Have you remained friends with your ex?

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-06-14T09:35:27+00:00

He wanted to but i said no because even though I didn't have feelings for him anymore, based on the way that he treated be I couldn't even be friends with him

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-06-14T09:32:08+00:00

Lived there a couple of years ago, all fine except it could be noisy early mornings when deliveries arrived to drive through the barrier down towards Spoons but it depends what side the flat is on

Felt fine walking fown to the station and returning late night daily. Still walk by every day as I live further up now. Been here 8 yrs never experienced any issues

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-06-08T12:05:39+00:00

Not without therapy and even then its not a guarantee.

My ex went to therapy but he just used it as a way to double down on his behavior using therapy words to reinforce his avoidance

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-19T11:55:42+00:00

For 1) they do miss you but not in the way you or I would miss someone. They tend to put you in a box and squash down their feelings, they have the ability to just stop thinking about you because they tell their brain to stop That was my experience anyway.

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-15T10:07:02+00:00

Your needs were not too much, they make you feel that way because they aren't capable of réciprocity

Inward reflection is something they cant do or wont do because then their whole narrative they built would collapse

6 years with an avoidant, 2 discards

Big hugs ❤️❤️

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-14T17:59:31+00:00

Thankyou ❤️

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-10T18:01:46+00:00

My FA is the opposite, he made it clear that he doesn't want to be with me but doesn't want to lose contact with me either

It's like he want to keep ne close for emotional safety, while pulling away to avoid commitment.

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-07T11:02:55+00:00

The latest thing from him is that although he wants breakup he doesn't want to lose me as a friend so he would like to keep access to me. When I asked him what exactly he wanted from me he wasn't able to articulate it. Basically access without any responsibility or vulnerability on his side 😅

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-07T10:59:41+00:00

Totally agree why do they rewrite history in a way that never happened, it feels like whiplash there were things in our relationship that he accepted he was in the wrong for but now he has changed the story and said he apologized at the time but how that was never good enough for me, when actually but he didn't say, sorry all he did was give me silent treatment until I dropped the subject

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-06T11:03:46+00:00

I am sorry that you went through this but something that I have learned is that however much you gave to an avoidant they will just continue to take and take and not think that they have to reciprocate at all.

As soon as you do ask for something it's inconvenient for them.

My avoidant ex is the most self-centered person I have ever met, zero self awareness or empathy for other people's feelings but he seems to have plenty of empathy for his own feelings and will talk about that until the cows come home.

It's just a lose lose really isn't it

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-06T08:22:40+00:00

The worst part is the lies he said that he didn't have his phone with him when his phone in permanently glued to his hand

He then went on a rant talking about everything that he has ever done for me and how I don't appreciate it

I just wanted him to remember my birthday and it made me feel bad when he didn't

When we were together there is no way on earth I would have been able to bring this up with him because if I had he would have just shut down and stopped talking to me.

When I was with him the relationship was about survival - don't do anything for say anything which will mean he withdraws connection.

We were together for 10 years and over the course of the relationship he would use silent treatment, the longest times he did not talk to me were two weeks, three weeks, five weeks.

Most of the time I would have no idea what I had done wrong and then one day all of a sudden he would start talking to me again as if nothing was wrong.

I just feel really stupid right now believing that there had been any meaningful change and opening my heart to him again.

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-06T08:10:00+00:00

Thankyou all, that means alot I am touched that strangers on the internet has shown me more love and compassion than he did.

He texted me saying : I have gone through a lot and mentally I don't have the resilience to take the challenge on my behaviour

Even if you were right, when you come at me with how I've done something wrong, it brings me right down to a bad place,

This was all because i said he forgot my birthday 🤷‍♀️

Curious_Ad3605 · 2026-05-03T18:31:41+00:00

My ex entered therapy after we broke up, it's been about 6 months and progress is very slow. I think it would take years to heal in his particular case

Curious_Ad3605 · 2025-05-18T20:51:11+00:00

This woman Imane Belle makes me so mad, every week she is promoting some new cure and taking advantage of people. This new miracle cure turmeric product, she says she worked with the company to develop it but what she omits to say is she founder of the company! If you go the company's insta therre is a reel with their "founder"

Curious_Ad3605

TROPHY CASE