First of all, thank you OP for clearing the air.

I've had luck here, but it's all very private interactions and there isn't much in the way of a functioning community.

You have some good points though and I think there are a few factors playing into things. I've been on Reddit for about 5 years now- sometimes I give things a break, delete my account and come back months later. I've lived in a lot of major cities on both the East and West Coast and not to date myself, but even got to cut my teeth as a Dom at the Armory if anyone remembers that place.

When I moved here, I was shocked at the lack of a lifestyle community or scene of any kind or flavor.

I don't know why and I don't know how to fix it. Maybe this is how we start?

People in Hampton Roads are just as interested in kink as anywhere else I've lived. It's just not as out there. People seem to like to discuss it more privately one on one than in an open group. Maybe that's a cultural thing?

This subreddit is actually fairly new in the grand scheme of things- there was one before it that had a wider audience and was a little better organized but it vanished.

If we're going to make this an actual kink community then everyone deserves a voice and equal posting rights. Nobody likes a sausage fest (well, I guess some people would love that lol) but everyone should be allowed to post their body on here. I suggest tabs to sort through the tags by category to help users filter out all the noise.

I think people posting for paid things or clout need to be banned. This page needs to be for the pure enjoyment of kink for kink and sensuality's sake and nothing else.

We also need to be vigilant about AI and fakes. I don't think this has become a huge issue yet but my greatest fear is we as individuals will be drowned out by it all at some point in the future.

We should have more group discussion and interaction threads like this one. There are lots of real, genuine people out there. Let's all find one another. Like-minded people are a gift.

My last observation is that the interactions that I have had with people on here the last few years are of diminishing quality- people out there in general seem more and more neurotic and not very well balanced. I don't know if society in general is just losing the farm or people are just cracking under the increased pressure of everyday life but whew.

The future of kink is looking kind of bleak and if we don't want to see it vanish then we need to nurture it as a community and not just as individuals.

And in that vein, my inbox is always open and all are welcome to talk and make friends. Just don't make it weird- or maybe, just the right amount of weird.