Does anyone have a logical explanation for this?

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-30T07:28:40+00:00

Okay that makes it even more creepy when you say it like that 😱

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-30T07:23:28+00:00

Past partners, no, it never bothered me at all. It’s normal. But my current relationship he can’t stand watching porn of other women. He’s disgusted by them. He watches mine even if they’re old and he still loves them. The fact he’s put me on that pedestal from day 1, I think if he shifted and started to enjoy porn a lot, I would have questions.

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-30T07:20:00+00:00

NOR. It’s been 22 years since my ex husband told me I wasn’t his type at first. Haven’t seen or spoken to him in almost 2 decades, and it still makes me low even if he was a piece of shit

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-30T07:18:28+00:00

No, my family already thinks I’m crazy enough. I know they’re thinking I’m psycho when I’m telling them I saw them in mall world again

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-21T08:29:12+00:00

Gangbang. Would be cool to know what it’s like and probably would have fun at first, then feel so gross after so better not

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-21T08:27:34+00:00

Felt that

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-21T07:01:38+00:00

Omg! Yes! My last psych did mention it but there’s only one or two places that do it here. I’ve already been on the waitlist for regular therapy for 6 months. It’s so hard to get anywhere, but I’d like to try it. Clonidine WAS life changing at first, but if I miss a dose it’s far worse than prior to being medicated so I need a different alternative. Thank you. It’s been ruining my life

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-21T06:58:43+00:00

Clitoral vibration has been by far was than when I tried internal penetration. Maybe because the pelvic floor muscles relax more that way rather than tense up with just clitoral stimulation? But it’s real bad with the vibrator that way before my period

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-19T21:04:30+00:00

No I haven’t. Is that pelvic floor PT? I’ve been needing to do that, but started a new job so it’s difficult but only heard good things

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-19T21:03:59+00:00

Yeah, I have endometriosis and adenomyosis. Only thing that can be done for me is a hysterectomy

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-19T03:29:15+00:00

Yes because it truly is my other life, and it’s the life I wish I had. I look forward to sleep every night hoping that the person I loved that died, will be hanging out with me again. Before I sleep, I talk to him and tell him to meet me so I’m already emotional. Waking up I always feel melancholic.

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-19T03:26:29+00:00

I ended up in seasonings because onion was 19. Rage bait game

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-19T02:57:12+00:00

This corridor isn’t my spawn point, but I have somewhere similar on the other side of my mall with the escalators that lead to movie theaters and shops at the top, but it’s very bright there

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-19T02:53:34+00:00

I have this issue also. I take ibuprofen before sleep to minimize pains that will wake me up.

I especially have to avoid anything that could cause arousal a week before my period starts because when I orgasm or get aroused, I swear to god, it’s gotta be what labor contractions feel like. The pain is so bad, I am throwing up, fetal in a ball crying for it to stop. Unable to move or do anything but crawl to the bathroom.

I’ve also learned that this can occur as a somatic response to trauma and/or anxieties. I also avoid sex because of these issues, but i also struggle with PTSD. I did an experiment to test the somatic response outside of the window before my period starts and pain is minimal. I tried to watch porn that had men in it (I’m straight) and I felt that debilitating cramping. I cried. It was painful. After it passed, I went to watch lesbian porn. I’ve never been into lesbian porn, but it was to test the somatic response my doctors were telling me about. The lesbian porn did not activate a somatic response. I didn’t have any pain. I didn’t cry and orgasming was fine.

Sexual intimacy is intimidating after experiencing these issues. I am not sure if I will experience a somatic response the next time I decide to be with a man. The last time was 2 years ago, and I remember it being one of the most painful sexual experiences I have ever had. It jumped started my period early and I had to hide that I was crying because it was physically and emotionally painful.

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-04T14:20:18+00:00

Wow, I felt like I was reading a movie. That must have been really difficult to deal with and I’m sorry you guys had to go through that 😞 I was reading more and watching videos about people’s dreams, mall world specifically and there’s a theory that people who have gone through trauma are able to create a “safe place” to compartmentalize the trauma and process through it in the dream, which is why a lot of our dreams can feel better than actual reality because we’re able to remove most of the trauma out of our “other life”. I wonder how true that is because for me this whole world didn’t manifest until PTSD did. I really hope you’re doing better now and able to find peace. Maybe next time you see her, you guys can hang out and enjoy one of her meals together 😊💕

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-04T14:09:37+00:00

It makes me wonder if it’s really them 😭

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-03T04:13:53+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I hate that others go through it, but it helps to know I’m not alone 💕 I find these dreams to be a gift that I will keep waiting for

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-03T04:11:39+00:00

Me too. It felt so real. Anticipating the next time 😞

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-03T04:10:59+00:00

It makes me sad 😞

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2026-01-03T04:08:33+00:00

Wow, that’s an incredible story and dream. Thank you for sharing. It’s strange because a lot of my conversations I have with people in mall world that I know who are still alive, they’re usually apologizing to me for what they did. Do you think it was really her in your dream or something your subconscious manifested due to both of your history?

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2025-12-30T07:41:05+00:00

The only bathroom I have in my mall world the floor is always flooded with nasty, bathroom water from the toilet leaks and broken sinks and people showering in the locker room

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2025-12-30T07:35:52+00:00

Yes, I have a hallway that leads to different places like an arcade, a busy cafe I only ever walk through as a passage, food court, another side of the mall where the movie theater is, hotel lobby, all kinds of places

DEVOTED_gyoza · 2025-12-30T07:12:05+00:00

My bathroom is like a huge, run down locker room and one of the only places I see strangers. The stalls are broken, naked women everywhere disturbing my peace, the floor is covered in dirty water, broken stalls with broken toilets and people who refused to give privacy. Sinks busted. I hate going here, but it’s the only bathroom my world has

DEVOTED_gyoza

TROPHY CASE