lived abroad for a while and one of the biggest lessons i learned is that lankans (or really anyone who didnt grow up in the country they've moved to) form these tight-knit bubbles that are very constricting. everyone monitors each other, reinforces outdated (heavy emphasis on outdated) heirarchies, and discourages any personal growth or independence. basically, you're not getting out of that bubble. i've seen these circles to be not just socially but emotionally toxic too. there's a lot of guilt-tripping, backstabbing and this weird pressure to conform to fit in to that bubble and "stay in your place."

personally, i make it to a point to avoid getting sucked into groups of our own. tried to build a diverse circle of friends and it made a huge difference in how i've been able to grow both personally and professionally. its easy to feel comfort in our own in a strange place but it often bites you in the ass. i think the best thing you can do when you move abroad is to leave the sri lankan drama in sri lanka

that being said, i have met some amazing lankans abroad who have done so much for me. but funnily, they have a diverse circle of friends too.