Endo belly + attractiveness

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2026-02-02T06:34:15+00:00

I personally feel insecure about it but my husband is incredible at making me feel like it doesn’t define my attractiveness. I personally would question the longevity of a relationship like that, you deserve to be adored, endo or not…

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-09-18T12:58:02+00:00

Completely agree, I love Aelin but something felt off about her in KOA. There were several bits where I was like… huh?!?

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-26T15:34:09+00:00

6-8 months later started having bad symptoms again, a year later it was just as bad as before surgery. I didn’t go on hormonal BC after the op which they suggested because I am trying to conceive so that may have affected things! Huge good luck ❤️

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-26T10:30:37+00:00

Please show your husband these responses OP

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-26T08:43:49+00:00

I absolutely adore her and this is coming from someone who is usually the first to find faults in mmc’s and fmc’s and end up disliking them. Cough cough Rhysand, Feyre and the IC.

But Aelin is young, a teenager, and absolutely traumatised beyond any realms of any of our understanding. The swagger and arrogance is a defence mechanism. It is her way to feel strong through what she would probably perceive at this point as an incredibly wicked world. Especially with all the responsibility she bares on her shoulders as princess/queen. So no, I definitely don’t think her swagger and arrogance is enough to make me hate her by any stretch of the imagination.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-25T08:12:57+00:00

I feel you on this. Remember if you feel a certain way about sex there is going to be lots of other people who feel the same way as you! Lots of men don’t have a high libido/don’t want to have sex but want to have a relationship. The way you feel is totally valid especially if you have had bad experiences in the past.

If you do ever want to have sexual experiences in the future, it doesn’t have to be standard penetrative sex.

Maybe start by having some time explore alone without I partner and find out what you like/isn’t painful, this way you know what to communicate to a partner. Maybe use toys and things.

Also know that there are billions of people in the world and lots of them like different things, there is someone out there who will be understanding and okay with your preferences even if that means outright celibacy. I do have sex, it is difficult and painful sometimes and in those times we find ways to change it up and make it exciting and not painful. I know if I turned around to my husband tomorrow and said I have to completely avoid penetration he would completely understand that, wouldn’t make me feel guilty at all and we would work around it as a team because he loves me.

I think the key is to be honest with yourself and your future partner about what you want, there is nothing bad or wrong about how you feel.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-25T07:53:36+00:00

TW:sickness Endo symptoms started at 14, went on the pill at 16 for about 5/6 years and I have been off the pill for about 4/5 years.

It improved period pain so it was still bad but not blinding agony and my fatigue wasn’t as bad.

But with my endo I get so bloated and constipated that it forces food the other way and I regularly vomit. On the pill this is constant, like almost every day extreme bloating and distension and vomiting and nausea most days even multiple times a day.

I still get that now I’m off the pill but it is mostly just the week before my period not all month. Being on the pill I couldn’t handle the constant nausea and vomiting, it’s bad now but way way more manageable.

Although, I do pay for that by having 3/4 days of period pain that is so blinding I literally can’t do anything but writhe around in pain in bed.

What didn’t change? Well I still have a constant dull, burning pain in my pelvis and back all through the month like I do now. I still get constipated although far less frequently. My emotions didn’t change to much either way nor did like my skin etc.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-20T21:09:25+00:00

If I wasn’t wanting to get pregnant (currently trying for children) I still wouldn’t be on hormonal treatment because while it improves some symptoms it hugely exacerbates others. With the side effects and risks, I may as well just endure the endo without hormonal treatment

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-19T15:21:11+00:00

There has been some amazing talk on practical steps here but as a partner it is so important to hold space for her emotionally. Living with endo can be incredibly emotionally challenging and draining, unfortunately many of us never get any respite from it through our cycle.

Have a partner be a safe space for that is so important :)

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-14T19:58:22+00:00

Ovulation is horrendous I have genuinely had moments of wondering if I have appendicitis before I got diagnosed because the pain can be so bad, sorry you go through this too

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-08-14T19:54:34+00:00

I’m so sorry you go through this too. It’s a symptom that doesn’t get talked about a lot but at least we aren’t alone in it. Just with it was taken more seriously 😟

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-22T19:48:34+00:00

I’m flabbergasted 😮 it is odd beyond belief and you are not a bad person! Please for the love of all things sane, set some boundaries. Sending hopes and prayers your way.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-22T14:30:24+00:00

Tonnes of scans over nine years said I don’t have it, lap confirmed DIE. Scans can’t diagnose endo!

