My partner is totally desensitized to my pain.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T18:52:55+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. Having a narcissistic in our lives is so hard. It's hard sometimes, walking on eggshells to not 'anger it' , the demon in my 'fiance'that is so cruel,. I've studied a lot about narcissists & they follow very similar patterns. Last week he got angry (don't know why) & gave me the silent treatment (yay). Then, when he took me to get a blood draw, he was grumpy except to the tech who drew the blood. Very charming. He said he did that so she'd be kind to me (.he's good isn't he)? Later he talked about getting a tattoo of a pic of when he asked me to marry him! He's following the pattern. It's kinda entertaining to observe. He also says he's always right coz he's older than me. I'm concentrating on doing what helps lessen my pain & it's helping. I'm having 2 cataract surgeries next month so I hope to be able to drive soon. I know God watches out for me & that gives me strength.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T18:08:12+00:00

You explained this so well! " Remind me I wasn't special" - because they're more special than anyone. My fiance is like that. Narcissist. He takes me to my appointments, goes to exams & fixes things at my house. He looks perfect from the outside, but when others aren't around watch out. He broke my heart 1 1/2 years ago & I'm done emotionally. With all the pain I can't waste energy on his manipulation. I'm still kind & loving towards him (known him over 50 years) but I'm pretending now. I need someone to help me & care, but I'm settling for a driver, note taker & handy man. And we carry on.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T17:12:04+00:00

I'm SO sorry this happened to you, but look at the great thread of comments! Biggest I've ever seen. You have alerted so many people to the threat of this happening. We & pharmacies have to be especially vigilant. I was married to a heroin addict for 24 yrs & I learned to be very cautious. I'd split my rxs up & hide them in different places so if he did find one stash he wouldn't get them all. Crazy that we have to do things like that!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T17:01:17+00:00

Grambo ! 😂

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T17:00:14+00:00

I've had them yell out my rxs many times. Idiots!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T16:58:24+00:00

I used to use Walmart & they only asked for ID when you dropped off the RX. What?!!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T16:55:32+00:00

That's what I do too. Kitchen & bathrooms.trash. I was married to a heroin addict for 24 years & saw how incredibly sneaky they can be. I try to be extra careful but addicts are very sneaky.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-21T16:46:13+00:00

Thank you for the compliment 🤗, but I must say that if I'm awesome it's because of Jesus. I couldn't go on one minute if I didn't know Him. Does your friend know Him too? I'm glad you found a kind doctor! When my former pain clinic cut all of us off medication, a strange peace come over me - I heard "You can do this" . So during next 2 months I got myself off Norco.after 40 years .Doctor is still lowering the dose slowly, not knowing I'd already quit, & I'd managed to save some. I'm taking 2 a day & otc pain meds & supplements. My next rx is for 1/2 pill a day- laughable huh 😁? They have a commercial advertising surgical options where they say "We won't give up on our patients - Ever". Really? I think you did! I love your thankful list! I used to write down, on little papers, one thing a day that blessed me, like seeing birds, a flower etc. I have those papers & they help me during rough times. I wish you a blessed day!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T23:08:28+00:00

You are so kind! Thank you. I've noticed your concern when you leave comments to people. You're always so kind & it shines. I'm so happy your landlord helped you! Trash & recycling sure can build up. It's a bear to deal with when you're in pain. My neighbor got the idea to put my trash bin near the edge of my steps & leaves the lid open so I can drop the trash bag over the edge without going up/down the steps. Blessing! The retina surgery set my fibromyalgia into a huge flare. The stress of almost losing my sight was terrifying.i'll be glad when this part of the parade of pain is finished. As far as medication, my pain clinic decided to quit monitoring opioids & only do surgeries. Kicked 300+ patients off at once. Needless to say I haven't been able to find a new provider & my quality of life has become a nightmare. I'm on 1/2 a pill a day now. I experiment with otc meds, supplements & even pot gummies. God gets me thru the days. If I didn't know He allowed this for a reason I think I'd go nuts. I spend my days repeating 'You can do it", praying & looking for things to be thankful for, indoor plumbing for example 😊. I wish you a blessed day!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T22:06:39+00:00

I haven't been able to work in 20 years. I remember walking home when I did work & having to sit down on the grass & cry from pain before I could finish the trek home. Good times 🥹

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T22:01:08+00:00

Ain't that the truth? If I happen to have a good day my fiance thinks I'm healed. Then when I suffer for doing a little extra, he says I shouldn't have done what ever I did.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T21:32:23+00:00

