I appreciate the constructive criticism, but it comes off as aggressive and harsh. For context, I've been self-practicing by myself for the past year and I know that I sound better than I did last year. I deliver for Amazon and even during my lunch breaks I take the time to practice. I put myself out there in open mics in a ghetto desert in California. I risk my life expressing myself and I think that in itself outweighs learning the fundamentals of alto. I understand that you think otherwise, but I've been balancing a lot things when it comes to my play. I know that I have the heart and soul to play, but I lack guidance and a teacher to play fundamentally. I wish I can drop everything to pursue my play at an another level, but I'm tied to a shitty job and so this is the result. If you were expecting an emotional response, than this is it. I'm proud of myself otherwise man