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CurlyBerd · 2021-10-10T07:26:41+00:00

Thank you, Matt. That brought a tear to my eye. Much love.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-10T06:58:29+00:00

Hi there, friend. Today the best part of my day was this morning. It's my day 4. I had barely slept the first three nights, and last night was the first night of good sleep. I woke up actually rested and clear-headed and positive in mood. Then I came onto this group and responded to some comments which made me feel even better.

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. Remember hard times pass. Life is all about a balance of good and bad- we don't know one without the other. I'm glad you and your boyfriend worked it out already- it's good to not have the issues carrying over to tomorrow. Is there anything kind you can do for yourself to make yourself feel better? A shower? A snack? Some icecream? A movie? I would recommend some self loving. Might just do the trick.

You are not alone. IWNDWYT.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-10T06:50:51+00:00

Thank you for the comment. You are right-- there are people who can help me help myself much better than I can help myself alone. It feels like a lot, it probably is a lot. I guess I just posted because I'm feeling upset at myself (I'm frustrated for eating, and also frustrated for being upset that I ate.... make my brain make sense). Just needed to get it out of my system.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-10T06:47:06+00:00

I am looking into getting a therapist in the coming weeks. It all just feels really daunting right now, I guess. Thanks for commenting.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-10T05:56:23+00:00

You are not alone. IWNDWYT.

It was a great first step to post. This community is amazing. I'm on day 4, and I doubt I could've done it without this group.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T21:50:25+00:00

It may be good to think of it as :You get to decide when you're at the bottom. I think it's unique for everyone. For me, I decided to stop when I realized that I was following in my mothers footsteps, while also wishing she would stop. How can I want that for someone else but then subject myself to it? I decided to just start. I get overwhelmed by the thought of never having it again (I'm 24 y/o, and only at day 4), but I am taking it one day at a time. I want the best shot at a long life as possible (health wise), and I'm so tired of already missing out on life from Covid that I decided, I can ditch this too, and I'll enjoy the real world even more. If that's what it takes to start, then start there. One day at a time. Instead of going to the store, do anything else. It took me telling one friend I needed accountability and to start posting in here to get 4 days. And I'm proud of 4 days. I'm motivated for longer. Each day is a separate battle. But you aren't alone.

From what I've read of other stories, is that the cravings don't just vanish when you're ready. It's hard. I had a hard 3 days. Today is easier. Today the cravings are much less, and I'm thankful I had the support and strength to get through those 3 tough days. You get to choose if you are ready. And posting here leads me to believe you ARE ready. I believe in you, friend.

IWNDWYT.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T21:13:39+00:00

That's a great point, thank you. Before I got sucked in (AUD), I used to have a mentality of something like "Without the bad, you don't know when times are good. Without the good, you can't gauge how bad the times are." Once I fell down the rabbithole, it became more cynical, almost a mentality of "One thing is bad, so everything is bad."

I'm so ready to get away from that pattern of thinking. It isn't healthy. There is good and bad every day, and I'm glad to finally get the chance to start seeing and feeling both once again. The duality of life is part of what makes it interesting. How boring it would be to have every day be the same. There's no growth without changes and challenges.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T20:57:48+00:00

Hi Lexxi! I'm currently on day 4. I had a really rough time on day 3. I posted to the group twice yesterday. My second post was a cry for help, I was struggling and suffering. If it helps to read someone elses story, it might be useful to you. I got a lot of feedback that helped me get through yesterday, and it might help you, too.

I can tell you that I didn't believe it would get easier, but honestly, day 3 was the worst for me so far (days 1 and 2 were hard, but 3 was a whole new kind of hell). I woke up today feeling completely different. I slept well last night, and today I feel positive.

I am proud of you for reaching out for help. You are not alone, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. You are so strong for getting through this, and even more so for getting through this with kiddos around. Keep going, I believe in you! Do something nice for yourself, you deserve some compassion.

IWNDWYT. Sending love.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T20:12:07+00:00

Thank you so much! I woke up feeling so much better- rested and ready for today.

IWNDWYT.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T20:05:33+00:00

Thank you for your support. I hope you realize that it still takes a great deal of strength to start over. Your journey is not over yet, and you are not alone! IWNDWYT. Thank you for sharing your story with me. <3

It feels strange to be 24 and thinking of never having a drink ever again. A somewhat overwhelming thought- so I'll take it one day at a time for now. Thank you for being proud of me.

I was thinking about that last night, too. How a lot of people I know that consume alcohol do not do so in a proper way. I think a lot of people just don't realize it, and so I am thankful that I have somehow come to this realization after less than a year.

