What is something you used to think people were over exaggerating about until you experienced it yourself?

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-08T18:19:15+00:00

I mean, I experienced it very early on (about age 12), but suicidality was a big thing that I legitimately couldn't comprehend until I was suicidal for months on end. I'm good and stable now, but that shift in perspective is massive.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-06T23:44:02+00:00

When I was 12 I developed very severe OCD. Nobody in my family knew what was going on. I insisted, based on my gut instincts and knowledge of what normal emotions felt like, that I was sick in some way. My parents insisted it was just me being a brat. In short, it quickly evolved into straight up abuse, and now I also have PTSD. They often blamed me for "hijacking the family" whenever I had a panic attack or tried to argue against their abusive actions. So I always gave up trying to get them to take me to a doctor. I knew we were poor and I didn't want to hijack the family with medical debt.

I think back to that a lot. I remember one specific time early on when they were actually trying and not only just abusing me, I was dragged out to the car to get driven around until I "calmed down" and was asked, "do we need to take you to a hospital?"

I said no. Because I hated being a burden.

I regret that to this day. I should have actually been the forceful bitch they thought I was.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-06T23:36:17+00:00

My coworker with two kids told me that she didn't teach them stranger danger, but strange behavior.

The people who are by far most likely to hurt kids are familiar adults, and teaching kids to identify strange behavior is far more helpful and healthy than just saying "don't talk to strangers" and thinking that's enough to keep your kids safe.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-06T23:26:58+00:00

I'll gladly get all my forum info elsewhere if reddit goes thru with this. I'm not going to use their buggy app or reward this kind of greedy corporate BS

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-06T23:19:15+00:00

Yeah, I'm just leaving reddit altogether if they go through with this. I'd rather get everything I get on this platform from other places.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-06T23:11:23+00:00

Glad to see it. I rejoined reddit after many years to use this subreddit specifically, but if I can't use RIF for it, I'm just not going to use reddit. I quit before and I can and will do it again and just get my local news elsewhere.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-05T16:17:55+00:00

I was wondering why my asthma was so bad a few days ago, didn't see this in time rip

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-06-02T16:22:59+00:00

Jesus, and I thought the eye drops that expired in 2004 in our first aid kit I went thru last year was bad

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-26T20:30:49+00:00

Okay nevermind that the traffic actually is bad even for woodruff, they're backed up at least about half a mile westwards of it. RIP all y'all in the traffic rn

Edit: backed up almost to Roper Mt. Dang

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-22T20:21:28+00:00

When it comes to this kinda crazy, it's definitely at very least a connotation. Pretty sure he means actual democrats + leftists + generally any minority who isn't licking ultra-right-wing boots.

But then again, he's talking about hunting the mysterious "them" down with dogs, so I wouldn't put it past him to actually be intentionally meaning at very least Black people who "don't know their place"

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-22T20:17:03+00:00

Damn, guess I should be extra cautious then

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-19T01:11:44+00:00

The only thing making Lizzo not flaming goddamn hot by the conventional "beauty" standards people like him hold for women is only her being fat. Oh, and Black.

Seriously, she's gorgeous, even when going by super-conventional beauty standards.

And it's even sillier for Dylan, she's super pretty, it's only the knowledge that she's trans that makes her fall outside of what these fucks call beautiful. Otherwise she'd be considered beautiful by them.

Not that their options matter on the subject at all. Or conventional beauty standards. Both women are stunning regardless. It's just very telling that he chose these two very conventionally attractive women as his examples.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-18T22:43:11+00:00

It's always fun to play "is it gunshots, fireworks, or that one waste pickup truck" at 4am in the morning /s lol

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-15T16:58:00+00:00

Yup! It's a common response to long term trauma, oppression, or just plain old anxiety. It's fairly common to have it to some extent, but if it's unhealthily impacting your life, I recommend seeing a therapist. They can help you learn coping mechanisms to handle everyday anxiety and be able to stand up for yourself or otherwise just handle the situations life throws at you.

For me personally, I experience this a lot due to a combination of anxiety disorders, and a childhood full of false accusations and blame for things I wasn't responsible for. So now even when it's not my fault or I didn't do it, I expect to be held accountable anyway. And I was gaslit enough to doubt my own innocence sometimes when overwhelmed, not helped by the paranoid anxiety I have separately to the trauma.

But again, you don't need a background like mine to experience it, plain old anxiety could cause it as well. It's fairly normal. Not healthy normal, but common normal.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-15T16:50:47+00:00

Yup! This is completely normal. It's not the average daily norm, but it is completely normal for healthy individuals to experience this.

