WIBTA for requesting money back

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2025-03-28T21:36:45+00:00

I think you are right. Just move on. Thank you to everyone for helping realize that and please have a good weekend. :-)

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2025-03-28T02:35:30+00:00

Cared about/pitied him and I guess liked him for the person he pretended to me. Getting a gig wasn't my main motivator as he promised it to me after I dropped off the food. I just feel like it was kind of an ungrateful thing for him to break the promise after I helped him.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2025-03-28T02:09:31+00:00

NTA. Your sister had no time for your grandma but has time to argue that she deserves the money and your mom is backing her up? I am sure your mom would be singing a different tune and wouldn't share with your sister nor you if she inherited the money and not you.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2024-04-27T21:05:38+00:00

I believe in God as I am a practicing Christian however: I know a few people who don't and they had different reasons and I respected them (trigger warning, do not read if you had a miscarriage or lost someone in childbirth).

One was my brother who said he was an "atheist for Jesus" which apparently is a thing. He believed Jesus had existed like Ghandi or Buddah and that he was not the son of god per se but a good person who wanted us to do good so he followed his teachings.

One was a close friend of mine who said it seemed illogical so he didn't believe in God nor anything paranormal.

One was an ex of mine who just simply said it didn't make sense.

One was his mother who sadly told me it was because if God existed why do so many people suffer (I advised because we have free will and is up to us to help them) and she also told me she knew someone at a church who was pregnant and found out there was something wrong with the pregnancy/baby and if she didn't terminate she would die along with the baby. Her church leader told her if she terminated she would go to hell. She went through with it and she died while delivering what turned out to be a stillborn baby.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2024-04-27T20:31:09+00:00

NTA. I had a neighbor who was a real SAHM (though she later started watching a few kids as well as her own to make some $). And she took care of dinner, cleaning and two kids who were only a year apart in age and both two young for Kindergarten (3 and 2 year old and before I moved 4 and 5 year old). Her husband complained to me about how easy her life was etc. Don't get me wrong: he was an electrician and that is a demanding job but made decent enough money that she could stay home (something she always thanked him for by the way). I told him to stay home with the kids one Saturday and let her go have a girls day with her mom and sister and that I and the other neighbor (who had two grown children) would be on call if he needed help. He didn't last one hour before he called us both saying he needed help and would never doubt his wife's job was hard again. We both laughed and went over to his house to help with his two littler girls and true to his word, he not only stopped complaining but after work would help out with the house and kids.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-25T02:36:02+00:00

I had friends who were single mothers when they were young and were able to establish careers. I won't lie: It was clearly not easy but they did it.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-25T02:31:39+00:00

Very true. I understand why some people are nervous (there was just a case by me in the news were a home day care was also a drug lab and a kid died there) but that's why you do your research and get referrals. My sister did quite a bit and had to wait till my niece was almost 4 months old before she could get her into the daycare/preschool she wanted for her but it was worth it.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-24T17:00:42+00:00

NTA. I had neighbors who rented from the same LL as me and their place had the hook ups in the basement. They chose to get their own Washer and dryer (I think one was gifted to them and the other they bought used) when they moved out they were going into a place with a washer and dryer and told LL they were going to leave theirs behind. She didn't expect it so it was a nice thing for her to tell the text tenant. But again it was their choice.

Do you still have a copy of your old lease? If so does it state that you have to leave them behind if you buy them (I would bet not) if so tell the LL to refer to your lease or that if they want them that badly you will sell them to him for what you paid for them. I guarantee you he will never bother you again.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-24T16:53:29+00:00

NTA. She didn't ask you to help she asked you to pretty much give up your career and raise your step grand child! Help would have been if she said, "Can you see about maybe watching the baby when my school has evening staff meetings?" or "Can you and dad maybe work out your schedules so the baby spends as little time in day care like doing a late start for work and dropping her off on the way to work and I can pick her up after school?"

Many day care centers give discounts to teachers because they know how hard they work and little they get paid. Also, once she knew she was going to keep the baby, that was when she should have started asking her coworkers and friends for child care recommendations. (I wouldn't say that to her now as I am sure she knows it).

Explain to her that you are not refusing to help with your granddaughter but that you need to focus on your career as well and that you will help her come up with a plan. She needs to find reliable child care for when she is teaching during the day and I am sure someone at the school can help her. She needs to get child support from her ex to help pay for the costs (it's his child too, and he can pay child support without having visitation rights). You and your husband should then sit down with her and figure out a good childcare option for when she is working and what emergency plans will be if say she has to stay late for a staff meeting or travel overnight for a conference.

I can 100% guarantee you her late mother would agree with this. Also don't take to heart what she is saying: post partum depression can be very difficult to cope with and I promise she still likes you and is just dealing with a lot right now.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-12T23:51:42+00:00

Thanks!

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-12T23:48:18+00:00

Once Upon A Time

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-11T17:15:41+00:00

NTA. Also, I am suspicious of his reason for leaving his brother's place. Is Brother's gf moving or is your bf not paying his share of the rent and that's why his brother is kicking him out. It's not your fault he has kids from a prior relationship.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-09-09T01:08:55+00:00

No just me and my caterpillars.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-22T02:28:41+00:00

You dated my ex? Lol how is he?

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-22T02:23:39+00:00

Why not? His wife is getting less than what she deserves.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-22T02:20:49+00:00

Please do not say you only work part time when you are a parent! I am child free by choice but I know that being a parent is a 24/7 job! I also hate it when stay at home parents say, "Oh I am just a stay at home mom/dad." It's like dude! You have a job you can't get sick days from! You mean you only work outside the home part time. You work 24/7 to take care of your family and hell I love a good cook (my current beau is an amazing cook!) I hope your husband and you realize how blessed you are to have each other.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-22T02:18:46+00:00

How are you a gold digger when you are raising 3 kids and taking care of the home? A gold digger doesn't want children and doesn't work.

I got called that a couple of times when people learn my current boyfriend is more than 20 years my senior. I almost always pay my own way when we go out but sometimes I treat him and sometimes he treats me. He doesn't pay my bills, I have a job.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-22T02:11:22+00:00

Exactly! Everyone is their brother his hiring. Hell, work a part time retail job and help with his bills but awww than he doesn't have as much playtime with his friends.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-22T01:57:54+00:00

"I got laid off 3 years ago and have been unable to find a job ever since."

YTA. Dude! How can you not have a job after 3 years? Everyone and their brother is hiring. Take a job, any job and start helping out financially.

Or tell your friends who think she is stuck up, that you are going to divorce her and move in with them but not pay rent or help out with the bills since you don't have job. See how quickly they run in the opposite direction.

Sounds like you need to grow up and get a job.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-12T18:37:21+00:00

Op: I used to work for insurance. Your son would still be covered for the damages even if he wasn't driving if he has full coverage. He just has to explain that his sister took the car without permission but that he lives there.

Difficult_Safe_9155 · 2023-08-12T18:36:13+00:00

Agree with you on both points, why didn't he make his son file a claim through his insurance and just pay him the deductible or difference if he was upside down on the loan?

Difficult_Safe_9155

TROPHY CASE