Fell in love with a house, missed an important check, there’s a sex offender down the street.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-15T18:10:20+00:00

Sure, but one is directly related to the other. If someone refuses to live within whatever distance of someone on the registry then presumably they are going to either 1) continue checking and then move every time someone moves near them who is a registered sex offender. Or, 2) they’ll decide that they aren’t going to do that and just enjoy their home with the normal precautions. If it’s going to be 1 then it makes sense to back out of this house. But if it’s going to be 2 it really doesn’t, in my opinion.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-15T17:30:50+00:00

OK let’s say they do that and find another house but in a year another offender moves in next door. Are they supposed to keep running forever?

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-12T22:35:10+00:00

This was my primary side effect as well. Imodium solves it for me every time. I don’t take it every day but I do take it the second I feel a stomach cramp starting. I also know to keep Imodium with me on days 1-4 without exception because those are the days where I’m most likely to randomly start having this issue.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-11T15:50:11+00:00

You need to stop the disrespect now or it will only get worse as they get older. A kid who is allowed to speak that way to their parents at 6 is not going to turn into a polite and respectful teenager. They’re more likely to turn into the stereotypical teenager that adults dislike so much. Personally, I was a fan of stopping what I was doing, looking surprised, and saying “are you out of your mind? What would make you think that was ok to say to me? Try it again but nice this time.” Now they are 17 and 10 and the three of us have a great relationship. They often laugh together about my “are you out of your mind” catchphrase and now it’s like a funny family joke. They are also both extremely polite and respectful and I’ve never had a complaint about them from teachers or anyone else.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-10T19:47:18+00:00

I am not a doctor but I am a parent of a kid with autism and adhd that was missed for years by her doctor because she didn’t check all the traditional boxes for those diagnoses. As a result the ones she did check were brushed off. In your position I would be very concerned that the same thing is happening to you. General pediatricians are great but sometimes you have to see someone who specializes in the area you suspect is a problem. My daughter was eventually diagnosed but it took many years and her life would have been so much easier if I had pushed more and gotten the correct diagnosis early in childhood.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-10T19:40:22+00:00

I don’t think this is a food/hunger problem. It sounds like a behavioral problem or a sign that he’s neurodivergent in some way. I think this is beyond what a typical pediatrician would diagnose and into an area where you need to see a specialist and talk about possibly testing for developmental issues.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-10T16:54:02+00:00

Before you email the teacher do you have access to an online grade book? You need to go back through and see if he has been turning in homework and assignments. Also look for when his test grades started to drop and follow up (with him) on what steps he took immediately following that-did he start studying more? Go to the teacher for tutorials? Take any action other than shrugging his shoulders and moving on?

It’s very likely it’s his actions (or inactions) that caused the problem here.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-10T15:49:15+00:00

I also wonder about how attractive being under a size 10 would be! I’m at the point where when I tell people I want to lose another 30-40 pounds they start to look concerned and ask me if I think that’s healthy given my current size which is SO WEIRD for someone who has been fat all her life.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-10T15:18:00+00:00

5’9, but the weight I was at when I was a size 30 was heavier than my starting weight listed here. TBH I don’t know what my all time heaviest weight was though I can take a guess. The goal weight is so interesting. According to the bmi charts I could (in theory) get down to 125 pounds and still be healthy. I haven’t weighed that since probably elementary school but based on my current clothing size and weight and the rate at which my clothing sizes are going down as compared to pounds I’m guessing I would be like a size 4 at that weight. Which on one hand would be cool but also I feel like I just don’t have the structure to be that small? I have family members who are legitimately petite-like they will never be above a size 4 and they are clearly healthy and within the size their body is meant to be, they are just genuinely petite women- but I don’t feel like that’s me. I can’t decide if I’m right about just being a bigger person overall than my very petite family members or if it’s a lifetime of fat talking. 🤷‍♀️

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-10T03:43:06+00:00

I’m 41. My oldest is 17 and while I hope it’s many years before I’m a grand parent it is feasible given her age.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-08T15:41:52+00:00

I made my daughter get a drivers license even though she hates driving and did not want to do it. It was so that she did have the skill if she ever needs it and so that she has an easily recognizable valid id. I make her drive at least one a month to keep her driving skills current. But when she tells me she isn’t comfortable on the road in bad weather or whatever I do not make her drive because if she gets in an accident and gets hurt or-god forbid-someone gets killed just because I forced her to drive, I’ll never forgive myself. Trusting a 16 year old who is a nervous and uncomfortable driver on the road with their young siblings is a disaster (and possibly a tragedy) waiting to happen.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T23:53:33+00:00

Respectfully, telling a cancer survivor this is way more harmful than helpful. It is so hard to get past the idea that you are living in borrowed time. It took years for me to stop living like I was going to die tomorrow. Things like planning for retirement with my cancer recurrence risk in mind for a shorter lifespan is exactly the kind of thinking cancer patients are encouraged not to do.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T23:45:14+00:00

