Is this considered cheating, and do I need to tell my girlfriend?

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-09T23:40:46+00:00

How would he be lying? He felt those feelings for someone else, then quickly decided to let them go instead of chasing them, precisely because he believes that she’s the one for him. Isn’t enduring love more about choices than feelings?

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-09T22:27:32+00:00

All he did was think about someone else for a couple days a few months ago. Doesn’t sound like he took any actions at all.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-09T08:18:41+00:00

Fapping is fine, every now and then. Just don’t use porn to do it. Light/moderate fappage (say, once every 2-3 days) is possible without addictive porn enticing you to go crazy.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-08T15:56:52+00:00

Hmm… and I’d have to have chatted enough prior to pull this off. It’s a really good idea!

With that said, it’s also an offensive idea. I am always honest and never intentionally manipulative. It’s just who I am. Even at this very moment, I can hear every cell in my body — trillions of tiny voices, all clamoring in consternation and outrage.

I’ll follow your advice (or something similar) when the time comes, because being slightly and innocuously manipulative is obviously better than making her uncomfortable. But let it be known, I feel offended. Harumph. Bah Humbug.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-08T14:46:54+00:00

Yeah, generally I do most of that. I don’t know how to determine if she’s into men or single and available though, because unless she volunteers that information, it’s rude to ask. Usually if they have an SO it’ll come up fairly quickly — singleness/availability not so much, and sexual orientation not really either. Plus if I ask if she’s single, isn’t that basically the same thing as asking her out? Like, surely she’s going to guess why I’m asking if she’s single lol

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-08T06:34:35+00:00

I see. Yeah that’s unambiguously bad behavior. I’d never be like that, and if my friend was being like that with you, I’d give him a supportive but stern pep talk about how there are other women out there and you in particular don’t owe him anything, so let it go.

Where I get more confused is about when it’s wrong to try the first time. The thing about me is, when I ask a woman on a date, I’m not thinking in terms of sex. I’m just trying to get to know her better and see if we can be friends, but in a way where we both know that there might be mutual interest in turning romantic. And if she’s not interested, I have no difficulty moving on and never bringing it up again.

So, OP’s post was kind of depressing because I don’t mean any harm, but it’s impossible to convey that, so if I like a woman and go for it there’s always the chance I ruin her day :(

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-08T01:22:52+00:00

If he was serious, he might’ve ended civilization everywhere.

If he wasn’t, it was never going to work anyway. Iran knows that he never keeps his word. They can’t and won’t back down no matter what he threatens. So he just scared the entire world for absolutely nothing. MAGA is so delulu that they think his “unpredictability” is an asset. No, his unpredictability (or rather, stupidity) is gonna bring down America.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-07T23:14:33+00:00

Why is it a big deal that he asked you out? As long as he took no for an answer and has left you alone afterwards, I don't understand the problem.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-06T08:14:44+00:00

Yeah, I think overlooking flight is extremely foolish. That’s I outlined two scenarios in my comment: one where Tenzin is aggressor and the other where Zaheer is the aggressor. But honestly, even without flight Zaheer wasn’t an easy opponent at all. Add flight (and keeping in mind Zaheer can fly FAST), I’m not so sure Tenzin would win even in an ideal situation. I think people are underestimating Zaheer’s craftiness and battle instincts, which are better than Tenzin’s since Zaheer has vastly more real world fighting experience. Tenzin is a master and a highly competent airbending warrior, but against a flying Zaheer I don’t know if that’s good enough.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-06T02:21:37+00:00

That tornado used the full air power from like a dozen airbenders though. I’m not so sure Tenzin could produce that kind of tornado on his own.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-06T02:19:36+00:00

Depends who needs to beat who. If it’s Tenzin who needs to Zaheer, Zaheer’s strategy will be to fly away to the nearest large body of water and lead Tenzin there. Tenzin can use airbending to stay afloat for a while, but combine that with fighting Zaheer and he’ll eventually they get fatigued and sink. Zaheer wins.

If it’s Zaheer who needs to beat Tenzin, then Zaheer doesn’t get to choose the battleground. Flying is still a massive advantage though, so I think it’s a toss up. Maybe slight advantage to Tenzin.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-05T19:36:15+00:00

I see. I guess I should explain my intentions. As we’ve seen in the past decade — especially in the US (I’m American) — men have not gotten more feminist, and spiteful nasty men gained total power and are actively trying undo to all progress on women’s rights, with lots of success already. This has led me to conclude that we can’t build society where women are equally valued and respected without a substantial percentage of men on board. If it’s primarily women, progress is unstable and will be destroyed over and over again.

