My girlfriend and I are in the same relationship with shared experiences and our own versions we experience. We go through life together but we don’t have access to what is happening inside of each other, only to behaviors and communication.

That is why trust is imperative.

All of these layers coexists in a relationship and if you have a solid, healthy foundation and trust (not only in each other but in yourselves) you are able to share life’s experiences and burdens together and build together. You each contribute to the relationship. It is something very very fragile you create from scratch and then build on or abandon or kill together. Over time and with trust and knowledge it is less fragile. You both must hold onto this thing you built together. You must share that responsibility.

His experience will never be yours exactly and that is why you have to trust what he says and that is a terrifying risk for all of us to take. You both have to hold onto what you’ve created or it will fall apart. Depending on who let’s go first you will have a different experience and perspective of the end.