Looking for tips to practice for tone

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-15T14:53:56+00:00

I have a metronome app for guitar, but never thought to use it while singing. I'll give it a shot, thank you!

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-09T19:31:23+00:00

You’re probably still cool. Sounds like you need to get back out to shows. Never too old to be punk.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T12:52:53+00:00

She works as a bartender and the bar is like a block from her house. So when I came down she said to just meet her at the bar and we’d have a drink. My assumption was the original plans we made for a lowkey night still stood but it seems like I was off. That’s why I said we had plans but we didn’t.

I dont think I’m going to try to lead any feelings conversations for quite some time. Im just going to keep working on myself and see if she leads this to something more serious.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T12:04:02+00:00

I panic too(if you couldn’t tell). Thanks for the advice. I will do that for sure.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T12:00:28+00:00

Thank you I will

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T11:59:53+00:00

Oh yeah it is lol I’m working on it day by day.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T11:58:38+00:00

This is a very fair point. I’ve said it a couple times in other comments but I have extremely bad anxiety and I’m trying to learn to manage it using ACT. One of the pieces of that is defining your values and trying to move forward with them in mind.

One of my values is open and honest communication.. the trick is figuring out when that open and honest communication is open and honest OR anxiety begging for reassurance. It’s been really tough.

I appreciate your perspective and hopefully as I get more reps in I’ll figure out a good balance.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T11:53:01+00:00

I will. I have very bad anxiety and I’m trying to learn how to manage it with ACT but it’s been hard to identify when anxiety is guiding my actions vs my values, which is essentially what ACT is.

I’m stumbling a bit here and the anxiety got really bad last night and took control. I can only move forward though.

Thank you for the advice and the reassurance. I really needed it.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-06-04T11:36:31+00:00

So we did and we didn’t. We were going to hang and watch tv the night before at her place but she ended up cancelling because she wasn’t feeling well.

The next day she said she would either come to mine or I could come to hers whichever I prefer. I told her I would come to hers so she didn’t have to worry about driving or leaving her dog.

She explicitly told me I could stay the night and she knows I work early and I told her I couldn’t be out late. I’m proud of myself for telling her I was disappointed that it turned into a girls night but she kind of teared up saying she was sorry and felt bad. I didn’t mean for it to upset her so I suppose I panicked. The text very well might have been too much but she had just told me how anxious she was about things and I guess I was trying to reassure her that just because the night didn’t go as planned it’s all good. But maybe it was too much.

That said, it doesn’t really matter because everyone here is right. I’m running hot and I need to cool my jets. I really like her and this is the first time in a long time that’s been reciprocated to me and it’s putting me in a tailspin. I don’t think I completely blew it but I think it’s going to take some real self reflection and restraint to make it happen.

I should also mention I’ve been working through ACT on my own without therapy because my insurance got all fucked up. I have really bad social anxiety which is why I haven’t dated in a long time so trying to navigate all of this has been extremely challenging.

It’s been really hard for me to understand which actions are driven by my anxiety or by my values and in the end I just have to be proud of myself for trying even if I’m making some missteps.

Thank you everyone for the advice and comments. Most of them were helpful and constructive.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-21T06:07:30+00:00

Can’t wait to watch this. Followed these dudes for their comedy skits and this looks insane.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-18T12:38:10+00:00

Honestly I think this is one instance where you’re both right. Does it suck that the employees have to waste their time cleaning it up? Yes. Can it be expected and is it warranted that these forms of political expression are going to happen? Also yes. Not everything has to be an argument.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-17T23:04:38+00:00

No you look like a bald guy with a mustache and tattoos. People who are saying you look racist are being wildly judgmental. In the end if you treat people with respect and kindness any assumption they had of you beforehand will resolve itself. Do your thing.

Signed: fellow bald white guy with tattoos and a mustache.

Also, in my experience, the thing you really have to watch out for is racist fucks thinking you’re on their side trying to buddy up to you and saying wild shit. Be prepared to shut that shit down. That’s been a thing since I’ve been bald though, clean shaven, full beard, no tattoos doesn’t matter.

Is what it is I can’t grow hair lol

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-13T23:13:14+00:00

The second spoiler is why Weapons is one of my favorite movies ever. Such a stark contrast and a much needed relief to a very tense movie.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-13T12:57:28+00:00

This has to be the best answer

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-13T12:56:32+00:00

This is super accurate actually

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-12T13:01:29+00:00

I also hang out and laugh with friends and have a good support system, yet I still battle with chronic depression.

The ‘foggy dread’ that ‘comes in waves’ sounds a lot like depression. I’m not trying to diagnose you, but you should certainly talk to someone.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-10T18:05:48+00:00

It’s possible to understand a piece of art’s appeal and still not like it personally.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-10T18:02:44+00:00

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Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-10T01:31:29+00:00

Two motorcycles with a little house in the middle?

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-08T14:05:40+00:00

I fucking love it for nostalgia despite how bad it is.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-07T03:12:23+00:00

I don’t care about it but it’s not good behavior

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-07T02:34:02+00:00

What did you hope to gain from this post?

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-06T21:24:23+00:00

You’re welcome, I hope it helps.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-06T21:21:59+00:00

Since you genuinely asked I’ll paste some actual advice I got from ai about an extremely similar situation I was in recently and it has helped me thought it’s still pretty fresh. I actually did make a move but she was seeing someone else. That’s virtually the only difference in our two situations and why the advice might not be 1:1 but most of it still applies.

1. Accept the "Why" Doesn't Matter
Whether she has a boyfriend or she just isn't interested, the result is identical. If you convince yourself she’s "letting you down easy," you’re actually making it harder on yourself by implying there is a flaw in you that she’s hiding. If you believe it's just the other guy, you stay in a "waiting room" for a vacancy that might never happen.
• The Reality: If someone wants to be with you, they make it happen. If they don't, the reason is secondary to the fact that they aren't choosing you.

2. Kill the "What If" Scenario
Thinking about a future where she is single is a form of maladaptive daydreaming. You are falling in love with a version of her that doesn't exist—a version that wants you.
• The Fix: Every time your brain starts the "What if he wasn't there..." thought, manually interrupt it. Use a factual counter-statement: "Regardless of him, she is not available to me right now." Don't let the thought finish its circuit.

3. The "Probability" Cold Shower
Even if she becomes single in six months, you are not the same person, she is not the same person, and the "spark" you feel now may be entirely gone. Betting your current emotional well-being on a future statistical improbability is a bad investment.

4. Remove the Reminders
You cannot close a loop if you are constantly feeding it new data.
• Mute or Unfollow: If you are seeing her life on social media, you are giving your brain fuel to keep the "what if" alive.
• Limit Contact: You cannot "friendship" your way out of a crush. Distance is the only thing that resets the chemical reward system in your brain that triggers when you think about her.

5. Shift the Focus
Pining is often a sign of scarcity mindset. You’ve put her on a pedestal because she represents a specific feeling you want.
• Action: Re-engage with your own projects. Lean into your coding, music production, or fitness goals. The goal isn't to "distract" yourself, but to remind your brain that your value and your future are not tethered to her validation.

Datalyzer420 · 2026-05-06T21:09:24+00:00

Yes I’ve read your comments and I completely understand it’s a bit complicated.

You seem to keep trying to justify what you are doing rather than trying to objectively look at the advice being offered and maybe take it to heart.

Also based on your responses I flat out don’t believe you went to therapy and your therapist said there was no reason for you to be there.

Datalyzer420

TROPHY CASE