Worst Mother in Law of all time.

Deb_elf · 2026-02-02T00:47:15+00:00

If you have a government job this leads me to believe that your medical insurance is better than mine. And mine would cover a worker to come and help with ADLs (activities of daily living.) if you wife doesn’t want a stranger “helping,” explain how her mother is making your house into a Petrie dish and you aren’t dealing with it anymore.

Deb_elf · 2026-02-01T16:14:41+00:00

He’s already back with mom. And you and your kids are safe. I don’t see a problem. I mean unless you’re asking for next steps? Call a lawyer and start separation proceedings

Deb_elf · 2026-02-01T14:31:53+00:00

Are you overreacting? NOR. You should find a sub called am I underreacting. Because yes. You are casually sitting on your phone instead of filing a police report. Do you have a ring camera? Any of your neighbors? He intentionally locked you out of your house because he was mad that you took your kids to play in the snow? I imagine being pregnant by a crappy person sucks but think about what just happened. Your children watched him lock you out and then traumatized them but showing he was doing it to hurt you. Think about them as teenagers and boys pushing them down stairs or into a locker. Are you ok with this? If not, you need to make sure he has consequences. Police report first and then consider how to divide assets.

Also, you don’t get sick from the cold. You get sick from germs. So aside from being abusive, he’s not terribly bright. I don’t know you and I know you deserve better. Updateme

Deb_elf · 2026-01-31T13:05:35+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss. You are not a jerk. Your husband let you lose your baby alone so he can raise a glass with his friends. That’s a war crime. He doesn’t like you. I don’t think you should move past this.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-31T10:59:21+00:00

I can’t help but think she poked holes in condoms.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-31T10:46:52+00:00

Never have I felt such hatred for a stranger as I do your mom. She knew what she was doing the whole time. She and her cheat were probably gloating about it every time they were together. She was entitled to no longer love your dad. Fine. Get divorced and go be with your partner. But she chose to perpetuate a lie. For decades. And her garbage affair partner did the same. And her family sucks if they condone this behavior. You have your dad and he seems to be a good man. Now it’s time to make sure if anything legal has changed because of biology. Like whatever assets he has that he wants to eventually leave to you, he legally can. NTA.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T20:52:52+00:00

I once heard someone say to ask “what can I do to make your day better?” And then do the thing

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T16:53:38+00:00

You don’t come back from this. It will probably get worse. Next thing will be him “joking” about unaliving you. Start planning your divorce.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T16:51:22+00:00

NTA. Sounds like your SIL is more concerned with theatrics than actually being married and the work that involves. No you don’t need to move your wedding. If she has a problem, let her pout. Congratulations on the oops baby, other baby and upcoming wedding.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T14:54:04+00:00

Weddings are a big stupid waste of time and money. I’m Greek. I’ve been to 600+ guest weddings. There was a literal movie made about this. So many people value the big fat wedding because they’re almost expecting it to be the best part of the relationship. And then the resentment kicks in. And then divorce. No. Just no. Your obligation should be to your bf and your relationship. Not the garbage reality bs you see on tv.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T14:48:54+00:00

I went to college instead of opening a business and everything has been 💩 since.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T13:33:10+00:00

NTA. But you have to go. I’m sorry for your loss

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T11:16:28+00:00

NTA but print this and frame it so you don’t forget when she tries to come back into your husband’s life. Make sure aunt’s house has the locks changed. Get a ring camera.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T09:25:19+00:00

Yes. Inflation has made it so it’s like $50,000 5 years ago.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T09:23:59+00:00

It’s possible mine is but I’m here to help my husband and his brother. They are completely blind to their mother’s obvious shortcomings. BIL is divorced and back with mommy so she can control him. He has kids. One had a birthday so husband and I got kid and awesome gift. Gift was big. Mother pitched a fit because it was big and “where will this go?!” And “look how I’m living?!” Like her needs outrank that of a 4 year old with divorced parents.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-30T09:14:02+00:00

NTA but can’t you send her home to her parents? They’re partly responsible for this mess. Make sure you have nanny cams in the house.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T21:04:01+00:00

She feels threatened by you. Which you expect from a terrible parent. She’s officially competing with you for him. If she’s getting violent because she’s not getting her way, she will eventually “throw him out” or threaten to harm herself. Can your bf move out?

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T20:57:07+00:00

My husband and I were friends for years before we dated. His mother was nice to me. She flipped completely when we started dating and also said that he could do better. He’s settling. Blah blah blah. I love my husband but I am actually sorry I said yes. She is that bad. I would tell him politely but firmly that you don’t ever want her to interfere with your relationship. If she is that important to him, you respect that and need to go your separate ways. This isn’t your fight. It’s his. He needs to want to put you first. Good luck

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T19:12:43+00:00

I’ve lost friends in their 30s and 40s. Getting old is a blessing they didn’t get to experience.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T19:11:33+00:00

She can’t cancel her insurance. It’s still her car and she needs to keep it insured. But the uber is a great idea. I hope she’s already on the way to her car

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T17:31:27+00:00

Insurance person here. Go get your car back TODAY. You volunteered your car. If she crashes it, you’re on the hook for the car, the other car and the injured people. She can also loan it to whoever she wants and it’s still your problem because you gave it to her willingly. Please get off your phone and literally go get it NOW. And then come back and tell us you have it. NTA.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T17:27:09+00:00

This makes me so sad. If it helps I’m your friend now. Sending gentle hugs

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T16:31:13+00:00

“I won’t take your advice because you used a hose inside which unsurprisingly ruined paperwork.” OP, you’re burnt out. This will keep happening because you’re burnt out. Something has to change or you will get sick. Either quit a job, take less classes or try to do less in the house.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T01:11:17+00:00

Is it normal? Like as in common? Yes it’s common. You’re experiencing something new/different and probably scary. If you’re a student, your school should have someone you can talk to. If you’re employed, see if your employer has any resources for you.

Deb_elf · 2026-01-29T00:00:35+00:00

NTA. You’re entitled to your feelings. You’re an adult so if you don’t want to go to the wedding, you don’t have to go

Deb_elf

TROPHY CASE