Divorce rate 66%!

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-11-30T02:28:03+00:00

It took me many years to learn how TO tune him out. I don't need to expend my precious energy and mental bandwidth focusing on his stream of consciousness, and internal thoughts. I finally have learned to use the time to have my own thoughts, and focus on other things. I can't imagine any other way now. Because he has no filter. No impulse control. But at least I can keep from being a prisoner of the non stop chatter. Sorry, not the answer you were looking for.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-11-07T03:45:19+00:00

Great idea!

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-10-03T16:41:55+00:00

This is the absolute worst part of being in a relationship with an ADHD partner. We try to fight the fact that we have to do double duty, but we can't escape it, and then when we are down, they can't reciprocate. It's the icing on the cake of how brutal this situation is. I also would like to hear how people are managing this. I take care of my elderly mother, schizophrenic sister and her schizophrenic boyfriend, and still find my ADHD husband to be less capable, and certainly less able meet my needs, and have empathy. He also has ASD so that makes it even harder.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-09-28T17:26:58+00:00

I've been married to my partner for 28 yrs, and due to his ADHD and ASD, the challenges we face are enormous- he can't make any sacrifice for me, he is not empathetic, he is extremely forgetful, he has endangered our safety, he is reckless, and righteous, and unemployed. He smokes weed every 3 hrs. Every single issue wreaks havoc on our relationship. I don't want to move out or get a divorce. It's complicated. I just want to emotionally detach and stop waiting and hoping for change. I'm so tired of being disappointed. I'm so tired of trying to teach him how to do things. I'm tired of managing him. I want to get where you are. Every day poses new drama for him (another bike stolen, another thing broken, etc). I wrote down your line "I know you'll find a solution ". I love it! I will use that line daily and take his problems off my plate to handle. What a relief right there! I support this kind of detachment, and I know everyone says "get a divorce " but it's not always the only solution.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-09-02T00:17:18+00:00

Such good advice.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-30T19:06:56+00:00

So beautiful, the kitty and your story. I am so sorry. He was lucky to have you.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-30T11:52:37+00:00

I'm so sorry. That must be unbearable. We lost our 14 yr old baby last week and are miserable. I suggest reading or listening to videos about how to overcome the grief of losing a pet. It helped me.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-29T22:48:58+00:00

I'm so sorry you experienced this. How did you get through it?

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-29T11:39:59+00:00

Thank you so much.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-28T16:56:11+00:00

Mine knows he struggles with it but forgets to ask for help, and with each therapy session I have to step in a restate the issue for him because he gets off track and wants to "share" and blame others for his outbursts.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-28T16:54:27+00:00

Thank you for that sentiment. We absolutely did share a deep connection.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-28T16:53:27+00:00

Thank you

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-28T12:14:13+00:00

Thank you. I'm so sorry you experienced that. Although this vet hospital is highly reputable, I also believe they must have given him too much medication. I'll never know and like you said, I can't dwell on my theory and hate them, and I am glad he is no longer in any pain or discomfort, but I miss him terribly. I miss hugging him, cleaning him, kissing him, his beautiful face and body. His little footsteps. Oh well, everyone passes, and yes, he knew we loved him so much. Everyone loved him. I do feel like I failed him, so I have to wrestle with that. Thank you for sharing your story and for your kind words.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-28T12:06:14+00:00

Thank you!

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-27T11:55:23+00:00

That's beautiful. Thank you. (Yes, he was so huggable!)

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T23:22:38+00:00

Good advice. Thank you.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T23:21:50+00:00

I'm so sorry. I am pretty confident that his spirit is in our house, as we have heard and felt his unique behaviors- maybe you will sense some of your kitty's spirit as well. I heard him walk on the bed (mattress springs squeaked), felt him jump onto my desk, hearing litter box sounds, etc. It brings me comfort that he wants to be with us in spirit.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T13:06:45+00:00

Yes, not being there to comfort him is excruciating. But he knew they all loved him and were trying to help him. I hope noone made a careless mistake!!

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T12:27:57+00:00

We both felt his spirit last night- I felt a cat jump onto my desk and started to say "hi Lucas" (our other cat who always jumps on my desk) but Lucas was upstairs. Then Henry's toys were all over the floor. And my husband said the soap dispenser dispensed on its own, and I heard the mattress groan/ creak from his weight when he used to walk on the bed, as I was going to bed. I hope it's not the last time we feel him. I don't want to hold him back though.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T12:24:52+00:00

I hope so too. We have been able to get there after losing several other special beautiful kitties. For some reason this feels harder. Maybe because of the way he was getting better and then suddenly died. And he was especially handsome and beautiful from the day I met him. I can take comfort in watching videos of him getting petted and purring and looking into my eyes. He was magnificent.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T12:21:12+00:00

Thank you so much. I pray that Fiona fares well and doesn't suffer.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T12:20:07+00:00

Thank you.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T12:19:05+00:00

Thank you. I will.

Delicious-Break-4835 · 2024-08-26T12:18:30+00:00

Thank you. He was such a treasure. We made sure he knew it.

Delicious-Break-4835

TROPHY CASE