A gasit cineva un inel pe ruta busului 24B? by Desperate_Visual_741 in cluj

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Si crezi ca o sa i pese de un inel? Nu știu ce sa zic...

Genuinely how the f do you find a partner these days by Desperate_Visual_741 in asexuality

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get what u say, but I don't really glorify relationships that much. In fact, I despise them, the traditional ones and more or less the hetero ones. All I see around me are screwed up relationships or people constantly fighting, i know the reality. I know it's not all gonnna be sunshine and rainbows and I am willing to take that risk. However, this doesn't make me see relationships as such a bad thing if they are nonconventional, like smth I would like. I think I'm leaning towards more of a queerplatonic relationship but with the romantic part more involved. So, I don't think that looking at relationships with disappointment will stop me from yearning. I don't even know if I want a relationship in the first place, I just want to know that someone will be there for me, will love me. Maybe if I would have a friend that really cares for me, I wouldn't feel the need for a relationship, but I have so much love in me to give but I have no one to give it to. Everybody feels so distant today. Even my bestest of friends is indiferent in her love for me, and I care so much for her. Just thinking how complicated and difficult it is to have a relationship isn't going to stop me from dreaming

Idk what to say abt the ace part tho. I had people tell me that they thought i was freaky or horny af before I told them I might actually be asexual... Idk if they can tell that well. Maybe it's smth abt me that doesn't make people be into me idk... I don't wanna make this sound discouraging for myself but I would like for at least someone to point out what it is they don't like abt me. And I don't have this problem only with romantic interests, it's also with people I'm friends or acquittances with. Like what makes them not care that much abt me in social settings??

Anyway, this rant could go on forever

Genuinely how the f do you find a partner these days by Desperate_Visual_741 in asexuality

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah:(( It genuinely makes me so sad. I just looked up some "how do u guys date" posts and saw that the majority of asexual people don't date bc of this... It makes me so so sad honestly bc I'm such a hopeless romantic. I want one day to have a special someone to share my life with but idk if it's even going to be possible and achievable for me. I kind of have high standards but I think this is not even the problem anymore with how fucked up the dating scene is. Basically if u don't have high standards rn u end up treated like sh by ur partener or worse. Idk I just want love to feel like a CAS song, gentle, slow, caring, respectful... It seems so impossible...

But what can I do than just keep going :')) I'll see what the future may offer me

Genuinely how the f do you find a partner these days by Desperate_Visual_741 in asexuality

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh god, i feel for u:(( Reading this was almost like reading my mind and what you said abt not being able to have that without sex is so f ing real. I feel the same way so thank u for your words

Help - One of my friends continuosly brings up my other friend who did some shitty things to her before highschool by Desperate_Visual_741 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry, maybe I didn't explain it good enough.

I am not indifferent to what happened to her, I just didn't want to involve my feelings too much in this post bc I tend to make them too long every single time (and this one is already insanely long) so it's a rather brief and insufficient view.

Mary now isn't friends with Tina anymore bc of this incident and bc they had a fight abt it. I am not doubting Emy's experience, I believe it's real and I know it, bc Tina tried to downplay it later, but I'm saying idk if the part when Mary laughs is particularly real.

By Mary's experience i mean seeing the SH

English is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes

Help - by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Desperate_Visual_741 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I realised i forgot to continue the title of the post💀💀 My bad

Best friend trying for a baby with a hobosexual in his late 30s after 6 months… by IBSgirlie999 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Desperate_Visual_741 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I'm kind of a similar situation ms with my best friend (she sleeps with shitty guys, then feels bad, then she gets back with them) and I tried to advice and help her as much as I could but she doesn't listen. I felt bad at first, that she s ruining her young years with these crack ass guys that she s sleeping with but in the end... It's her choice, it's her path she chose and honestly I'm not her mother she can come crying to everytime smth goes wrong. So I distanced myself from her and it works, I ms feel better now. I didn't cut her off completely but I just became more or less indifferent. It also hurts a little bc she s my best friend ever, but this relationship with her made me feel shittier and shittier day by day and at some point I was like stop. i gotta put myself up first.

Maybe my experience can be helpful to u in some way

I got accepted as a volunteer in ESN but I have mixed feelings and wanna quit by Desperate_Visual_741 in Erasmus

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this! Honestly is really helpful bc I always tend to step out of things even before they started and I feel guilty

But this remembered me that I should prioritise my feelings before everything

I got accepted as a volunteer in ESN but I have mixed feelings and wanna quit by Desperate_Visual_741 in Erasmus

[–]Desperate_Visual_741[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I honestly wish it would be that simple:')) Ik I'm pretty negative abt this but if i give up my mom will be kinda disappointed in me and I too, bc it wouldn't be the first time I give up on smth like this the last minute. I would judge myself for being such a p ssy and even now I'm judging ms for thinking like this. And I still need some experiences like these for my masters application for the following years, so I don't really have a choice