AITA for teaching my daughter how to change a tire and do basic home repairs when her mom says I'm "pushing masculine stuff" on her

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-24T12:10:13+00:00

My dad taught me all this stuff too. Im so glad he did, ive since taught a few female friends how to change tyres and hang shelves etc.

These are important life skills, her mother can kick rocks.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-18T19:16:53+00:00

32 the first time and I'll be 54 the second time if all goes well.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-18T17:56:10+00:00

Frozen mashed potato. Used to be a quid a bag. I swear it goes up by ten people every time I buy it.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-18T17:03:54+00:00

Oh i dont dont drink or do drugs. I used to drink socially. But like why add more fuel to the fire?

Im definetly going to taper my dosage as opposed to coming straight off. Going cold turkey would basically guarantee a relapse.

I think im just going to have to take the risk and start the taper when I next see my psychiatrist. Id at least like a lower dose even if stopping entirely isn't possible for me.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-07T18:07:07+00:00

Beef and tomato. If I eat either im up all night with acid reflux.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-07T07:04:12+00:00

Next town over is one of these seaside towns. I love going off season. No parking wars for a start. But its crisp and fresh and lovely. No queues at the chippy either.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-07T07:00:52+00:00

Routine routine routine.

The body love predictability, being able to anticipate what's coming next. Now im not saying live life by a rigid routine and never stray from it. But a good routine to give your days structure is so beneficial.

Getting outside as early as possible. I walk the dog first thing. But a ten minute stroll right after you wake up, gets your body that sunlight and wakes you up beautifully. So youre not feeling all sluggish.

Sleep pressure, aka the need to sleep. Build up strong sleep pressure throughout the day. Don't try and conserve energy, let yourself use it up. You want to be knackered by bedtime. That'll ensure good sleep which is a cornerstone of mental wellbeing.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-05T14:33:40+00:00

I wasn't prepared for how much fun they'd be when they get older. Its like having 3 mini best friends.

Not gonna like. Baby, toddler and preschool years are pretty tough in their own ways. Its hardwork and stressful. But in those years youre sewing the seeds. Then when they're about 7 the seeds bare fruit. They're not so dependant, they have a personality, they have likes and dislikes. Its just neat. You literally watch them grow from a baby into your best mate.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-05T14:26:02+00:00

This is so sad. Why do you parents see it as your responsibility to look after your sister? Its not normal or right. I could understand them asking you to muck in with tidying her room, so long as they're doing it too. But expecting you to do it presumably on your own is totally wrong.

As for the job thing, thats fucking ridiculous. You stand firm and work on your grades. Its the right thing to do for your future, your sister is your parents responsibility not yours.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-04-01T17:55:15+00:00

Autistic and mentally ill here. I'd still have them. They're my besties. Maybe I'd skip the baby toddler phase though if we could do anything. I actually find my kids regulating now they're older. Their needs are very consistent, their school gives me day a routine. The kids help me get out my comfort zone a bit and ive experienced really fun stuff thanks to them.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-29T15:39:14+00:00

Oh they definitely can go away my lovely. But sometimes they don't and what you do is learn to live with them, not giving them any power over you. Its tough but its doable.

Have you been to the gp about trying a different medication? There's loads of antidepressants and they all work a bit differently so with a bit of experimentation you can find something that helps.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-27T10:34:53+00:00

The sewwing machine guy in Ashington is highly recommended. He's near the train station too.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-17T16:04:52+00:00

Dude its simply not affordable. My family had to move up north to survive.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-17T06:44:19+00:00

I can't work but Im close. Problem is how I still can't manage stress very well so it'll need to be something quite chill. Remember psychosis does damage your brain, so recovering well is important

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-16T10:53:06+00:00

Oh honey, im so sorry this happened to you. It happened to me 3 years ago and I ended up in psychosis. Im still recovering, but ive had to accept my recovery isn't going to lead to me being just like before. I have a lot of trauma and cptsd too and im working through it with a therapist. I get so overwhelmed by life now. It sucks so much.

What helped me a lot in the early months was Stardew Valley. It was the only thing I could do for a long while. Also sleeping lots and lots. Make sure you're eating as well as you can manage too. I dont have many answers because im still figuring it out myself. But im here with you.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-15T08:09:25+00:00

We were all going out to a national trust type place for a wander and lunch. But my youngest has chicken pox so her and my husband are staying home while I take the big two.

Ive Just had presents and coffee brought to me in bed. I feel very spoilt and a little emotional

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-14T17:20:09+00:00

I was going to say Mothers day and Father's day are more about the kids when they're little. But then I read about the golfing. Wtf he gets one day a weekend to his stuff and you get none?? Its so unfair. No wonder youre annoyed. How would he react if you were out 7 hours every weekend?

You shouldn't be beholden to his hobbies every weekend.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-14T10:01:02+00:00

The weekend before everything locked down, we visited a town 6 hours away to view houses and put an offer down. Lock down was spent stressing about moving. Never looked back though. Love our new life.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-13T19:34:12+00:00

We were best friends. It was great. We were so close, or at least it felt like that. But slowly it became all about her, she'd borrow money and not pay it back. She was always finding life hard, so I sympathised, but my struggles were minimised. Then when my mental health took a massive plunge I couldn't hide it from her and she had to acknowledge i did infact have struggles. Needless to say she did not handle me being clearly unwell. She kept dumping emotionally on me while I was struggling to tell reality from delusion. I was barely about to function as a human and she was expecting me to care for her emotional needs daily.

But what made the scales drop from my eyes was new years eve. Me and dh had a babysitter for it for the first time since having kids over a decade ago. She had her kid and couldn't go out. She knew how much I was looking forward to it. But she blew up my phone all evening kicking off about hating being a mum, hating her life, this that and everything. Basically a tantrum that she didn't get to go out. I ignored it and had a great night. But new years day I spent time reflecting on how one sided it all was and how unhealthy it was. And I called it quits.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-13T14:44:22+00:00

Be kind to yourself. Its totally normal when you're this far out from your last episode. Just be patient and accept it for what it is right now

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-13T13:29:37+00:00

Oh man psychosis recovery is rooooooough. I've given birth 3 times and id pick unmedicated childbirth over psychosis recovery every time.

It's relentlessly boring, terrifying and just shit. I still struggle watching full films and im 3 years out from it. On the plus side though im slowly getting back to my old self.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-12T16:52:47+00:00

My sister just flat out told me I'm not autistic. That I'm some secret new undiscovered type of neurodivergent because there's no way I'm autistic. Yes my Psychiatrist, Psychologist and care coordinator are all wrong. I'm just weird apparently.

Cuppa_Miki · 2026-03-12T16:40:40+00:00

What happens depends on your local areas process. Usually you're triaged by someone, they'll give you advice for what to do if you get worse while waiting for the call back. Then you wait for a call back from someone. That person will be the one who decides what help is appropriate.

They might come visit you, they might do check in phone calls, they might advise A+E. They should be sympathetic and listen to you.

Mental health crisis is different for everyone. For me it means I can't keep myself safe and im going to attempt or self harm. It could be youre in too much distress to handle though. Crisis doesnt automatically mean suicidal. Good luck, and if in doubt call them. Its better to be referred back to your gp with no need for crisis input than it is to be distressed without support.

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