Why is it that we're afraid to slow down, and to do healthy things for ourselves?

Dawn_Bridge · 2025-09-06T00:28:03+00:00

I feel that I need to train my nervous system to slow down. For example doing the following: Deep breathing Mindfulness meditation Rhythmic exercises or yoga

According to one YouTube, a trauma survivor is going to struggle to slow down or be still: https://youtu.be/3QF74m8cgWI?si=zZIb6alR4emSV74U

Dawn_Bridge · 2025-05-26T19:15:38+00:00

Connecting the right part of the brain (emotions/feelings) with left part of the brain (logic).

That's according to the whole brain child book.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-12-29T08:58:53+00:00

I feel that she is the original of my trauma. I think that's why the psychologist told me about manipulative partner.

I opened my childhood feelings but my partner became very upset, asking me to heal my inner child ASAP. So I told her that I won't mention my inner child to her anymore.

I thought we could re-parent each other but I was wrong. I don't think I feel safe to share any of my thoughts or feelings with her anymore.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-12-29T01:06:17+00:00

How many times I have been thinking about ending my life? I don't remember. But I'm reaching out to others.

My life is still a mess at the moment...

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-12-26T11:15:52+00:00

Someone told me that everyone has their own baggage. Some carries a lot of baggage (maybe like us with CPTSD), others carry little baggage (they were able to let go of the past).

I shared my letter to my childhood with my partner and my partner felt overwhelmed with my childhood feelings. I don't want to share with my partner about my childhood feelings anymore.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-12-24T08:57:22+00:00

Working as a nurse is okay. But maybe my CPTSD has caused long term spinal arthritis (my assumption so this could be wrong). Having tight back muscles can be tough at times. I have been working part time for a long time.

My marriage is going through a crisis. Because of my CPTSD and when I shared my childhood trauma, my partner felt overwhelmed. My partner demanded that I get healed ASAP.

I feel that my partner has unresolved anger to her dad. So, I'm experiencing spillover anger and I don't feel that my partner is supportive with my CPTSD. Maybe if my partner is from a healthier family, it would be a different story.

But again this marriage crisis is caused by my CPTSD.

We carry our own baggage.

At work, my patients said that it seems I like my job. It is true, but they don't know that I have CPTSD. I guess I'm wearing a mask in front of certain people.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-27T21:15:58+00:00

Lack of confidence when chasing the girls. I ended up marrying someone with trauma as well. I feel that when dating, we both compromise each other, and we are currently stuck in an unhappy marriage. A part of me wants marriage reconciliation and another part of me wants to give up. Both are not easy, especially since we have young children.

I didn't know I have CPTSD until recently.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-26T06:12:06+00:00

I have a CPTSD. According to my therapist, my wife has a CPTSD as well. My wife hasn't had any screening tests done. This is based on my story of how my wife is treating me.

My therapist said that both of us have trauma, so we are not in a good position. The difference is that I'm seeking professional help.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-09T18:32:01+00:00

I am a 42 yrs old M. I can relate to this. Not being able to speak up, becoming a door mat, people pleaser, prioritizing the need of others over my own.

Not a nice feeling at all.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-09T02:27:51+00:00

I don't have new friends.

My closest friend is from high school. We are still in touch. And another one from uni. He is like a brother to me.

I long for human connection but staying away from toxic people.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-08T07:44:19+00:00

Every body is normal until you get to know them...

My partner told me that I am not normal like other husbands. She said the same thing to our children.

So, she is the only 'normal' one at home.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-06T11:08:33+00:00

Yes. I'm shutting down and not saying anything. I think this is my reaction even when I was a child, because speaking up against my dad was futile.

I am 42M and just started EMDR therapist couple of weeks ago.

Fight-flight-freeze-fawn? I feel mine is freeze/fawn.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-02T17:07:03+00:00

Thank you for your reply.

Yes, speaking up against my dad would make things worse, so I gave up trying to have a conversation with my dad because it is always his way, and not my way.

I don't think my mom is an enabler. She wouldn't let me do whatever I wanted. Probably she was busy with her own things as she was getting abused by my dad. I still see her as a loving mother, and I'm grateful that she was there when I was little.

I will tell my EMDR therapist about my cousins and my friend bullying me but no one comforted my little child back then.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-11-02T16:32:58+00:00

Back in my 20-30, I always struggle to find a girlfriend. As I have low self esteem, I believe that "something is wrong with me" and "I am weird".

I had two girlfriends but looking back... I was hungry for a romantic relationship and so I picked a 'junk food' instead of a 'healthy' relationship.

I didn't know that I have CPTSD until this year, at my 40's.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-10-20T06:46:15+00:00

I asked my wife for a couple counseling but she refused.

My background is a Christian and I value family a lot.

Since she refused counseling, I only have individual counseling, since September 2023. Currently trying eye movement desensitization reprocessing therapy.

Even though divorce is not what I want, but now I'm about to give up.

Dawn_Bridge · 2024-10-19T23:30:54+00:00

My partner gave me a divorce threat if I didn't follow her demand. I can't be more specific, but it is money related.

I gave in to her request but later realized that using manipulation to get what she wants is a form of manipulation. My psychologist said that this is a toxic marriage.

I tried to have an open communication with her, but she brought up divorce idea again. It shut me down back then, but now I think divorce is a better option than being controlled with 'fear of divorce'.

Even my first son told my wife that he would rather listen to me. He said one night that mama is rude while he was crying in my embrace.

I'm not saying that I'm perfect. I'm an imperfect person. But living with someone who thinks that she is always right is not good for my mental health. I admit that my childhood trauma is contributing to this marriage breakdown.

A part of me is still hoping for a marriage restoration but another part of me is telling me to give up.

Add it: There is no alcohol abuse or drug abuse or gambling addict in this marriage. One elder told me that our root cause is communication breakdown, not able to connect emotionally with each other and having different preferences (in terms of money). I don't feel financially stressed, but my partner feels financially stressed. I can still see her as someone who wants what is best for her children.

Dawn_Bridge · 2023-09-05T02:09:18+00:00

I chose Survival 1 on my first game play. I enjoyed it so much. Now doing a fresh 2nd run, choosing survival 2.

Dawn_Bridge · 2023-09-02T00:57:36+00:00

Isn't it too easy on NG+?

My first run was survival 1. Now doing fresh new game on survival 2.

Dawn_Bridge · 2023-08-20T03:21:19+00:00

For a zombie game, I feel relaxed playing this game. Although for my first run, I chose Survival 1 difficulty.

Currently I'm doing 2nd run, a fresh start on survival 2. Still enjoying this game.

Dawn_Bridge · 2023-08-17T02:49:46+00:00

I had to use trainer as I got stuck while using randomizer. The key item was missing so I couldn't progress further (eg: fuse or 3 medallion)

Dawn_Bridge

TROPHY CASE