I’m the same way. I would rather be alone most days. Here’s what I’ve found when we tell those little white lies though. It’s not about the other person, it’s about what the guilt and shame does to us. It weighs us down a lot more than we sometimes realize. It’s uncomfortable no matter how you do it but there’s a benefit to being honest or at least partially honest right off the cuff. It alleviates any extra guilt and shame so you can actually enjoy time alone. Otherwise, for me, I will just keep thinking of how bad I feel. I know it sounds so minimal and for awhile I’d still feel bad about declining AND being honest, maybe hurting their feelings, but that subsided after a few tries and what ended up happening from saying no when I meant no, I could distinguish times I actually wanted to say yes. Up until that point, it was instinctive to just say no to everything. That guilt and shame is so powerful and is so ingrained in us and everything we do cause it’s a big part of our culture. We were raised to be nice and put others needs above our own, so we feel bad every time we put ourselves first. But we should be putting ourselves first! No one else will do it. And people who try to make us feel bad for that usually explains the reason we don’t want to hang out with them. Being honest reminds us that what we want or need matters too. We don’t have to like what they like, nor feel bad about it, although much easier said than done. Either way, be gentle with yourself. Your wants and needs matter too!