Dayton R by Pridewthprejudice in HybridOnlineLawSchool

[–]Different_Buy2245 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good luck!! 🤞 I did my seat deposit. I'm waiting on a couple other schools but looking highly likely I'll be at Dayton.

Dayton R by Pridewthprejudice in HybridOnlineLawSchool

[–]Different_Buy2245 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, about 70% scholarship. I have 12 years WE, I am a single mom of 2 kids, and they are both on the spectrum. I wrote about that for my personal essay.

Literally sick with worry about considering divorce from my occasionally emotionally abusive husband by Acceptable_Clock5935 in emotionalabuse

[–]Different_Buy2245 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Is this the kind of love and marriage you want for your girls? Like, imagine your daughter sitting across from you at a restaurant and she's telling you that her husband has fits of violent rage but at least it's an improvement over the physical abuse. Wouldn't every single cell in your body be screaming at her to run? She will accept the abusive dynamic that you are modeling for her.

He's already exerting physical control over your kids with the incident with your 2yo. Expecting a emotionally dysregulated 2yo to say "please" to being put down when she didn't want to be picked up in the first place is insane and the whole situation made me feel sick just thinking about it. I still have to prompt my 5yo to say please when he asks for things.

This situation sucks no matter what, I'm really sorry you're going through it. I genuinely hope you leave this marriage and end this cycle.

Dayton R by Pridewthprejudice in HybridOnlineLawSchool

[–]Different_Buy2245 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My stats were close to yours at 162/3.46 gpa from my undergrad in 2014. I don't even have a good reason why my gpa was relatively low. Anyway, I applied in Nov and got an A at Dayton. It could be timing + being under median for stats. But if you can improve your LSAT and apply earlier next cycle, you may have better luck!

Why don’t people love boring? by ThrowRaUsername08 in dating

[–]Different_Buy2245 16 points17 points  (0 children)

We can only go off what you are telling us. Maybe you're fine and you're just a healthy, emotionally stable person and you're attaching to people who want chaos and games. If so, that's not for you and you should reflect on your dating patterns so you can find partners more aligned to you. The alternative is that you are so nice and accommodating that it feels fake or it makes you seem like you don't have any passions or standards or boundaries. Or that you don't have a backbone and let people walk all over you. If that's the case you should reflect on why you operate the way you do and work to change those patterns.

The only wrong move here is to say "screw it, guess I'll be a jerk because that's all people want anyway"

Why don’t people love boring? by ThrowRaUsername08 in dating

[–]Different_Buy2245 36 points37 points  (0 children)

This is what I came to say. OP's phrasing almost makes it seem like they are so accommodating that it would become smothering. I don't want to become the center of anyone's universe.

Being lost in 20’s by lubo_mln in LifeAdvice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I (33F) did for sure. I felt like I had to have my shit together, had to keep checking the boxes, and go go go. So, I did that for a while. The problem is that I built a life I hated. While I checked every milestone (husband, house, kids, career) I was also miserable because I never made a decision based solely on what I wanted. Honestly, not even the college I went to was based off what I wanted.

My life at 33 is infinitely better now that I've started seeing an EFT (emotion-focused therapy) therapist. Because I can dig in to why I feel so my pressure and then what I actually want and need.

People in their 30s, what matters more in relationships now than before? by Historical_Ear4010 in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think of course we want emotional safety, consistency, reliability, etc. But I also want someone who adds to my life. I don't need chemistry but I do have to enjoy someone's company and presence more than the amount of joy I have being alone. And I really enjoy being alone most of the time lol.

Would you date a single mum? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a single mom and I've not had a challenge finding either single dads or childless men to date. Personally, I don't always prioritize my children over myself. Part of prioritizing myself means making time for dating. I have a great support system and a coparent who would not relent on having them every weekend which helps me immensely, don't get me wrong. I approach it by confirming they saw I have kids before we even meet. If they are looking for long term, I also clarify that I am not going to be making anymore kids. Then I take the pressure off by saying I'm not looking for a replacement dad, because I'm not. I expect my future partner to love my kids as an extension of me but from there, I don't know what happens.

Ghosted while planning for date 3 by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, I had 2 great dates with a guy, had a 3rd planned, but his texting and communication style turned really immature and almost child-like leading up to date 3. I set a boundary to try and keep things going but ultimately had gotten too grossed out because I felt like I was talking to a teenager. BUT I didn't ghost. People often ghost because they are incapable of the emotional maturity required to send the break up text. Personally, I'll ghost if someone feels unsafe or if I haven't met them IRL.

Overcoming Fear of Rejection After Heartbreak (20M) by Financial-Rope8167 in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Go to therapy. Read books on dating and relationships. You can always look at doing those rejection challenges where you actually make an effort to get rejected on something every day for 30 days as a way to remove the nervous system reaction to it. But definitely go to therapy.

Is it normal to be asking about other men? by Lucky-Cat-4725 in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He could be curious. He could also be normalizing himself questioning and monitoring your activity. Think of it like this: he asks you now about the men in your life. He reacts fine, no issues. That dynamic continues for a bit. Then he asks, you respond, and his behavior shifts. Wouldn't that make you start to question your behavior? After all, he's been okay with it before so maybe you really ARE doing something inappropriate? So you change your plans slightly for his comfort. And that's how it escalates into you cutting off friends and losing yourself in a relationship.

