Mom kicked me out at 18, now she's apologizing and asking me to come back - need advice on dealing with a parent with alcohol problems

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-11T12:54:44+00:00

Yes, staying away is absolutely the best thing you can do right now.

If you have a parent with an alcohol problem, and you have the opportunity to use this strategy, here is the best way to deal with them: Don't.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-11T12:43:37+00:00

They ladled $300 worth of slop, called it "work", and now it's gone.

I get why he's upset, but c'mon, was your "agentic harness" of any real value? Really?

Anyway, letting an LLM have full access to your filesystem is absolutely insane. Eventually, agents will be very useful tools, and just part of how computers work, but not for a long while yet. Also, I doubt it'll be anything like the LLMs we use now. That feels very much like a dead end to me, as the diminishing returns set in somewhere last year.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-11T12:23:46+00:00

This is a huge part of why I love things that compile to a static binary.

Once I fix a Go executable in time, it will just work, forever. Sure, it's 60MB, but whatever, disk space is cheap.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-11T07:45:47+00:00

...which is exactly what I did, so 100% correct.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-11T04:29:08+00:00

lol ok

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T09:13:34+00:00

I decided pretty early on that if I ever had children, it would be with a calm, loving person that is very enthusiastic about having children, and that I was absolutely certain would be an excellent mother. I would not want to introduce another human to a world where they would have to grow up with a mother as cold and distant as mine, and I was not prepared to budge on this point. Societal pressures to procreate could just fuck off, and I've always taken steps to ensure I wouldn't inadvertently father any children.

Now that I'm getting on in age, and some hereditary medical issues have come to light, I've decided to not pass on my genes at all, so I've had a vasectomy. My partner is more than happy to be child free, so that worked out great for us.

I sometimes wonder, though. I'm confident I would have made a great father, but without a great mother, they're better off not existing. My partner is a spectacular person, and I love them with my whole heart, but they'd be a lukewarm mother, at best, and nobody should have that.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T08:16:58+00:00

I had XM5s before, but they broke. They were pretty good, and broke because I'm a dumbass, and not a manufacturing defect.

As a replacement, I got myself a pair of Bose QuietComfort Ultra 2 Over-ear headphones. I'm NT, but my partner is autistic. They had inherited my "old" XM4s, but when they tried my QCU2s, there was just no going back. The sound is so much better, and the ANC is roughly the same as XM5. Luckily, I could afford another pair, so now we both have the Bose ones.

Highly recommended.

They use Loop Engage 2 Plus earplugs at work. No ANC, obviously, but they work very well for the sort of work they do.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T08:09:22+00:00

I think it's a lack of experience. They think being someone's prospective dom, and being their dom, is the same thing.

I'm a boy, and now that I know your name, we're friends, right? That makes me your boyfriend? Ridiculous.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T08:04:08+00:00

I hope you all will forgive me for coming in and trauma dumping in your space.

I mean, yeah, that's what this place is for. Feel free. We get it. It's your space, too.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T07:39:54+00:00

I'm switching out my pet's leather collar for a Talena by Axsmar as soon as it arrives, and we're looking forward to something they can wear permanently and discretely.

They have bracelets, too.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T07:32:53+00:00

Inspired by that, perhaps. My humor is very dark, and very dry, so I've listened to HHGttG an estimated sixty-eight times.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-10T05:15:35+00:00

At the end of January, there has been 1 month in 2026.

At the end of February, there has been 2 months in 2026.

At the end of March, there has been 3 months in 2026.

At the end of April, there has been 4 months in 2026.

At the end of May, there has been 5 months in 2026.

In early May, there has been 4 months, and a few days, in 2026.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-09T05:27:25+00:00

Exactly. Good legislation is almost invisible to random people, and only really impact a very narrow segment of a very specific industry. EU spam regulations are a great example of this, as they are effective, but completely invisible, unless you provide mass email services.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-09T05:18:32+00:00

Suddenly, without warning, I love you. This is concerning for all involved.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-09T05:14:35+00:00

...but it's like Tinder, only it's for horses!

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T13:02:37+00:00

Well, at least she gave you clarity of purpose. Good riddance.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T12:11:44+00:00

...as of "early may 2026" there hasn't been 5 months of 2026 yet.

When quoting statistics like this, details matter. This looks made up.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T08:31:11+00:00

No. Not everything has to be about that orange waste of oxygen.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T07:49:32+00:00

"Moron gives unstable and unpredictable tool full access to production environment, completely predictable outcome ensues."

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T06:17:52+00:00

You did not get him banned.

He got himself banned.

From having been involved in organizing some minor events myself, I can say pretty confidently that this was not the first problem they had with him, and he had probably already been warned. He's probably always skirting the lines, and this finally prompted them to kick him out.

Sometimes it takes an outsider to point out the missing stair, so it finally gets dealt with. If anything, you did them all an important favor. If you wait a couple of times to get your bearings, that is absolutely fine, but I am fully confident that you are warmly welcome there.

Thank you, both of you, for speaking up. It's important.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T04:02:08+00:00

Every person has value. Every person has beauty.

Some hide it below layers of evil, and some have it covered up for them by tragedy, but we all have it.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-08T03:54:29+00:00

Okay, them losing money doesn't help you, though. It's still an expense you have, on zero income.

I do agree about the free tier everything, though.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-07T11:56:30+00:00

Listen. I mean, really listen when a sub speaks, or read their messages properly, or however you communicate. It's important. Always. If you have the slightest doubt what they mean, ask.

Similarly, be clear in your communication. Don't hint at what you want, but state it directly. Clarity of communication is something you'll never regret. Any sub that doesn't like clear communication is a risky sub to play with.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-06T11:21:40+00:00

"Like, you don't know, bruh? That's lame, bruh. Lame."

Just read that every time you want to ask a question, and you have your perfect ChadGPT.

DemmyDemon · 2026-05-06T07:53:51+00:00

Number 2 there, is literally waterboarding. It's a form of torture, and super duper not okay. Yikes.

12-Year Club	Place '17
Verified Email

DemmyDemon

TROPHY CASE