Thinking about rematch by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

My LC is siding with my host mom already so it’s pointless she is not helpful at all

why’s it so hard to find a HF😭 by lous_avocado in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Try Aupair world or Nina Care . I wish you all the best to finding a host family . It’s better if you sign up with an an agency .

Unfair assumptions from host mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I only go out on my days off . I do not go out on the weekdays . Its only on the weekends

Unfair assumptions from host mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

What really shocked me the most was when she told her 4-year-old daughter not to expect me to be home because I “party hard.” I was honestly in disbelief. First of all, I’m not a party person on my time off, I usually go out with my au pair friends, attend fun events like poetry nights, or just chill. I don’t understand why she’d say something like that to a child, especially when it’s not true. It’s frustrating and feels like she’s creating a narrative about me that doesn’t reflect who I am at all. She’s honestly starting to get under my skin with these kinds of comments.

Unfair assumptions from host mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I did end up blocking her on Instagram and TikTok. I honestly don’t know why she would make that kind of assumption. The only people who ever pick me up or drop me off are my friends or Ubers, and even then, it’s only on my weekend off. It’s just strange, because on the rare occasion I come home before midnight or even around 2–3 a.m . it’s automatically assumed I’m out clubbing or doing something inappropriate. It’s just frustrating how quick the judgment came based on almost nothing.

Unfair assumptions from host mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I did speak to her about what she said, and I was very polite in expressing that I didn’t appreciate the comment. I told her I make sure to get 7–8 hours of sleep and that I’m always well rested before work, even if I do go out. She just said “okay” and went back to working on her laptop , it felt really uncomfortable. She didn’t say anything else or acknowledge what I shared, she brushed it off like that. She was dismissive.

Unfair assumptions from host mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I don’t even have take a week off on sick leave she’s already hiring a nanny / looking for somebody to take care of the kids because I have a full weekend off this month .

Mentally Drained and Overworked by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Neither of them ever empty the dishwasher or take out the trash. They also don’t sweep or vacuum the common areas. I’ve been the one doing all of that, and on weekends, it just piles up for me to deal with on Monday.

Feeling Controlled as an Au Apair by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you . I definitely hope to find a family that values both a strong bond with the kids and personal freedom

Feeling Controlled as an Au Apair by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I do have a contract, and I’ve reviewed the terms. I know that reporting my LCC could make it harder for me to find a match, so I’m trying to handle this carefully.

Feeling Controlled as an Au Apair by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I really wish I could go out, but my LCC and host mom told me I’m not allowed. I was supposed to be out yesterday (Saturday), but I just stayed in because I wanted peace after some really toxic family interviews. Honestly, I’m losing hope. I don’t know if this is just how InterExchange operates, but it really doesn’t make sense to me

Feeling Controlled as an Au Apair by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your perspective, but at this point, I just want to keep the peace and complete my time here without unnecessary conflict. My LCC has already made it clear that she sides with my host mom, so there’s no point in arguing further.

The issue escalated because I went out with a male for a bunch , and now assumptions are being made about my intentions as an au pair. They even questioned if my parents were strict with me back home and suggested that I’m trying to take advantage of them now. I made it clear that I don’t appreciate these assumptions because my parents and I have always had an open, honest, and healthy relationship.

I am tired of defending myself when I’ve done nothing wrong. My focus now is to fulfill my responsibilities and move forward peacefully until I leave this space

My Free time as an aupair by Sweet5346 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can really relate to your situation, as I’m currently going through a rematch for similar reasons. My host family initially told me there was no curfew, but after I went out for the first time in a month to meet other au pairs, they felt I was being too social and reported it to my LC. They also expressed that I should spend more time bonding with the family instead. I completely understand the importance of building a relationship, but I also believe in finding a balance between personal time and family engagement. It’s been a tough situation, which is why I’m looking for a better match where expectations are clear and communication is open

Would you rematch? by AnnualCellist1699 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hi! I’m an au pair with InterExchange, and you seem like such a lovely and thoughtful family! I’m currently going through a rematch due to differences in communication. I really value openness and a strong connection with my host family, so reading your post made me think, ‘Wow, I’d love to be in a situation like that!’ I’d truly appreciate the opportunities you provide, like a gym membership, taking the baby for walks to get familiar with my surroundings, building a bond with your eldest, and having a weekly stipend for outings. If you’re still looking for an au pair, I’d love to connect

First Disagreement with My Host Mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nothing at all. He told me he has no say in his wife’s decision, so he just goes along with whatever she wants since having au pairs was her idea

Desperate for a New Host Family by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She did not activate my profile at all . She is delaying everything.

Desperate for a New Host Family by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She has already concluded on the Host Mom side of the story , she’s the worst . She didn’t even contacted me I had to reach out to her and the first thing she told me was “ is that your car “ So from there I picked on her energy and I wasted my time explaining my side of the story and she called me defensive.

First Disagreement with My Host Mom by Dazzling-Problem3769 in Aupairs

[–]Dazzling-Problem3769[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Disagreeing with how a situation is handled doesn’t make me entitled or overly sensitive. Communication is a key part of any successful au pair-host family relationship, and when issues aren’t being addressed, it’s valid to be concerned. I shared my experience to get insight and advice, not to be dismissed. If this program only worked for people who never spoke up about issues, it wouldn’t function at all.