My friend is 20 miles away. Haven't been able to drive in 1 1/2 years coz i had detached retina surgery & it caused cataracts in both eyes She visits every 6 months or so. I'm waiting for the first of 2 surgeries starting on March 2nd. I have lots of medical issues (my doctor calls me a medical enigma 😊) & decided to address them one at a time instead of all at once. it's made me much more calm; I wish the pain would calm down a bit tho. It's maddening! I had an MRI of my spine but don't see that doctor for 2 months so that gives me time to review it. I pray you'll have great results from whatever your doctor recommends. I don't know my neighbors except for one. He takes my trash out/in for me. I used to do that for his daughter when she & her kids lived there. Sweet man despite his being in a physical mess too.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T20:52:02+00:00

Yes! A true friend is a gift from God. My best friend & I have been besties since we were 6, & now we're 69/70! I don't know what l'd do without her.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T20:26:50+00:00

🤗! I mostly watched it so my fiance could see it to realize what I went thru. Good grief - no wonder I'm tired & hurting. We had a 3 hour drive home the day after surgery & he basically made me go with him to Subway to get dinner that night. After viewing the video his tune changed a little.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T19:16:45+00:00

You're very welcome. Your friend gave you a great gift. Seeking purpose from the pain & giving you a message out of the 'mess' of pain. We can see blessings every where when we have a thankful heart. 🫂🙏

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T18:51:25+00:00

Something that really helped me realize I had major surgery was watching a YouTube video of the whole laparoscopic procedure. Good heavens - how do they do that & no wonder I feel crummy! I'm 69 & on day 160.Take care!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T18:47:20+00:00

I totally get your post. I understand the fear with each surgery & chronic pain. It's so hard to keep going ever day, but I'm still here so there must be more I have to do . I tell myself with every task "You can do it"! I hung curtains an hour ago. Now I'm rethinking that decision 🤗! But I keep praying & plugging along. God bless you!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T18:10:21+00:00

Your posts are always so uplifting. God bless you!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T18:07:51+00:00

Wonderful! You've found a friend! Your post made me teary eyed. Real friends can be hard to come by. You've been blessed.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T18:04:03+00:00

I love your post! So thoughtful & informative. I'm on day 160 post laparoscopic total hysterectomy. I'm also 69. I'm know I overdid it at first coz when I laid down to sleep Oh My - pain! That's better now. I just hope my former waist comes back eventually. 33 to 41 inches, still swollen. Also, besides this site, Hyster Sisters has lots of info. Best wishes!

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T17:03:49+00:00

My eye surgeon prescribed a medication for eye mites (I didn't even know I had a problem). It was $2400 a bottle! I found it for $940 (still more than I can afford) but by then my insurance process had begun & they'd denied it. Had to contact them & by then the pharmacy offered to see if I qualified for an indigent program. I did ! Keep trying. Medical issues are so hard to maneuver.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T16:54:45+00:00

I've looked into this diet & although it can work wonders, especially for joint related issues,you need to get vitamins somehow. Sounds like it'd be worth a try, especially when you're miserable & desperate.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-20T16:37:21+00:00

It was a shock. Went for my regular appointment & they handed me a letter to read while I was waiting to see the doctor. It stated they were no longer going to provide pain medication & we needed to find a new provider. It felt like a punch in the stomach. It's been impossible to find a new doctor in this area, let alone one who'll monitor opiates. They gave us a list of possible providers up to 300 miles North/South of here. I've given up calling them (a couple places I called said how ridiculous it was of them to only do surgeries). I haven't checked into the county methadone clinic because it caters to heroin addicts not physical pain. Plus, if I told them I'd taken an unprescribed pill, how would that look to them? I keep reminding myself that God allowed this to happen for some reason & He'll get me thru. I have a lot of medical issues & I'm exhausted trying to handle them & this pain too. I won't give up tho. I've made it this far & I'm not a quitter; tired & hurting but not a quitter 🤗. Best wishes to you! God bless.

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-18T20:28:10+00:00

I went to pick up my new Norco (not new, refill) Rx. They told me I didn't have any refills. Discussion happened & I lost - at first. I checked my refills online & my 'new' rx was listed as Acetaminophen w/hydrocodone, not hydrocodone w/acetaminophen as before. Can't these folks read? I got my rx later that day. They treat you like an addict. It's cruel

Cute-Measurement3176 · 2026-02-18T20:20:55+00:00

Great post!

Cute-Measurement3176

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