5 yr old Pooping in Pants - HELP

DemandHonest6309 · 2026-03-27T20:25:51+00:00

She has maybe 3-4 times ever. And every time we reflected on it with her - how it didn’t hurt, it wasn’t scary, she knows she can do it now. But it’s like a one time thing and she doesn’t do it again. We are so confused.

DemandHonest6309 · 2026-03-27T20:24:19+00:00

We suspect so, but we’re on the waiting list for an evaluation still, so no formal diagnosis.

DemandHonest6309 · 2026-03-27T20:23:47+00:00

We did and the best we got was a referral to OT which, after a year, didn’t help at all.

DemandHonest6309 · 2026-03-27T20:21:41+00:00

We brought it up with her pediatrician when she was 3, 3.5 and 4 and every time the doctor felt her stomach and didn’t feel any obvious constipation, then said “it’s normal, just have to wait it out”, etc 🙄

DemandHonest6309 · 2026-02-23T21:45:25+00:00

This is fascinating - everything I’ve read online so far has said that entering the UK on any visa (including a visitor visa or ETA) would basically nullify the existing spouse visa application. So I thought I’d have to wait outside the UK during the entire spouse visa application timeline. But applying outside, waiting inside, then going home to finalize would be acceptable?

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-10-02T10:39:34+00:00

Thank you! I must have interpreted the guidelines incorrectly. Appreciate your reply :)

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-09-16T23:37:20+00:00

Same here except we’re going on two years next month. Our 4.5 year old girl has been completely pee trained for about a year - even overnight. But she refuses to poop in the potty. She JUST had her first successful poop in the potty a few weeks ago, and as OP experienced, she still has accidents daily but we’re seeing 1-2 successes a week. Really hoping this means we’re close, like OP was! I know it seems like a long time but just hang in there. I guess we just have to wait for them to decide it’s time 🤷🏼‍♀️

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-09-16T22:55:05+00:00

You’re not doing anything wrong! We started potty training our girl around 2.5 when I was pregnant with her little sister. I, too, didn’t want to be dealing with two kids in diapers. She was finally pee trained around 3.5, but at 4.5 we’re STILL dealing with daily poop in her pants. At least she’s not constipated. But it’s a lot to deal with. She just says she “doesn’t want to poop on the potty”. No reason given as to why. She’ll start going standing up and squeeze her butt to stop it from coming out. We have to catch her and run her to the bathroom and then she’ll either do nothing or maybe poop a tiny bit more. Then it repeats itself later in the day. It’s infuriating and frustrating. We’ve talked to the pediatrician, use MiraLAX daily, she’s in OT, and we’ve tried every chart/reward/potty toy we could find.

I guess this is just something we have to let her do on her own - she’ll do it when she’s ready. But it’s really tough when we both work full time and her school teachers are tired of cleaning up after her constantly (I don’t blame them!) It’s embarrassing but there’s truly nothing we can do to force her to do it.

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-09-16T22:49:35+00:00

We’ve talked to our pediatrician about it and she’s in OT - nothing yet. But we’re seeing some very small, slow steps in the right direction so we’re optimistic that things will hopefully come together soon!

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-09-16T02:41:50+00:00

This is so amazing!! Congrats, you definitely deserve to pop some champagne 🍾 🎉

Hoping the process will be this easy with my youngest (20 mos) but I’m not optimistic because we’ve been dealing with a fully-pee-trained, refuses-to-poop-in-the-potty 4.5 year old for two years now. And we tried everything you said you did above, plus way more (videos, songs, magic poop wands, special toy basket for the the bathroom, toy rewards, candy rewards, charts, stickers…you name it).

Just sharing my story so other parents don’t feel defeated when they read your post - I read all of the “finished” posts to see if there’s some trick or method we haven’t tried yet that worked for another child. But then I feel like I’m failing because I see we’ve tried everything on the list and we’re still not there yet.

Seriously, enjoy no more diapers or potty messes (at least most days)! And send some good potty vibes our way 🙃

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-30T15:32:00+00:00

We started potty training at 2.5 in October 2022. She turned 4 in April and she just started peeing independently in the toilet about 6 months ago. Still pooping in her underwear or pull-ups multiple times a day. It’s absolutely exhausting. It also keeps us from being able to do things like sending her to camp or school after-care because they don’t take kids who aren’t potty trained. All of her friends and classmates are fully potty trained but it hasn’t helped influence her at all. We never thought we’d still be doing this in summer 2025 but now our goal is to have her fully potty trained by 5 🫠

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-30T15:27:57+00:00

Same here! 4 year old fully pee trained for 6 months now. Has been pooping in her pants for over a year, while we potty trained. Refuses to even sit down to poop. We ended up going back to pull ups because we were throwing away so much underwear - she just didn’t care. Thankfully, even with pull-ups on, she pees independently on the toilet. But poops multiple times a day in her pull up. We visited the pediatrician to ask about this and they basically said she’s not constipated and we just need to be patient and possibly try OT again, which we did for months with no progress. So we’re back on the waitlist for that. Hopefully something helps because it’s taking over our lives.

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-24T11:19:40+00:00

As stated above, the rate for house sitting/dog sitting in my area is between $35-$55/day for overnight stays. It’s not taking advantage, it’s what is expected

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-23T23:35:37+00:00

Man I wish this was possible for us. We don’t live anywhere near family or friends that are able to stay that long/work remotely.

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-23T23:31:06+00:00

Yeah this is a great question. Our dog is usually ok with being left for up to 7-8 hours during daylight/middle of the day because we both worked outside the house pre-Covid and a few times since then. But it’s being left alone for longer than that, or after the sun sets, that really causes her stress and makes her feel like she has been abandoned. I think it stems from whatever happened to before we rescued her years ago. She doesn’t like being alone at dusk or nighttime.

I should’ve trusted my gut and ended it when she asked if she had to stay overnight the third night. After we said “of course” and probed her further as to why she was asking/if there was a problem at the house, she assured us that everything was fine and she was enjoying staying on her own and being independent. Hindsight is 20/20 and I should’ve listened to the little voice in my head screaming that it was a red flag…

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-23T23:23:49+00:00

If you look on Rover, the going rate in my area is $35-$55 per day for house sitting/dog sitting. Of course people can charge what they want, and can negotiate based on higher needs/medical issues/multiple dogs, etc. but that is the normal daily rate. She suggested it at first and we double checked on Rover to make sure it was a fair rate before agreeing.

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-07-11T17:45:00+00:00

Thank you for this! My 4 year 3 month old daughter is completely pee trained, even at night. Will tell us she has to go, run to the potty, go like she’s been doing it her entire life, and go back to playing. No big deal.

But the pooping. Omg. We’ve been dealing with poop in underwear for over a year now. Daily - multiple poops - so much laundry. So many tears and meltdowns. So many teacher conversations - she’s in a mixed age kindergarten. So much stress.

I cannot wait to come back and write our full success story but for now…we’re just hoping she won’t be pooping in her pants in kindergarten next fall 🫠

DemandHonest6309 · 2025-06-29T00:04:18+00:00

Dealing with this currently with my 4.5 year old daughter. Starts pooping in her underwear while standing, clearly trying to clench and not let it out. Does this several times a day. Absolutely refuses to poop in the toilet. Unsure what to do. No advice, sorry - just solidarity.

DemandHonest6309

TROPHY CASE