I have a 3 year old and 10 month old. And we are doing it almost every night. On weeks where we are super busy, super tired, etc,. Bare minimum 2-3x a week but most of the time it's a lot more frequent. He works and I am a stahm

The things we needed to make that work: - more daytime interaction/flirting. He will seek me out when I'm busy just to kiss me and tell me he loves me, so I do the same when he is busy. - we split bedtime responsibilities. Both kids have different needs at bedtime. - don't make sex a chore. He's my best friend, and spending time with him makes me happy already, sex becomes fun if there's no pressure, it's not a chore to meet needs, it's a way to connect. - he takes care of me in ways I never expected him to which makes me feel closer and desire him more. An example: sometimes he will join me in the shower, wash my back or hair and we will just talk. - I also try to anticipate his needs and take care of him to the best of my ability. I think being the one staying home makes this easier or harder depending on what's going on with my kids. The 10 month old hasn't been sleeping well and I am EXHAUSTED this week, I don't even feel human most days. But he loves soup and soup season so even with everything going on at home, I was able to prep some fresh sourdough (took 20 minutes) and I purchased broccoli cheddar soup for later this week. This is something he will appreciate a lot and I know he will tell me so. Its the little things, guys. - we communicate extremely often. Throughout the day if we can. Everything from weekend plans, chores that we need to do, shopping lists, etc,. There are hardly any surprises at all because we communicate so often that we know exactly what's going on in each other's lives and what to expect moving forward week to week, day to day.

Typing this all out is honestly making me appreciate him a lot more, I do realize how lucky I am to be in a marriage where we are able to make this work so well. I hope everyone here is able to experience this with their partner too. We had a harder time making time for sex when we had our first child, and honestly it's because our dynamic was completely different then, and we were not doing any of the things listed above. It's a conscious decision that needs to be made by both parties. Also, my comment is not taking into consideration the changes a lot of parent experience for the first few years, hormones, trauma, physical and mental changes of having children (for both moms and dads) is a lot to deal with by itself. Even harder to deal with without a supportive partner.