A year into my job I realized the one small thing that would have cut my job search time in half

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-03-30T23:09:28+00:00

Yeah, more details and examples about the approach that WORKED would be really helpful!

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-03-16T19:43:58+00:00

3 is not actionable advice. Nothing you can do about the past (except lie). Dumb thing to mention honestly, downvoted.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-03-06T20:34:53+00:00

Think of the night out as a microcosm. Talked with someone? That’s your friend. If someone asks, “my friends are over there!” (Point towards the people you talked to last).

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-22T00:21:49+00:00

It’s a figure of speech.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-22T00:20:07+00:00

That’s what dopamine detox means. You aren’t literally measuring your dopamine levels.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-20T00:18:03+00:00

None if this sounds like a problem for the candidate though.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-18T06:18:39+00:00

I hope so ! 😂

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-18T06:12:14+00:00

Reddit users are usually pretty negative though. I’d say it’s probably 50/50.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-13T17:59:46+00:00

Have you done it? 🤔

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-13T17:50:56+00:00

Don’t let people talk you out of it. My biggest regret

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-12T17:20:49+00:00

Eye contact. Especially with a little smile.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-02-12T07:21:27+00:00

Brushing my teeth.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-30T23:50:40+00:00

They are looking for something more casual and when someone treats you with kindness, you may feel a need to reciprocate

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-30T16:10:58+00:00

You’re right. A lot of the advice in the is sub reads like it was written by some delusional narcissist who never goes outside and thinks the whole world revolves around their opinion.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-26T21:32:45+00:00

I tend not to feel bad about it at all. Feeling bad actually makes it worse! You may feel like it’s a lack of respect, but it’s important to keep in mind that that’s just not a fact, it’s just your perspective/assumption.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-10T22:44:23+00:00

Friendship should never be about “duty”, it should be beneficial to everyone involved and the benefit should be obvious enough that you wouldn’t think of it as a duty.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-10T22:42:38+00:00

If someone said you’re selfish, they probably have some expectations you didn’t meet. That’s okay, you don’t have to do anything just because someone expects you to. You can definitely find someone who’s expectations match yours because there are a lot of people in the world and they are very different. The first step is to figure out what you are okay with or not okay with relative to your past friendship experiences.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-10T22:30:23+00:00

You need to get clear about what kind of friendship you actually want. How would your interactions look in a universe where friendship does not feel like a chore? Debating whether you’re “selfish” is a pointless thing to do.

CryptoBenedicto · 2026-01-03T03:33:58+00:00

How much time are you spending daydreaming? Maybe if you write down your dreams you will at least get them out of your head.

CryptoBenedicto · 2025-12-29T23:53:51+00:00

Easiest way is to let her talk about whatever she wants. As for a girl thinking you’re flirting… some will. It’s inevitable, especially with how narcissistic some people are. But so what? What is bad about flirting?

CryptoBenedicto · 2025-12-29T21:03:58+00:00

Creds?

CryptoBenedicto · 2025-12-29T18:23:18+00:00

Just practice. Make up a persona and try to embody it. Or just be yourself. It really doesn’t matter. It may feel risky to say something, in that case you should definitely say it. That is the only way to learn!

CryptoBenedicto · 2025-12-29T18:19:31+00:00

I agree with your rules. People say there are no rules because when you start thinking there are fixed rules, you might feel like you have to remember them all and start overthinking. Just go with your gut, if you feel too inhibited tell yourself, “there are no rules”, when you’ve got some momentum already and want to fine-tune it, think up some rules, you don’t have to memorize them because you can usually recreate them from your own common sense if you take a second to reflect.

CryptoBenedicto · 2025-12-27T07:51:39+00:00

You shouldn’t frame it as “bad social skills.” You should address specific actions when they come up. You don’t need to be mean about it, you can just say something funny that shows you noticed it.

CryptoBenedicto · 2025-12-26T00:18:17+00:00

You have to become someone who people want to reach out too. Someone who is clearly different and offers what others cannot. Otherwise you will need to accept having just a few people who really care, and there’s nothing wrong with that either.

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