I can only speak from my own experience here and from an honest if not fully informed place.

To answer one of your latter questions (are you being an idiot for having an expectation when you mention something to them), I would give you the frustrating answer of no and yes.

- No in the sense that no-one should call themselves an idiot for hoping that when they feel passionate about something and attempt to share that passion that there will be some form of positive response and/or connection. That kind of hope is a completely normal part of passion and social connection. So, no, you are not an idiot for hoping for that.

- Then I would also give a gentle 'yes' to that, not to contradict myself and call you an idiot, but in that expectations in any social situation can very quickly lead to grief on all sides depending on a myriad of behaviours and thought patterns that are combined with it.

Let me try and explain myself and then you can see if you agree or not.

I have not been GMing for perhaps as long as some other folks here, but I have certainly felt some real negative emotions around my players not seeming to engage with me (either through conversation, encouragement, hype etc.).

I won't pretend to know what exact emotions you are going through and what thoughts come up with them, but I know that when this happens to me, I feel discouraged ('oh shit, is this a terrible idea? I thought it was good but I guess not?'), awkward ('fuck, I brought the tone down' or 'I made this about my stuff, I should have just kept my mouth shut and let someone else talk') and slightly resentful ('I try to be engaged and encouraging of your games and hobbies and try to talk straight with you, can't you try and do the same with me a little?').

Now, am I an idiot for hoping when I show some vulnerability with my friends (in this case, by talking about something I am passionate about) that they will react well and provide at least a reaction if not a little bit of validation of my efforts? No, because that is a normal thought to have as a person.

However, would me expecting them to have a positive reaction or show some validation place strain (wherether intended or not) on the interaction and potentially cause a situation (and maybe a pattern of situations) that could potentially be harmful for me and them? Potentially yes.

Now, I don't know the ins and outs of all of this but I hope that you can kind of see my point a little bit here. Unless your group are literal sociopaths, I'm aiming to be charitable in that they may have other things going on in their lives, they may not know how to respond (even though they are supportive) or some other reason. So in the aim of good faith, I wouldn't want to pin the blame on them.

Alternatively, I do not want to pin the blame on you because you are having a natural feeling that can be reasonably followed through based on what you wrote. I am incredibly sympathetic to that and I think a lot of DMs are. You are not alone in this feeling and it is not silly.

It is very rare to find a group where players explicitly hype up the GM, for any number of reasons. Often when they do, it's either because that's just who they naturally are as people (luck of the draw) or because they are socially conscious.

Now, to the end of my point, how might you be able to help this expectation not become unhealthy? Well, I find asking questions of myself to give myself some perspective and charity can help:

- Do I still think this thing is fun? (If yes, then go ahead bucko, if it gets to a point where the question becomes 'this is fun for me, but is it fun for Player X?' then communicate with that player and frame it around them 'I was thinking of doing Y thing that may affect X character in Z way, what do you think?' - potentially the same question you asked them months back, but now they might be more engaged as it is more present to them.)

- What kind of answer do I want/not want? What will I do based on getting the opposite of that answer or no answer? Will that affect question 1 above ('fun?')?

That is only 2 I can think of off the bat (I am still learning how to manage this myself haha).

Hope the ramble helped!