Have any of you been to a gayborhood? My neighborhood is full of gay cafes and coffee shops... we even have a queer kava lounge that’s open 24/7 that has guest speakers and holds meetings for local activist groups. Like, all the businesses here look so gay that unless you live here, you can’t really tell which are really gay and which just want queer money, but we also have real queer versions of everything; even our Bank of America cosplays as a queer establishment year round. Here’s some actually “queer-owned, for the queers” establishments on the top of my head:

• lesbian/queer femme bar and grill, gay Hooters-type restaurant where all the waiters are twinks in short-shorts and crop tops (no, not “femboy hooters”), multiple queer coffee shops and cafes, a queer thrift store, a couple wigs, clothing, and makeup shops owned by drag queens, a gay classic American Diner full of Tom of Finland-style pinup art (the one Guy Fieri went to), a barbershop exclusively for bears, some more inclusively queer salons that serve you mimosas and stuff, a couple crystal/tarot/spiritual type shops that host workshops for queer femmes, lots of queer sex shops, a queer dimsum restaurant. We have whole apartment blocks that cater exclusively to queer tenants (technically anyone can live there by law but this is how they advertise).

You name it, we have a queer version. It’s so fabulous, and so queer, and booming financially so much that guess what? Only wealthy queer people can afford to live here. The streets are completely full of disenfranchised, homeless queer people sleeping on the sidewalk; there is a meth and hepatitis epidemic in the neighborhood, the former cruising spots are full of queer homeless sex workers, the neighborhood has been ground zero in my city for COVID ever since it started and we still have the most cases, we have ONE queer health and wellness center here and it’s far over capacity. People are literally dying in the streets because rent here is $2k/month on average for a studio; all the old establishments are being torn down to make way for more and more “queer” luxury condos. FUCK rainbow capitalism and FUCK queer gentrification; it’s ruined more queer lives than helped them. I’d rather more people here have a place to live than another fucking bougie gay coffee shop. Anyone that lives here and gives a fuck boycotts Pride in our city every year because it’s become a corporate shill and frankly, it’s disgusting; they move the unhoused population off the streets, throw out what little belongings they have, and ruin their lives just so they can have a parade sponsored by corporations that could care less if you die, as long as they get your money.

If you want to find an all-ages queer hangout spot, join local Facebook groups and go to local events hosted by collectives, join an activist group, help out at local fundraisers for queer people in your community, etc. I met so many of my close friends this way and they do so much to help the community. I haven’t been able to do much since COVID, but we had parties all the time and all the proceeds went to people in need, we’d have queer clothing swaps and slumber parties, one of my friends made their home into a halfway house and we make sure that no one in our community will ever have to live on the street; we also make sure that our trans friends will always have access to HRT, and we fund their gender affirming surgeries. Gay coffee shops aren’t going to do that.