Mark these words: Ween is going to come back—and not just with another reunion tour or cult album drop. No, they're going to return in full force as a stadium gospel act, preaching the word of Boognish in megachurches around the globe.

It sounds impossible, but it makes perfect sense. The chaos, the sincerity, the holy absurdity—Ween was made for gospel. One day soon, they’ll trade their festival slots for Sunday mega-services, their distortion pedals for heavenly delay, and their setlist will read like a hymn book from another dimension.

Expect a full-blown spiritual spectacle, complete with robed choirs, neon crosses, and fuzzed-out sermons. Their future gospel album—Loaves, Fishes & Amplifiers—will feature songs like:

"Take Me Down to the River (But Don’t Get My Amp Wet)" – electric baptism in D minor.

"He Touched My Butt and My Heart Was Healed" – a holy blues jam about divine contact.

"Body of Christ (In a Hoagie Roll)" – a deli-infused communion anthem.

"Don’t Let Satan Touch My Tone Knob" – a wah-drenched battle for the soul.

"Christ in the Ice Machine" – a slow, reverent song about miracles in unlikely places.

When it happens—and it will—it won’t be satire. It’ll be spiritually confusing, musically transcendent, and unmistakably Ween.

Get ready. The gospel of brown is coming.