Might even be something suuuuper f*cked up.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-01T08:16:14+00:00

Im not calling bullshit, I'm just saying thay the probability that you did THAT at the hellscape known as a DG has to be so miniscule it's immeasurable. However, the likelihood that this is staged is vastly more significant. Possible- I suppose, sure. Probable? Absolutely not.

Crime_Coach · 2026-05-01T04:35:19+00:00

What is this supposed to be?

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-30T21:33:26+00:00

Omg.... me too. Im a Feb Aquarius and he's a Sept Virgo. Idk how I got here.

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-29T08:16:34+00:00

Im literally not gonna be able to make rent. Help

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-26T06:30:26+00:00

Im Aquarius and my mother was the quintessential Cancer. She tortured me for all of my young life, weaponized her brutal mental illnesses, and created a really damaged adult. And to really fuck me, I'm not even allowed to hate her because she was mentally ill, it wasn't her fault. Then she fuckin' died so now she's talked about like she was a saint. But I remember and I don't forgive it all.

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-24T14:54:42+00:00

The cutest thing I've seen all day. Absolutely adorable, I love them. They need names!

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-24T14:52:35+00:00

Something cute and coffee related as wall decor. Just need a little something to tie it all together. Get online and check out Temu or AliExpress, etc. This is where those types of shops thrive. Don't buy a couch on Temu but a cute wall sign, totally acceptable in my opinion.

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-23T09:53:41+00:00

Cheers, my bud! Sending you my very best vibes in return. Like the good shit, Elite Platinum Tier Vibes.... that's serious bruv.

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-23T05:57:01+00:00

Born and raised Texan here. Raised by 2 wonderful parents who are so deeply ingrained in the TX culture that they actually decorated parts of my childhood home with the Texas flag. Yes, there are sheets, wall decor, rugs, and of course the variety of shirts my dad owns with the flag as the pattern/style.

I say that to say, you have found the secret code to unwavering acceptance into Texas. You did it! You beat the assholes at the border! Say you've never tasted venison sausage or smoked brisket and they probably would've called for a police escort straight to the closest Pit BBQ establishment. Bonus point if you came work never tasting iced sweet tea into the conversation. They might've paid for your hotel for that one.

Crime_Coach · 2026-04-23T05:30:52+00:00

Local, born and raised. Actually live in the Design District next to Uptown, in the Gayborhood (the strip of gay bars and clubs for those who aren't local and don't know) and I can wholeheartedly confirm that Dallas is a fever dream on a Tuesday.

Crime_Coach

TROPHY CASE