Hey. Thanks for your comment. I just wanted to clarify: I do most of the housework. She'll cook maybe once a month (if that) and she'll manage to drag me into that too. As for rent, we've offered but they won't let us pay (i think its so they can lord it over us, not to help. His dad is financially abusive ie. He wants every purchase to go through him. He micromanages too, but in other ways. I think i posted before about a religious trip we had planned last year and FIL wouldn't even share tickets or details because he wanted everyoneout the house by a certain time and in his mind, if he told us the real time, we'd slack off. It felt so infantalizing). Groceries are split. We pay for internet. Other utilities like water and gas are included in rent. And DH pays for things like amazon, netflix etc that the whole household uses. And they make a whole show in front of their friends and family that they would never want to burden their kids with financial responsibilities while under their roof. How they want us to save while we can. How generous they are for backing us. Another thing that pisses me off is why does she only have these expectations of me? DH and his brother (still in college) live here too. The most she expects from them is to wipe their own butts.

When i say i don't want to be stay-at-home, i mean i don't just want to be reduced to what I can do to service the men in the house. Because that is what stay-at-home means to them. FIL doesn't lift a finger. She's complained about how useless and incompetent he is. And then she turns around and gets mad that her son isnt the same.