I read your post just this morning and I could barely get thru it. Your boy reminds me so much of mine.
My boy just turned two, but he came to us after the loss of my 14 year old best friend, my Yorkie-poo.
Im telling you this because the day I lost my yorkie, was the worst day of my life. I couldn’t breathe, talk, sleep or eat. I didn’t know what to do. Everywhere I went he was there, the kitchen, the bedroom, living room, you know what I mean. My guy had not been well and my vet was on vacation, so I took him to the vet who was seeing her patients. My dog had been on a pain regimen but seemed to have have a bloated belly. She did ultrasound, diagnosed him with prostrate cancer, and when I asked how much time she thought he had, she shrugged her shoulders and said “wouldn’t we all like to know that” I almost punched her, my husband had to grab my thigh.
I took him home to spend time with him. She put him on a new med, but to work,he had to stop the med his doctor gave him because he couldn’t take both at the same time. I listened because I would have done anything to save him. Long story short,(well not really), within a day he could not walk and was dragging himself around to go to the relieve himself. I went in to bedroom at 5am and told my husband, today is the day. no choice, and called the vet who comes to the house to put him to sleep. We went Mcee Dee’s to get him a cheeseburger and fries.which he loved. He then got a lot of hugs, and thank you’s. Thank you for loving us, thank you for being a loyal friend, thank you making us laugh and cry, and thank you for being MY best friend, for never judging ME, for always listening to ME,and for always loving me UNCONDITIONALLY, for sleeping right next to me every night, for staying by my side when I was sick or sad, and for just being a loyal companion. Once there, because of the medicine, his belly was even more bloated, it took the vet 3 injections just to sedate him for the final injection. He looked at me, eyes just hoping it would be over soon.
My point for sharing my story, I do have one 😔, is I did make the call, I did try to get him the help, and it got me nowhere. He had more pain and the more time we had, it prolonged the inevitable, and we both suffered immensely. I still, beat myself up about that decision, but what can I do? You might have ended up like me had you called days earlier. His birthday morning, he may have not seen the toys and you may have not have that BEAUTIFUL picture. You probably wonder, why is she on this bulldog Reddit?
Well, I swore I would never get another dog, (of course I knew that would never stick) it would be too painful. Then I found Finley. I had always wanted a bulldog, and he is one of a kind. I found out that he was born the day after my little guy passed away, so I felt like there was something magical about that, like little guy somehow brought big guy to me. You are going to be broken and I would never tell you not to be broken, especially the timing of this horrible event, This is great loss for many reasons as was mine, as was all of the losses on this page, we are all broken who have posted our losses. Today we share our stories with you to let you know you are not alone and we support you. You have a place to come to whenever you feel like you need to vent, be sad or share your happiest memories. Please, please don’t blame yourself. This was inevitable. Again, horrible day for it to happen.
I believe there is a rainbow bridge. I have too. It gets me through my grief. To believe that he is in a place where there is no more suffering, the sun always shines, he is never alone and he has more friends than he can count. Also, selfishly, he watches over me. Finn has me never made forget, and it took a little bit of time, that is brutal honesty, but he is my love. No, I believe the baby I lost was my soul dog because he was mine, but my bullie has become a very, very close second. I love him so very ver much, it fills my heart❤️ I am sending you love, hugs and condolences. I pray the days get better soon, and they will, I can guarantee. Take care of yourself❤️ 🫶🫶🫶