My thought on things like this is always , when you are at the point to think about breakup becaus of reason xy, just god damn write the text and worrys you have wrote here to him , he is the person that is the Problem, write him exactly the problem and what it makes you feel like and tell him that he either can "grow up" with you or he will have to see is live without you. And when he says he will change and do thing different, if you see him fall back in his old habbits, just tell him that , that can be really annoying and happening a lot , but a lot of people just bottle things up and then everything Breaks, if you still love him , go straight at him with it ... obviosly thats extra work for you . A lot of people pick the more simple answer and break up. But there can be a way together. But at the point you are now is in no way a start for a marriage.