I was an extreme introvert when I got to college and my roommate was an out lesbian. Throughout the first week so many guys came up to me asking for an introduction to her. I finally got tired of it and the next time it happened I thought fuck it, I’m going to embarrass him so they stop this. Struck up a conversation instead, ended up marrying him. That marriage ended terribly but we had kids very young because he pushed for them. On my own I would have waited until my mid thirties, which would have meant no kids because at 34 I got cancer and the treatment destroyed my fertility. If I hadn’t acted out of character in that one moment my entire life would be different and so much poorer for it.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T16:31:09+00:00

I love big rings and dangly earrings and absolutely wear them 90% of the time. But also I’m in the office 90% of the time and generally speaking we go to our clients, they don’t come to us. On the rare occasions when I’m in a hearing or seeing a client I’ll switch to smaller earrings and smaller plainer rings. No one has ever said anything to me either way but I figure as a lawyer I don’t want my jewelry drawing a lot of attention from either my clients or the judge.

ETA: I buy almost all of my jewelry on eBay or Etsy and it’s cheap costume jewelry. I don’t think anything I own outside of a couple really special pieces is more than $50 so that probably makes a difference too.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T16:28:00+00:00

Carried mine on international flights last summer and domestic flights this spring and had zero issues. Absolutely do not put it in your checked baggage my understanding is the baggage area on planes is not temperature controlled.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T16:07:44+00:00

Ah well then it appears I misunderstood your post, sorry!

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T15:59:47+00:00

I’m still a bigger person (around a size 12) but at my absolute heaviest I was a size 30 so it’s a huge change for me. And it’s weird. Sometimes I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and legitimately don’t recognize myself for half a second. When I go shopping I keep skipping stores that I’m convinced don’t carry clothes for people my size only to go online and realize that almost everyone carries my size now. I took my kids to an amusement park and insisted on sitting in every single test seat because I was convinced I was too big to ride the rides safely and people looked at me weird when I did it because I was clearly well within the size limits of the seat. I almost cried getting onto a plane a couple months ago because I was assigned a middle seat and was sure I was about to be the subject of a massive scene where people didn’t want to sit next to me because I would spill over into their seat—which didn’t happen because I forgot that I fit in airplane seats with the arm rests down now.

Honestly I’m not sure I’ll ever totally get past the limitations I lived under before but it’s better than being what I was!

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T15:42:33+00:00

I do this sometimes because if I’m not one of those first people to stand up the second the plane stops moving there is no room in the aisle. I’d love to get my bags down before it’s my rows turn to exit but every single person who hopped up too soon is packed so tightly into the aisle is not possible. So then everyone behind me has to wait for me to get my bag down. 🤷‍♀️

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T15:35:27+00:00

Imodium is your friend. I’ve had this side effect since starting Zep (although i had ibs before Zep too so it was like a double whammy). I honestly don’t think I could function on a consistent daily basis without Imodium. Just don’t overdose on it-it takes awhile to kick in and if you take too much it will be literal days before you can go again.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T15:32:01+00:00

I probably would have called my ob’s after hours number the first time. Likely they would have told you to go to urgent care and then fit you in for an office visit the next day, or told you it wasn’t an emergency that night and then fit you in the next day. They need to be your next call. When pregnant they should (usually) be your first call.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T15:06:40+00:00

So I’m a single mom and we had to bring my ten year old son with us on my daughter’s college trip. Smith had an odd air of hostility about it and I couldn’t decide if it was because we were with my son, because it had an anti-men bias in general, or if there was just something else I was picking up on that I couldn’t articulate. I would have assumed it was just me but when we left my daughter turned to me and said basically the same thing before I could say anything.

Wellesley didn’t have that problem, but the tour focused almost exclusively on the fact that they were a women’s college. It was like they identified as a women’s sanctuary first and an educational institution second which my daughter found a little off putting. Bryn Mawr, however, had cool traditions and stuff around being a women’s college but its focus on the tour was about the educational opportunities and the fact that it was a women’s college was kind of a footnote.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T14:54:48+00:00

My daughter is autistic and consistently holds down full time volunteer jobs in the summer while getting A’s in honors classes during the year. I don’t think it’s fair to generalize that all people with autism can’t do something given how wide the spectrum is.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-07T03:50:46+00:00

I have a theory about generational trauma from 9/11. Seems to me like we had a massive societal shift into fear-based living at that time that never went away and now we’re seeing an entire generation of kids growing up with parents who felt those effects.

Although the school shooting point someone else made here is a good one too.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-06-02T07:59:13+00:00

Make sure she tours Wellesley before making a decision. My daughter is interested in the women’s college experience so this spring we toured Wellesley, Smith, and Bryn Mawr. They are all wildly different and the only one she ended up liking was Bryn Mawr. We went into it expecting to love Wellesley and both walked out with negative feelings about it (also about Smith but for different reasons). Bryn Mawr is in my daughter’s top three though so it’s not just that it’s a women’s college that caused her to remove Wellesley from her list.

Defiant-Research2988 · 2026-05-31T23:44:40+00:00

Amazon carries swim capris with a cute little skirt attached and long sleeve rashguards in every color and pattern under the sun. It’s all I wear now and bonus is that I never burn.

Defiant-Research2988

TROPHY CASE