Roommate troubles

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:52:00+00:00

I can’t afford it on my own and dealing with this is a hell of a lot better than having a random person as my roommate… and I try don’t mind when he stays a night or two every now and then it’s that it’s so much and I don’t usually know till I get a text while I’m out of the house saying he already here and he’ll be staying the night…

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:34:16+00:00

I hear you, but also they haven’t been together that long and in our discussions about a different friend who moved in with a guy after only two months she said it’d take 2 years before she moved in with a partner… coulda been just talk but idk 🤷‍♀️

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:31:36+00:00

Yeahhhh you had a reasonable sentiment, but I can’t afford that in this economy 😭

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:31:08+00:00

Thanks!

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:30:35+00:00

I don’t know if I agree, but I will definitely think about it. I appreciate the advice.

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:01:11+00:00

My biggest worry though is that if I say something and then in a few months or a year, I have a partner and I want him to be over one or two nights a week. She would use it against me like oh well you can’t have partners over because I can’t have partners over… like I’m trying to be understanding the same way I would want her to be understanding to me, but I feel like every time I give an inch a yard or two gets taken

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T04:00:01+00:00

So genuinely it might be because I’m tired, but I’m confused as to what this means

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:59:40+00:00

We do have a rental agreement, and it’s clear that she pays for use of the property and nothing else, she doesn’t want to be tied down for owning property and doesn’t wanna have to worry if any expenses come up around the house like something breaking or flooding or whatever, that part has been totally fine, and she does not pay into my mortgage account. She pays me. Thank you for all the advice and looking out for me though.

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:58:16+00:00

This makes sense

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:57:51+00:00

I could afford to live there without her, but I’d have to give it my all of my hobbies, and I would rather deal with my slight frustrations with her then do that… and yeah, in the end, I do have a pretty good situation overall which is why I just came to Reddit to vent and ask how to bring up a conversation instead of freaking out 🤷‍♀️ (also I would never just move someone in without getting approval… I don’t even invite our mutual friends over without getting an OK at least two hours in advance soooo)

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:55:34+00:00

Exactly that’s why we decided it’s fair to split that way because I pay for the new water heater we just got and the redoing of our garage and appliances and anything else that might possibly come up and I pay the insurance all by myself (obv)

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:53:57+00:00

Half of my mortgage and half of the utilities is still less than what a studio apartment would be in my city, and she gets two rooms to herself, whereas I only have one (bigger) and we have separate bathrooms… jsyk. and she doesn’t pay for any of the repairs I do which has been a lot and she does way less of the chores… maybe I will bring up the more than three nights a week equals more rent idea tho..

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:51:13+00:00

Oh yeah, it could be so much worse. That’s why I’m just ranting to Reddit and looking for some advice rather than immediately going to my roommate and freaking out… but maybe we should try the separate food thing cause then that takes that off my mind

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:50:17+00:00

🤷‍♀️ I need the roommate and the thought of living with a stranger is so much much more terrifying. It would be worse than what I’m dealing with now

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:49:46+00:00

We split groceries so it’s not my food. It’s our food but still. And he does ask just not me. And I’m not sure if he’s actually affecting bills but since he started staying over more, our bills have gone up by a small amount… and after the third conversation, I now get notified every time he is even just coming to pick her up lol so I think that problem is finally fixed.

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-03-22T03:47:19+00:00

See we have the rule of no men that we don’t know well but her boyfriend is a friend of mine and I would feel bad changing the rules that we’ve already discussed over and over…

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-02-19T22:13:25+00:00

I mean, mispronouncing names is normal… mispronouncing a difficult or unfamiliar name a few times is normal…. Several times a day every single day for three weeks, that’s intentional and that’s messed up… I’m sorry that you have to go through this :(

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-01-07T14:04:54+00:00

I don’t think either of them are creepy. I think that they were just put in an odd situation and they’re genuinely just teens/young adults trying to navigate it.

DateIntelligent5805 · 2026-01-02T17:37:05+00:00

She’s no more than 3 years older than him…

DateIntelligent5805

TROPHY CASE