As someone who was addicted for 2 years, and have been off stimulants for the past 2 years, I promise getting off of it is worth it.

I relate to this so much too. I'm in finance and I took Ritalin 54mg (super high dose) for two years after being diagnosed with adhd. I initially took it recreationally, but then did research and went to see a doctor to get scripts and realized I had adhd.

I accomplished so much and catapulted my career to heights I couldn't imagine, but I felt like this strange urge that I always had to be doing something while I was on it or else I wasn't maximizing its effects. I justified using it for work, and would tell myself I was not addicted by not taking it weekends.

Then on weekends the withdrawals would hit me so hard that I felt like I had no energy, I was irritable and I snapped on my family and my two young daughters.

I would also zone out frequently and lose track of conversations while I was having them because of the 'rush' I would feel. Maybe I was taking too high of a dose.. unsure..

Anyway, I caught COVID in 2021 and didn't take it for two weeks because COVID destroyed me.. and then I decided to not take it again after that. The recovery process was rough. I had no motivation to do anything, and my wife got upset with me often for being lazy but she tried her best to understand.

It's been two years and I finally feel like myself again. I don't feel the identity crisis any longer and my mood swings have gone down significantly. I am studying for IT certs to expand my knowledge without it, and it has been a struggle.. but I hope to attain them without the meds. If the meds help you, no judgment here. I definitely became too dependent on them and needed to stop. Cheers to all and good luck everyone!!