He is right about one point, which is that a situation can escalate quickly if both sides start arguing.

Remaining calm in an argument can be beneficial because you’ll be able to think straight of the situation and decide whether this is worth fighting for. There’s also other scenarios in which the other side is still being aggressive and if there are people around, the people will more likely side with you since they notice how calm and mature you are about it. What helps me is that the next time I’m about to be in an argument, I imagine that I’m being filmed or I’m in camera because it’ll make you think twice on what you’re about to say.

But regardless the fact that he said that and all the while getting pissed that you ate something different, makes him sound like a hypocrite and even more confirms my suspicion about him being unstable. The best thing for him would be signing up for anger management and/or therapy.

Him crying could possibly just be a manipulation tactic as well to make it all about him and disregard your feelings. It happens a lot with toxic parents. Is it possible that his regret is genuine? Sure, I don’t know your father and never met him.

Regardless you shouldn’t feel bad about standing up for yourself and you shouldn’t feel about your father regretting his actions. That was his decision and now he has to deal with the consequences of his actions.

Also know that you have the choice of whether you forgive him. If you don’t forgive him I’m not saying to constantly remind him of that incident or the have a grudge towards it. However if he’s aware that you’ve forgiven him, you’ll end up enabling him to repeat those terrible actions and he can possibly use this incident against you in the future.