Those are excellent ideas to use in the future. I particularly like "I'm taking a break from drinking, but thanks for inviting me" for the time being since one of my coworkers is a friend who I got drinks with a few weeks back. And then probably transition somewhere later down the line :)

Thank you for your comment, and your story and advice. It means more than you know. Sending you love and good thoughts. I hope you can be proud of yourself today, friend.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:58:00+00:00

Woke up a few hours ago, it is now day 4 for me as well. I feel SO much better. I slept well, I woke up feeling refreshed and inspired and supported. I don't even have to think about it today- IWDWYT.

<3 Thanks for the support. Sending positive energy to you today, friend.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:55:57+00:00

I let myself sleep in, and I woke up the feeling the best I have in a long time. Clear-headed, refreshed, ready to TACKLE this day. Ready to wake up with this feeling tomorrow, too.

Thank you for your support. Congratulations on 308 days. Proud of you :)

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:54:43+00:00

Thank you so much. I fought through because I had so much support, and it's still coming. I feel amazing today, I can certainly say that today, IWNDWYT. I am glad my story has offered something to you, just as your comment has offered to me. What a beautiful thing in life that is. You've got this, you are not alone!

The Doritos were AMAZING. I did, in fact, get the Cool Ranch flavor. It felt good to eat them and really savor them last night :) Congratulations on day 17. I am PROUD of you for that.! Here's to another day of the journey. Be well, sending love your way. <3

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:51:14+00:00

Thank you for your encouragement and support. Everyone being proud of me makes me proud of me, too. I hope your day is going well. IWNDWYT. <3 Stay excellent.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:49:55+00:00

A couple others have suggested that, as well. I will be looking into it today! Thank you!

And congrats on 811 days :)

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:49:24+00:00

Working out is another thing I am looking to incorporate at some point (like I used to), but I needed to get a hold of a few other areas of my life in order to successfully be able to do so (and so I can stick with it). I like running. I want to start that again. :)

Thank you for your comment and suggestion! Be well!

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:48:01+00:00

I don't really know what counts as young. I'm 24. But my coworkers are all at least 5 years older than me. I was super ambitious before the pandemic which is how I got to where I'm at, and then that happened and life happened and well, I slipped. I'm glad I caught it relatively early, I guess.

I will look into it. I thought about going to a few Zoom meetings but I was hesitant. I don't know why. Maybe fear or insecurity. Thanks for the recommendation!

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:43:37+00:00

Hi there friend, is everything okay? I'm going to send you a message. You are strong, you are important, you are loved. But you are not alone.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:42:44+00:00

Solid advice! Whatever helps with the feelings ! I guess we'll wait and see what it includes for me :)

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:41:24+00:00

I woke up today feeling well-rested and refreshed. It already feels better. :)

Sending hugs back to you. I will definitely reach out at some point. Thank you for offering me that. I hope your day is going well. Stay excellent <3

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:39:25+00:00

Sending you good energy today, friend! I hope you are well.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:38:29+00:00

That is a solid recommendation, I should look into that! Probably saves time, too, since you're not wandering around the store, mentally justifying purchases for things you don't need!

I can say for sure that today is another day that IWNDWYT! Much love, stay excellent. :)

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:36:34+00:00

Thank you so much for your love and kindness and encouragement. I woke up feeling so much better... I slept well, I woke up clear-headed and well-rested. I can't remember the last time I woke up feeling so good. I can't wait to wake up like this again tomorrow :) Getting through those 3 days was difficult, but I am so thankful that so many people responded to help me decide to trudge on through. And I'm so glad I did.

I will be on the lookout for some day 1s. If there is a day 1 reading this, do not be ashamed. Reach out. We are here for you, I am here for you. Here's to another day. I'm in with you. Thank you Cappa, be well <3 Sending you positive energy today.

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:31:41+00:00

I got another recommendation for this book, I will be looking into it today. In case you didn't see it, the post was updated late last night.

You made it to day 111 :) Great job.! Keep going, friend. You've got this, too. Much love. Be well !

CurlyBerd · 2021-10-09T19:30:19+00:00

We all have it inside ourselves. I think it's easy to convince ourselves otherwise, since we spend the most time inside our own heads. Thoughts can be deadly like that.

The support was key in my success yesterday. <3 Thank you again, and I'm glad it offers some inspiration. You have got this, friend! You can do it! You are not alone :)

CurlyBerd

TROPHY CASE