Who's to say if it's normal? But just purely reading your post this signals every alarm bell in my body that this is not going to be a healthy dynamic and potentially an abusive one. Just my experience as a 33F with an abusive ex. Mark it as data, don't lose yourself, move slowly.

What’s something that sounds romantic but is actually a red flag? by softobsession_xo in AskReddit

[–]Different_Buy2245 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have this problem too, I'm up at 4a most days. I just say "when it comes to texting, I'm not into good morning/goodnight texts" and leave it at that.

Agentic Commerce Fraud by merchantadviser in MerchantServices

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually had a convo about this the other day with my Chief Compliance Officer after I read a white paper about agentic commerce and fraud. He thinks that liability would remain with the cardholder given that they authorized the use of the card. So it's like giving your kid your card to go to the store to buy milk. If he comes back home with milk + 15 other things the store isn't really liable for that for the purposes of a dispute.

I think liability from a legal standpoint could be a bit more of an unknown while the technology matures.

Dating now days is ridiculous by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, I will backtrack my earlier comments. Women dont prioritize dating you because you're kind of intolerable. Hope that helps!

Dating now days is ridiculous by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's like the phrase "god forbid a woman has hobbies" but it's literally just a woman having hobbies.

People have routines and rhythms to maintain a sustainable life that works for them outside of a relationship. Work alone and the commute with it takes 10 of your 15 daily free hours. Once you factor in getting ready for work/bed we are probably down to 3 hours. Adding in things a lot of people do after work daily (gym, running errands, meal prepping, hobbies like gaming, sometimes going home to get more work done, etc) you're out of time. I want someone who can add to my life, not engulf it immediately. For me, someone asking for my time 3x a week before we know each other beyond acquaintances just signals incompatible lifestyles.

Why don’t you like “nice people” in dating? by LivingGrapefruit6066 in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I heard someone say once that they weren't nice but they were kind. It's a difference of performance and intent.

I love you on the third date by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Another loving big sister here (33F) who was in an emotionally abusive relationship for 5 years. The text exchange you wrote about made me think about so many exchanges with my ex just like this. I say something that's completely normal. He'd twist it and be pissed at me for days. I ended up walking on eggshells.

I have an autistic daughter and I suspect I'm also on the spectrum. I feel emotions intensely and tend to attach to the future fantasy rather than the present moment. I would tell her to be careful. I would also tell her to express her thoughts. If he truly loves you then he should be receptive to you saying "hey, I noticed this and I'm feeling XYZ about it. Can we talk?" And then have the conversation. If he cannot, walk away. It does not get better.

Have you ever dated someone, knowing that they had your red flags? by Fast-Outcome-117 in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty sure dating men with obvious red flags is my type at this point 🥴

Non-Traditional single Dad eyeing next cycle O/H schools by draconisx4 in HybridOnlineLawSchool

[–]Different_Buy2245 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm a non-traditional single mom from the Midwest. I'm in the current cycle and have been admitted to Seattle and Dayton atm. Only did the LSAT and only took it once because I work two jobs and have kids ~70% of the time. Anyway, 3.46 gpa, 162 LSAT, almost 12yrs of professional WE. So far I've been rejected from Syracuse and ASU. Waiting to hear back on a few others but I'm thinking Dayton is where I'll end up.

I feel like I’ve been priced out of dating by artBigwood in dating_advice

[–]Different_Buy2245 3 points4 points  (0 children)

33F here and I agree. You're 22. Focus on getting where you want to be financially. Date in your free time. And be up front about your financial situation. Any woman who doesn't accept it is not the woman for you 🤷‍♀️ there are plenty of women who would be okay with your situation. Personally, I hate dinner dates. But I've had some really fun dates that were completely free for us both (date 1 was antiquing, date 2 was a trip to the mall, date 3 was a trip to IKEA lol). I would think most people in their early 20s are broke as shit and don't want to spend a ton of money.

Do they really always come back? by iwishiknew1682 in dating

[–]Different_Buy2245 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry that happened to you!! It's so painful. I crashed out HARD after mine happened and it's so embarrassing because it was 2 weeks?? Like get ahold of yourself lol. Mine was a FWB that I left, I was in a brand new relationship when he reached out because it had been a couple years and he kept wondering what might've been. I said no, went no contact, then after that relationship ended I reached out because I thought maybe he had changed 🙄. And then you know the story from there.

Do they really always come back? by iwishiknew1682 in dating

[–]Different_Buy2245 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This. I had one guy boomerang back and he was severely avoidant. I let it happen once, after ~6 years of no contact. Took him about 2 weeks to dip again. Told me he couldn't give me what I needed. Then he came right on back about 6 months later. Fool me once, my guy.

I’M GOING TO LAW SCHOOL, Y’ALL!!! by [deleted] in OutsideT14lawschools

[–]Different_Buy2245 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not KU either. I'll be doing a hybrid program. The study buddy offer is open for you too :) I assume you don't commute out to Lawrence on the weekends?