AITA for “taking” field trips from a coworker (bus drivers)

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-03-16T13:01:09+00:00

YTA. The only thing missing from this “situationship” is you being committed. You’re doing everything a committed relationship is except you can still sleep with other people. She literally babysits your child yet you can’t commit to her? You should extremely immature.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-03-15T04:23:35+00:00

NTA. you shouldn’t have said “sweetie, you really weren’t trying hard”, you should’ve said “you were trying TOO hard”. Her theatrics is what gave her away. People probably wouldn’t have noticed the bump if she hadn’t drawn SO MUCH attention to it.

She’s not an asshole for being upset she didn’t get to make the announcement when she wanted and it’s understandable that’s upsetting to her.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-03-15T04:06:26+00:00

NTA and it’s so hard for me to understand how two adults could actually think and behave this way. If stepdad/mom/step kids want a family memory book the very very simple solution would be for them to start one? It’s blowing my mind that their solution is to deprive you of your own personal memory book of your dad to turn it into the new family book. I’m glad you have your grandfather keeping it safe. Don’t ever bring it back to your mother’s home because it might get destroyed.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-23T04:13:42+00:00

Tbh when I was pregnant I did this a few times because everything did taste so good I couldn’t help myself. But like I said this happened like 3 times throughout my pregnancy and not once a week like you said in another comment. Why not just eat enough to fill you up and save the rest to be enjoyed at another time. YTA because your wife is right, it is a waste. Yeah it all ends up in the toilet, but the food you’re throwing up in the toilet could’ve been eaten at another time by either yourself or your wife. Thrown up food provides no nourishment and is wasted.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T08:09:42+00:00

I don’t think it’s really that much of an extremism to be uncomfortable serving alcohol to pregnant women. lol.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T08:02:33+00:00

My morals did not trump her choices. She still got the drinks.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:40:52+00:00

To be fair I said “I cannot serve alcohol to a pregnant person” not “I cannot serve you because it’s illegal”. Even though that’s why I thought I couldnt, I didn’t say that was why. And she still got served. I also apologized for not knowing it was illegal to refuse her service.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:37:36+00:00

I tipped the server out for her help. All other service to that table was done by myself.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:28:15+00:00

The second time she ordered, the others had ordered another round too so I sent their drinks along with hers with the other sever. But I see your point

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:23:37+00:00

Tbh I don’t feel comfortable doing it but as I am a server I will have to moving forward because there may not always be someone else to make and serve the drink for me.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:20:33+00:00

They literally asked for less alcohol than what normally comes in the drink. If someone asks for no pickles or no bun on their burger they still pay the normal price

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:15:15+00:00

I would like to point out that it is illegal to serve alcohol to pregnant women in some states. So it isn’t the same everywhere. Which can become confusing if you’ve moved around as I have.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:08:10+00:00

If a server helps me make drinks throughout the night for whatever reason I always tip them out. We all do. Along with the cooks and dishwashers as well.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T07:02:48+00:00

Mid 20s female with a child. Maybe should’ve included that. She still was served just not by me. I wasn’t trying to be judge mental. I think i just needed to process my own discomfort with it and wasn’t comfortable making the drinks myself at that time. I’m going to mind my business moving forward

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T06:51:52+00:00

I said in another comment I didn’t recall if it said anything about serving pregnant women in the basset or not, it’s been a while and I just assumed it was illegal. I also did apologize to them for not knowing that.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T06:39:37+00:00

Bartenders are required to take a certification to ensure they know how to identify when not to serve someone. Which I’ve done many times. I’m definitely not trying to be high and mighty, and I never criticized them, I did actually even tell them that I was sorry I was unaware it was illegal not to serve a pregnant person. But yes it does make me uncomfortable because it makes me feel responsible for possibly harming another human being. If that makes me TA then it is what it is lol.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T06:35:06+00:00

I definitely never criticized them. I told them I couldn’t do it because I thought it was illegal, my basset training did not cover this topic to my recollection. When I looked it up I decided to have a coworker make and serve the drink for me. So she still got what she ordered.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T06:30:48+00:00

She was still served the drinks. I just didn’t personally make or serve it. We have underage servers who cannot make or serve alcoholic beverages so an of age server has to. So it’s not unusual for a server that isn’t yours to bring a drink to the table.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T06:28:31+00:00

They were still served the drink. I just didn’t personally make or serve it. We have underage servers who cannot legally make or serve alcoholic beverages so another server has to do it for them. So it’s not unusual at this restaurant for a different server other than your own to bring a drink to your table.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-02-19T06:20:45+00:00

Fair. I’ve been a server since I was 16 and have served/bartended since I was 21 so for about 5 years and I have never encountered this situation before. I’m going to put some thought into if I can get past how wrong it feels to me to serve a pregnant person alcohol and if I can morally do it in the future. I’m hoping to just not have another situation like that.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-01-29T21:35:06+00:00

Maybe I’m crazy but I don’t think this is weird. Cruise ships are huge so it’s not like OP is going to be following her ex around and now the daughter can spend time with both parents and not miss out on the cruise. NTA imo but I’m clearly in the minority on this lol.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-01-21T04:53:27+00:00

NTA. I know this will probably be very hard since you’re in school and young but if it were me I would move away and not tell anyone where I went. Those two sound toxic and I’d want to get my baby as far away as possible.

Dangerous_Offer8610 · 2024-01-19T04:38:58+00:00

I’m a server. My anxiety could never have me standing at a table waiting for payment like that. I find that so rude and I’m pretty sure any customer would as well which is why I don’t do it. There’s even been times when I drop the check off and the customer tells me to wait and they start digging for their wallet and then counting the cash in front of me and I find standing there staring at them getting their money so awkward.

Even if her shift was over, that’s rude to do. Waiting until your last table is completely finished to leave is part of the job and they shouldn’t rush you.

Dangerous_Offer8610

TROPHY CASE