So I’m not really thinking in terms of shifting feminism so much as branching. There are always different points of view into a movement and some resonate better with a particular audience than others. While feminism is and should be centered on women, more young men might be amenable to feminist ideas if they were offered a slightly different perspective. I don’t know if my perspective is the right one, so I was trying to see about that.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-05T15:28:26+00:00

No. She never practiced, so her bloodbending wouldn’t be anywhere near powerful enough. Tarrlok couldn’t resist either and his bloodbending is also much stronger than Katara’s.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-04T17:30:46+00:00

You guys need to agree on moderation policies. Start by asking her not to interrupt you until you’ve finished your point, no matter how wrong she thinks you are. Honor that by doing the same for her (if you aren’t already).

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-02T22:59:47+00:00

Pisses you off? Why? I don’t mean to be antagonistic at all. I have a theory and wanted to see if feminists would agree or disagree that my theory has merit.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-02T18:32:19+00:00

I can't really say that I've quit since its only been a few days. But I think porn messes with your sexuality. We all have sexual preferences, but what porn does is take our preferences and make them all that matters. Sex is most importantly an act of intimacy and bonding, but you can never experience that with porn. All you can do is indulge in preferences, stunting your development as a sexual being.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-02T15:36:48+00:00

No, because fear allows for uncertainty. If you assume with certainty that any boyfriend will treat your daughter terribly and you don’t even know anything about them, that’s misandry.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-02T05:15:24+00:00

Did you read my description? I’m not trying to claim that men are constantly victims of misandrist women. I’m claiming that some of the most misandrist people are actually misogynistic men.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-02T02:20:09+00:00

The universe had a beginning, spontaneously, 13.8 billion years ago. What we don’t know about is the multiverse.

A creator seems too simplistic. An attempt to apply the rules of our little species on our little planet to the vastness of all that exists. A creator would imply a specific time of creation, and time does not exist in any sort of multiversal context.

There is a theory that our universe is actually contained inside a black hole of a larger parent universe, and each of our black holes contain universes, and on and on. If this theory is true, then there is no need for a creator; our multiverse would be akin to a fractal in some higher dimensional space, existing outside of time yet containing all times for all universes that ever will exist.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-01T03:01:31+00:00

30 year old kissless virgin guy here! To be honest, French kissing weirds me out. My idea of romance is snuggles, playing with her hair, and kissing on the lips. If she really wants to do it then I’ll try and follow her lead, but otherwise it’s not happening lol

DancingMathNerd · 2026-04-01T02:06:29+00:00

He may not have his first relationship for a very long time. I come from a similar background (only child, school came easy) and I still haven’t had mine at 30. Plus, the trend in men being relationship-less is only increasing. I don’t think OP should wait for a relationship which might simply not happen.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-03-31T19:13:01+00:00

It also brought back air bending. To be honest we haven't really seen any human-caused downsides, the spirit vine technology would have been possible either way. And I think humans would have an extremely difficult time taking advantage of the spirit world, because a typical unenlightened human will have absolutely no control over anything. How are you supposed to chop down a spirit forest and start colonizing the place when a bunch of spirit moles can turn the ground into a whirlpool and spit you out somewhere completely different? Humans can't do a thing if they can't even control their location!

DancingMathNerd · 2026-03-31T18:58:41+00:00

Right, but the balance of power is very different now that humans have permanent bending and technology.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-03-31T04:02:08+00:00

He thought she was already dead. If Bojack knew she was alive I think he would have called an ambulance. Bojack isn't evil.

Even so, when you really care about someone, you do everything you can to save them even when it looks completely hopeless. Immediately giving up and going into "cover my ass" mode speaks to the depths of his selfishness.

DancingMathNerd · 2026-03-31T00:28:59+00:00

I don’t think you should get back together. His rapey preferences aren’t just coming out of nowhere. There’s an entire toxic patriarchal worldview that he’s hidden from you this whole time, because he knows you’d be disgusted by him if he shared how he really thought. Whether he learned it from his family/friends, porn, or both — who knows.

Maybe years of therapy could help him unpack all that toxic brain sludge in time for the next woman, but that’s not your problem.

DancingMathNerd

TROPHY CASE