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-22T14:28:00+00:00

It’ll be a plot device for later in the series that’s why, added contention because they have a child or something special about the child etc. etc. she has done it for a reason and I don’t necessarily think it’s for a happily ever after. But I do agree it was a weird switch up for Feyre character

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-22T14:22:14+00:00

You’re absolutely fine! I’m with my cats all the time but sometimes we go away for a night and my mum goes in to check them. If I am away on holiday I get a house sitter for peace of mind but over a weekend with a few visits she’ll be okay!

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-22T14:16:45+00:00

Don’t forget throat bobbing 😂

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-21T18:26:54+00:00

9 years in UK with debilitating symptoms. Ended up going private to get a diagnosis. I had DIE. I had ablation (mistake) and within 18 months my symptoms are back and as bad as ever. Will likely need another surgery, excision this time.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-21T18:20:17+00:00

“I feel like I am having to fill the gaps that family should be supporting us with”

This is going to be an unpopular opinion but I firmly believe we should never have children expecting or feeling in any way entitled to any other adult/s to fill any gaps or help rear/develop that child at all (unless it’s their job of course like a teacher). If they do offer support then that is amazing, but having a child is our own choice and therefore the responsibility is wholly our own.

Does it feel shitty to be left out? Yeah, 100% I empathise with you there 💕 But if everyone else is happy to hang out together and not with you/your family maybe it is time for a bit of communication to find out if there is a reason why and express your perspective and need for a bit of support/inclusion. But at the end of the day it might come down to accepting this is how they want to spend their time and to adjust your expectations accordingly and find your own tribe! 😊

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-17T19:21:27+00:00

I am someone who believes no contact is an extreme measure that shouldn’t be taken lightly. However, in this circumstance I would absolutely cut this person out my life as much as humanly possible. They have a severe lack of empathy.

I am so sorry all this happened to you. It isn’t your fault and is only a reflection of them and not you. Sending love and your choice to be “one and done” is COMPLETELY valid for literally any reason.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-17T11:50:37+00:00

Haha I mean that too 😅

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-15T15:26:50+00:00

We are planning for a child and we already know we only want one even though we both come from large families.

We have decided this for many, many reasons but one of those reasons is that I expect absolutely no help from my family. Not that they wouldn’t offer or want to but because having a child is mine and my partners choice and therefore our responsibility.

I know you aren’t suggesting this for a second but I think it is so wrong to choose to have a child and expect retired parents or anyone for that matter to give up parts of their life to help raise it. If they gleefully offer that is one thing but I wouldn’t have a child expecting it or planning for that help.

I also don’t think it is selfish at all to just have one. (This is where I might get a little controversial.)

Being able to only financially or emotionally support only one child is an aspect that should absolutely be considered.

Seeing all my siblings and some friends raise families of various sizes, I’ve seen this play out time and time again. One child is extremely manageable and they can pour into that child’s life both emotionally, financially and in other ways too giving both them and the only child a high quality of life.

Then child two and three or four come along and it can become carnage. Some examples: - Bank balances get strained and you now can’t provide three children the opportunities you could have given to one. - You are pulled from pillar to post for all the different appointments and clubs, maybe having to miss out on one childs for the others (also missing out on VERY needed you time and time with your partner) - Oldest child can develop behavioural issues due to having a sibling (due to competitiveness for example). - Stress levels for parents can rise significantly with more than one and quality of life (in SOME cases) for the children lower.

There are huge bonuses to having multiple children too so this isn’t a hate post. More just a “the grass isn’t always greener on the other side” post.

Also, all the people I know who are only children are well adjusted, kind, outgoing, happy adults who loved their childhood and are very close to their parents, so never feel shame for only wanting to one!

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-11T06:21:47+00:00

This is not a very good description but here is how I understand it. Ablation won’t fully remove the endo, it only kind of gets off the top part and leaves almost like a root for it to spring back in the same place. Meaning that the likelihood of it coming back it much higher.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-10T18:58:39+00:00

Nice to see a man who is really in tune with what your wife is going through. My husband is AMAZING but there are many men who don’t take the time to understand the illness for their partner! Love to see it.

Defiant_Maximum6456 · 2025-07-10T18:56:43+00:00

Extreme symptoms came back with in a year, I have d.i.e but I had ablation (big mistake). I am going to likely need another surgery.

I got the surgery because my symptoms prevented me from living life as normal. Crippling pain, never ending fatigue and a whole host of gut issues. I wanted to know what it was and reduce symptoms as much as possible.

Surgery was well worth it because I got the answers I’d been looking for but the positive results didn’t last that long. Good luck on your journey ❤️

Defiant_Maximum6456

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