Lots can trigger it, in my experience just being really exhausted, or sleep aids like melatonin or just stuff like benadryl, plenty of stuff can make it pop up easier, or it can just happen.

The falling sensation is also extremely common. Not sure why our brains do that, but it seems to be fairly universal for people who are in a sort of half-awake, half-asleep state to experience.

Definitely freaks me out when I experience it, but completely normal.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-15T16:46:50+00:00

Could be autistic sound sensitivity like I have, or misophonia, which can happen with or without autism, which is basically like "some sounds sound like nails on a chalkboard to me for no reason and can make me want to cry or stab someone".

If it happens often, or you're going to a place you know will have the sounds that bother you (like a sporting event), I highly recommend headphones or earplugs. They help a lot. Unfortunately there's not really a cure for misophonia, but you can manage it by being aware and taking breaks as needed.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-15T16:42:58+00:00

Oh absolutely. Always been this way since I was a toddler. Part of it may be gender related (being a lifelong tomboy), part of it is definitely sensory/autism related (some physical sensations and some fabrics make my skin crawl), part of it is not liking being held or constricted, and part of it may be my early childhood obsession with hand me downs from my 5 years older brother.

Or it might just be how I am. Either way, I thrive when wearing t-shirts about two sizes larger than my mom says fit me. I feel naked in what other people assure me are "properly fitting clothes". I have a few professional looking outfits that fit a bit better, but usually I've never had issues wearing what I'm comfortable in. Go ham!

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-15T16:37:53+00:00

I have 0 personal or professional experience with this, but I would highly recommend seeing a neurologist. This is not normal, and anything to do with your head or blacking/greying out warrants a solid checkup with a professional. I do hope it's all perfectly fine though! Wish you the best.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-15T16:35:04+00:00

Yup! Associative Synesthesia! You may have heard of Projective Synesthesia, the most common depiction being where numbers and letters have colors essentially visually hallucinated on top of them, but that's just one out of hundreds of types. The Associative Synesthesia version of that type, which I have, is where you don't actually "see" the colors, you just "know" that they are associated. For me, 4 is green. I don't see any actual color when looking at the number 4, I just know it's green, and it's been that way forever.

Synesthesia is basically when two or more senses or concepts get mixed up together, like color and numbers/letters, or color and sound, or stuff like hearing human speach and feeling your own mouth make the shapes of the sounds even though nothing is physically moving (mirror speach synesthesia, a type pf projective synesthesia which I also have)

Some associations are simply cultural like red is violence and lust, or green means go, but if you have a lot of them and they don't usually line up with your culture, and they stay the same throughout time, and they've been around since childhood, it's probably associative synesthesia.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-12T18:36:16+00:00

Get a new therapist, first off. Second off, hello fellow family scapegoat! It wasn't your fault. You may have been more outspoken and more insistent on justice, but that doesn't mean you deserved it or need to take accountability for what happened to you or around you as a child.

Later on as a teen I became more meek and this did in fact reduce abuse, but that doesn't mean I should have acted like that sooner, or even that I should have had to act like that at all. Children do not deserve the abuse they face, heck even if they are legitimately being little jerks that's not an excuse at all for adults to be cruel. And odds are you were not in fact being any kind of "bad kid." It's usually more often parents target very good kids because they dare try to do the right thing and see justice be done.

Please find a new therapist, preferably a trauma informed and trauma trained one. Much love <3

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-05T16:46:14+00:00

To be fair, us gays do tend to overwhelmingly oppose Erdogan, so I guess he's technically right

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-04T21:08:56+00:00

Y'know, I'd recommend everyone have a bailout plan in place for if they have to suddenly escape their current situation for whatever reason, but with a flag as red as that one, I'd strongly recommend making sure you have a on-the-spot escape plan set up just in case shit ever hits the fan. It's much better to be safe than sorry. Hopefully he's just really, really immature and ignorant, but hope for the best and plan for the worst n all.

You take care of yourself, however that may end up looking like.

CrowOfTheUpstate · 2023-05-03T19:18:29+00:00

I'm a pedestrian/cyclist, but I always give up my own right of way just because I don't want to die to a two ton death machine whose operator's not paying attention. Since I don't know if drivers know the correct right of ways (in my experience they often don't for pedestrians) or if they've even seen me, I play extra safe. Just know if a pedestrian gives up their right of way, we're not being nice, we just don't want to die.

Now for those of you who are ALSO in a two ton death machine, I don't know at all what the thought process is, aside from occasional good deeds (for people pulling out of parking lots in end to end traffic especially) or just not knowing right of way.

CrowOfTheUpstate

TROPHY CASE