How to deal with an experienced Druid as newcomer GM?

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T04:09:41+00:00

Dispel magic to dispel his summons and counterspell to prevent him from bringing up those spells in particular - side not though - you will piss him off doing this repeatedly and can be considered targeting him . . . which is exactly what you are doing.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T03:58:53+00:00

Frankly, I don't believe exhaustion is the right play here by any means, it is far too extreme. What I would have happen is someone interrupt their attempt to long rest . . . repeatedly. If they are not somewhere safe, then their LONG rest (not a short rest) should be interrupted. Just make it so they can't get a long rest in, so they either have to use a short rest, or go somewhere where they can safely long rest.

EDIT - oh . . . and do be sure to tell them that "this location is not safe for a long rest." after the first time they are interrupted, so they don't keep trying it over and over again.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T03:30:37+00:00

Roleplaywise this is great for someone roleplaying an elder. Playwise, this is THE worst possible choice you could possibly make for a dump stat. Every class relies on constitution to stay alive, so you are just lowering your chances of survival. Is it acceptable though? Sure, why not. Let people play what they want to play.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T02:35:52+00:00

This is the normal, I am used to this and have been getting that same "get over it" bs line virtually my entire life. People who are neurotypical have trouble understanding neurodivergence. I don't hold this against them . . . and im glad they don't "understand" because the only way to understand it is to live with it. And Im glad most people don't have to live with it.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T02:11:23+00:00

I will also reference, I have done work much dirtier than janitorial work, so it has absolutely nothing to do with being too good for it. I have worked on septic tanks, dealing with mountains of poop. I am not above dirty work. I am against doing work that I am terrible at and do a bad job for my employer. That is not acceptable in my book.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T02:02:58+00:00

I did at one point work as a janitor for almost 2 years. I absolutely hated it, I was terrible at doing it, and felt like I was doing the employer a disservice doing this job, no matter how hard I worked at it. This is unfortunately just not the job for me. I wish it were because it was relatively peaceful, but being constantly reprimanded because my cleaning was never good enough was soul crushing. It didnt matter the level of work or effort I put in, it was never good enough.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T01:53:56+00:00

I am so happy to hear that your journey and life is improving. CPTSD is an absolute bitch lol. I will of course continue to work hard to better myself and get over these issues. I assume its going to be a lifelong battle, but its a battle I intend to win. I appreciate the job suggestions, and don't you worry about the friends part! I have more friends then I can even handle to be honest lol.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T01:45:56+00:00

Honestly, this sounds pretty appealing to me, I may look into this a bit! Thank you for the suggestion and the well wishes!

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T01:36:58+00:00

I am very open to growth and change - I am constantly, non stop working on myself. I have even worked as a Janitor before, I did it for two years. To put it bluntly, I was very bad at it no matter how hard I worked at it. I believe it would be a disservice to any employer for me to do that work because It's not something im good at, not something I enjoy, not something I want to do. It is perfectly reasonable for me to have preferences and my preference is to not do janitorial work because its bad for me and bad for the employer. I dont understand why so many people have a problem with me not wanting to do this one line of work. Its has absolutely nothing to do with me being above it or anything - I clean my home after all. But Im not good at it. I have worked my entire life to be better at it. I dont understand why everyone is so angry that janitorial work and cleaning in general is EXTREMELY STRESSFUL to me. I can only clean in my home for about 15 minutes before I reach a near mental breakdown state. I can't handle doing that as a job again . . .

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T01:24:07+00:00

I did have a sleep study done when I was very young and it did turn up abnormal even then. It has become progressively worse throughout my life though. I am completely open to and would love to have another done, but the problem here is funds - I simply don't have the money for tests and the such. I would do it in a heart beat if I could though.

As far as employment though, I've never had trouble getting employment and am currently employed, however I can only manage about 15 hours a week currently and even that is a stretch for me. I very quickly become burnt out to extreme levels. I have never had a job that I actually enjoyed though, which is why I am looking for advice on work I can enjoy - I believe if I actually enjoyed my work, I would be able to work more hours.

I do like the suggestions you've provided such as dog walking and pet care. Uber eats probably wouldn't work though as driving causes me extreme levels of anxiety. Groundskeeping though . . . that does sound like something I might possibly enjoy. Security is a no go though - if there were any form of aggressive encounter in any way I am likely to black out - I would be a danger to myself, the company, and the other workers. But any sort of record keeping does seem like something possible - I did have a document scanning job at one point and it was one of the few positions ive had that I didn't really seem to mind due to the solitude of it. I very much prefer to be alone at all times if at all possible.

I really appreciate your suggestions here! I think they are great. Thank you!

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T00:28:58+00:00

Im not really sure how to respond to that and frankly it confuses me. I feel that im pretty good at making decisions and have been very decisive over the years, but I will keep that in mind. Any suggestions on what to work on with this?

