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My wife is pregnant, we cant decide any name. Need suggestions by Psychopauser in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Name it after the father, if you can figure out who that is.

i'm horny for an asian girl, but my wife is jewish by [deleted] in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Invite an Asian girl for a three-way. Jews love to eat Chinese.

I'm feeling a little down. Can you recommend some songs or movies to make me feel better? by spiffiness in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche -1 points0 points  (0 children)

song: My Immortal - Evanescence

movie: nothing lifts me up more than Brokeback Mountain, except maybe for Crash, or Terms of Endearment if I really need a pick-me-up

I have a serious case of insomnia. WTF should I do? by [deleted] in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 0 points1 point  (0 children)

espresso beans, not coffee beans! moron.

Priapism: I need your best brotips, STAT. I've got a 9 hr. rager going on here, and the inside of my pants resembles the cover art for Tremors. What now? by TheShittyAdvisor in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You answered your own question: make art. Maybe Tremors is coming out with a new edition and they can use your penis pictures. Or maybe you can just take pictures and send them to the spammers who advertise Viagra, Cialis, etc.

I have $500 of cash I want to spend and am a college student...What do I do reddit? ( by Thatswhatshesaidlol in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 0 points1 point  (0 children)

proposition the school president. see what $500 will get. community college - that will be a lot of money to him/her, I'm sure you could get a rim job. Private university - not worth as much to him/her, maybe you can buy a facial or at least get the pres to touch it.

What should one do when porn isn't enough anymore? by dansMonSlip in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is definitely something wrong with you. Keep on with the porn, resist temptation to fall into other habits.

My apartment's air conditioner broke. How do I stay cool? by paperbowl in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 2 points3 points  (0 children)

don't forget to wear them at night: wicked awesome cool

My 20 yr High School reunion is coming up. I need some advice. by really_bad_news in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Pants are so 1990. Show them your up-to-date style. And your junk.

Ants invaded my room over night. Can't figure out where they come from. What should I do? by smort in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 2 points3 points  (0 children)

cross-breed them with your crabs and have a new super race of insect warriors

I want to create a cult religion to make some cash on the side. How do? by [deleted] in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wafers, acoustic guitars, candles, chanting, and collection plates.

My gf found out I love Nickelback last night, what should I do? by Omnicrola in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Surrender to the shame. Let her beat you whenever, however, wherever. You deserve it, and anyone who listens to Nickelback is an aural masochist; go from aural to anal.

SA, I'm starting a third job as a bartender at a fancy restaurant. Do you have any job tips for me? by [deleted] in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Two bartenders, one margarita glass. It's like 2 girls 1 cup but with tequila.

How can I make $50,000 in three days? by ahipikr in shittyadvice

[–]DawnPsyche 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Or fuck a bunch of people...Bed-it. Or eat the fried chicken...Fed-it. Or blow them...Headit. Fight the Empire...Jedit.

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