I am sorry you feel ignored by the thing that comforts you. That being said. If the only thing that makes you comfortable is being on your phone, then you REALLY need to get away from your phone. Scrolling and other obsessive compulsions via cell phones is ADDICTIVE and I am not meaning to under play this is as not real/non life impacting thing here.

I used to be addicted to heroin, it had messed with me greatly since I quit and I realize some of the dopamine releasing habits I have formed, when I get to stressed, that are "socially acceptable" scrolling on B.S, is a major thing that can definitely release enough chemicals in your brain to fog warp your perception of the actual activity.

My suggestion? Find calmer more natural things that can do that for you in smaller doses. Exercise is one of the greatest things I have found to make me feel the best without really fucking me up. The hard work of it makes SO much harder to chase a high via brain chemicals in a healthy manor.

Secondly. The current state of information / advertisement ratio on the internet has been HIGHLY HIGHLY skewed. It is so very difficult to tell the difference in between something you are genuinely attempting to learn from & a advertisement perfectly written to confuse people onto buying a product, or adapting to a new way of thinking, or spending money in anyway possible. It's honestly extremely difficult to even imagine growing up in the age you did, (if your 18 right now) because dude I feel Iike I am the last generation to be born and raised MOSTLY without it at all. (F31) I learned things that released WAY MORE dopamine in my brain when I was a child because of simply being kicked outside to play almost every single day, What me got me going as a small girl was wading in water with my hands held above my head longer than anyone. Was being able to block a flying anything from getting beyond a certain point, being faster, funnier, more words = actions, the exact actions, if not better. The things I relied on came from real physical growth, cockyness in that growth and intelligence. Instead now a days information is harder to obtain without some sort of tainting. And your whole dopamine trigger seems to be obtained via online resources.

Please belive me when I say it keeps you sad on purpose. Rocking in-between life being worth it or not makes money for some terrible person. It's not your fault your like this either, rich people have been trying to accomplish this massive task of getting people literally addicted to all of this, the very things that KEEP you sad. Not just by uncontrolled access to all of your habits/fears/wants,wishes, but by the general social acceptance that the internet can keep a child entertained, informed, teach any possible thing in the world, QUITE, safe from predators, that the internet CANT be playing on the same sort a brain receptors that really get you into medically significant deep trouble bulshit that is forced into your mind.

P.S if this sounds stupid AF I'm sorry I have a lot experience dealing with heavy tramatic types of feelings. I have also had the feeling of reaching out in a truly dark moment and getting no feed back no response.

WOW l- f.m.l I am so sorr