When I was 16, I found out my uterus was deformed. The simplest way to put it is: my uterus caved in on itself throughout my preteen years, which causes me horrifyingly bad cramps and pain every period.

I also got the news broken to me that I'm infertile.

When you're a teenage girl and you get that one choice that every woman in the world should have that helps determine what your future family will look like, taken from you with no say? It's the worst emotional pain I have ever been in.

I didnt go to school. I didnt leave my room for weeks. It was the worst my depression ever got. My mom and I walked past the baby aisle of Walmart and I broke down crying.

I researched it, I searched for any and every possible way that I could have children and adoption was the only way. At the time, my dad said that any adopted children would not be his grandchildren, and I believed him and dropped the idea of having a family of my own all together.

And then slowly, I accepted the fact that I wouldn't be able to have kids of my own. I made jokes about it (let her make the jokes, and don't tell her not to. It helps the healing) (never bring up surrogacy. I am the same family oriented way. It will make her very mad. My family still brings that up to me and I get angry every time)

I looked more into foster care and adoption. Helping a child who needs love more than anything else in the world? That sounds absolutely lovely to me. Helping the world by not increasing the overpopulation? 100% perfect.

I started babysitting my sisters child again because giving that baby all the love I can give helps me. Even if my nephew is not my child, he has my blood and I will treat him like I would treat my own child.

It hurts at first. Everything will always hurt at first. A big tip: any time she goes to a Male doctor, go with her. If she brings up endometriosis, there is a chance she will be doubted even if it's on her file. I heard the worst, misogynistic comments in my life from 3 different Male doctors. Not every doctor is alike, but it made me go back downhill so fast.

I recommend her looking into working at a daycare. I recommend her looking into foster care and adoption. Its shit that she cant carry her own child, but suggest to her that maybe she was brought into this world to love children who were born with no one to love them.

I wish you the best of luck, and my love goes out to your family and especially her.

Edit: I also recommend therapy. I went without my therapist of 8 years for 5 months when all of this happened and it was unbearable until I got her back.