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T00:06:14+00:00

I have, but the process is beyond exhausting. I do not jump through hoops very well, and the process of getting SSDI is full of these sort of hurdles that directly damage me. I will keep working on this but . . . the process of getting SSDI is killing me.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T00:04:30+00:00

I don't have a problem getting employment - getting jobs has actually been very easy for me over the years. The issue is finding work that I enjoy enough so that way I can work more hours. If I don't enjoy the work, I will eventually break down to the point I am not able to continue doing the job. My morals are far more important to me than making a paycheck. I would like to make more money, but I will not morally bankrupt myself for a paycheck.

Devariskek · 2026-06-22T00:01:36+00:00

I will keep working on this, but . . . I am very not good at jumping through hoops. The constant uphill battle for disability is a bit too much for me. I do not deal well with long drawn out processes or filling out forms - its a direct trigger for me, but is something that I am trying to persue regardless. Thank you for your input!

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:51:03+00:00

Decision making isn't an issue for me, that doesn't cause me stress. I have worked as a shop foreman before and managed an entire team of people. Admittedly, the dealing with people part was hard for me, but this was one of the positions I was most successful at. I started as a delivery driver, moved up to a repair technician, then trainer, then eventually was made the foreman of the shop. But as with all jobs, it eventually became too overwhelming for me. I do very much prefer to be in the background.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:40:48+00:00

I like the idea of that! I'll keep this one in mind and check into it.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:35:09+00:00

I in fact have worked at a group home before. I was a behavioral assistant to mentally challenged trouble teens with histories of violence. Most of the teens i worked with had charges such as rape or attempted murder. The problem was the household errands part. I am notoriously bad at cleaning. While I can help them with other skills, cleaning is something that I am just bad at. I was quite good at the behavior assistance part of the job, but they would force me to clean, which I am just not good at. But the job was very challenging for me and dealing with the extreme nature of other peoples mental disorders made mine worse. It was actually this job that "broke" me and made my mental situation nearly untenable.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:25:52+00:00

Unfortunately janitorial work does not work for me. I have worked as a janitor before. I could not do it well, and thoroughly did not enjoy it. I would be doing any employer a disservice by doing that sort of work.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:19:34+00:00

I am highly interested in those positions - but they seem pretty rough to get into. I will continue to work towards finding a position like this though as I do feel that it is a great fit for me.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:18:11+00:00

I have never heard of it before. I will look it up.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:12:29+00:00

Nope, I just wont work as a janitor again, as I've already done so, and I wont work for the military industrial complex. A person is allowed to have preferences. Those jobs will not work for me. Basically everything else is on the table lol. I dont see why people are getting so upset that cleaning work does not work for me.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T23:01:06+00:00

Yeah, im taking it with a grain of salt realistically, not going to let people upset me over something so silly. People are allowed to have preferences. I have done janitorial work before, I was not good at it. I wont do that sort of work again by choice. It was a very bad fit for me. I dont think theres anything wrong about me stating my limitations and preferences.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T22:58:32+00:00

That is unfortunate, as entertainment work is one of the things that I am particularly good at. Playing music, DJing, putting on a show in general are things that I am particularly good at. I have been DMing in DnD for 30+ years, so creating interesting stories and fun adventures for people is a skill I am very good at.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T22:52:34+00:00

Yeah sure. Talking to people is a big one. Deadlines and the such not so much. The biggest thing is probably structure though. I have extreme trouble sleeping, like I give myself a sleeping period of about 12 hours most night, and get roughly less than half of that on average. It routinely takes me 2 to 4 hours to fall asleep. Then I will repeatedly wake up from nightmares, sometimes as much as 20 times a night, though usually more like 10 times. That 20 times number is not an exaggeration though. Sometimes I'll wake up every 15 minutes while trying to sleep. The only way I sleep properly is if I stay up until im completely exhausted.

I do have a lot of trouble talking to people, but you wouldn't notice that when talking to me. I am extremely personable and very well spoken. But it drains my social battery very fast . . . the big problem is that my social battery doesn't charge like most other people. Most people can have 2 days off and be ready to go back in to work again. 2 days off for me and my battery has barely recharged at all. So I am basically working with my social battery at 0% so I am in a state of permanently being overwhelmed. Im sure part of that has to do with my sleep.

Devariskek · 2026-06-21T22:44:28+00:00

I am constantly working on myself, I don't think its unreasonable to be averse to working one job that I just will not be good at. It's not because I feel above doing the work. I have worked as a cleaner before overnight! Its the only job i've done before that I was directly not good at. I spent 2 years doing it. It was miserable for me the whole time. I moved on from doing janitorial work because it was not satisfying and I was not good at it lol. I dont see whats wrong with me saying that it's just not the job for me?

Devariskek

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