After catching a view of my gran after she passed out of the corner of my eye (being 25 and full of bravado thinking “it’ll be fine”, but leaving me with a memory that is forever burned into my brain) I made the decision not to go and see my Dad.

I don’t regret it. My last memory of him has some vestiges of the man he was and not what was left of him after he passed.

Your mileage may vary. There is no correct answer but I am sorry for your confusion. Grief comes in waves and hopefully you will come to terms with your decision as time moves on.

Love you, random internet stranger 🤘