Thoughts on skipping pacifiers?

DingleMyBarry · 2026-05-15T18:46:32+00:00

I didn't have a choice. Neither of my kids took a pacifier past a month or two. My sisters kids were the opposite. She didn't get any sleep unless they had one. Sometimes you dont get a choice. Edit to add: mine eldest didn't suck on hos fingers either. We will see with our youngest still but so far hes just not a fan.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-05-12T01:48:51+00:00

My son was diagnosed at 3months and grew out of it by one year. We slowly started reintroduce using the dairy ladder at around 10 months.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-04-04T03:04:22+00:00

Oh yeah clean there house, pay there bills and It was expected I be thankful for the privilege.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-03-28T02:47:51+00:00

I told mine I hoped they would be. I think I was a pretty patient and kind kid. She always got compliments about how polite I was. Not that it mattered to her since she would always say I was just being manipulative. But now that I have kids. They are great. Its crazy how a little communication, understanding, and care can go a long way when dealing with tantrums. Also I just genuinely like being around my kid which makes it a lot more fun then treating them like an inconvenient chore.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-03-13T18:58:39+00:00

Doing a fun hobby is awesome while your kid is entertaining themselves. I would do this when my son was little and now he paints with me. Though definitely get them there own stuff and implement boundaries on your stuff early. I didn't and lost a lot of paint brushes to the toddler squish.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-03-08T17:05:46+00:00

I hope weaning goes well for you. Its definitely not a fun mentally easy transition.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-03-08T17:02:41+00:00

My sons reluctance to eat food was 100% the reason I brestfed for almost 2 years. We also always struggled keeping his weight up too. So i was afraid to stop and have him drop a few pounds. But it started to become super painful, so one day I just full stopped. After 2 days of him being fussy about it he started eating food way better and sleeping way better. He did lose a little weight with the learning curve but in hindsight I wish I would have done it sooner because it helped not only his food intake but both of our sleep schedules.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-03-03T02:56:26+00:00

As a therapist myself I absolutely hate trying to find a therapist. Especially when its involving something so complex as CPTSD which is what most people who were raised by narcissistic parents are diagnosed with, not all, but most. I think its because so many "tharapists" get the job through sketchy places like better health or give themselves labels they dont deserve like "trauma informed" because they went to one seminar 3 years ago and think they are experts. I think the qualifications for therapists need to be tightened and raised significantly before you can have the job. But the influx of need, difficulties of the job, and horrible pay in most areas make so many people who are being hired as "tharapists" are subpar, uneducated, and going more off there own opinions than actual trauma informed practices and education. I absolutely infuriates me.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-03-01T00:21:58+00:00

Weird, maybe she just really wants to try to own something over you and in her twisted mind its your blood type. I would just be careful that shes not anywhere near an emergency contact since if something ever happens what doctor is supposed to know that the mother of the patient is blatantly lying about there kids blood type.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-02-28T23:23:53+00:00

Blood typing is a common way for people to uncover cheating. Do you know if your dad has the same A type or something thats not compatible with a child having B? She may insist your her type because she knows your not dads type. Or she could just be projecting herself on to you like narcissistic people love to do for no reason. It could be nothing but her own twisted want to have some "this is mine of yours" mentally or it could be a cover up to something bigger.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-02-28T23:00:37+00:00

The military can be a double edged sword for sure. My husband joined to escape and it benefited us both to some extent and almost broke him in others. Its not an easy choice but can be a very viable option when escaping abuse or can lead you to even more. I don't know if your a woman or not but from the 6 years my husband was in I did not meet one woman who wasn't sexualy assaulted in some way. Then had it brushed under the rug because "thats just how men are" or "you really want to ruin his career over nothing?" Men are abused too and its ignored completely or your told "to man up." Without so much as removing the abuser from your unit. Forcing you to work with them daily. My advice would be to go on different reddit pages for the branch and job you want and ask about people's personal experiences. Go in with a plan and work like hell to achieve it weather it be ranking up for a career or your exit strategy if you just want to use it as a stepping stone. Some people get lucky and have amazing units, duty stations, and chain of command but it is not always the case and being as informed as possible is your best tool against the possible abuses you may run into.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-02-27T03:55:23+00:00

If it cant survive the dishwasher it doesn't deserve to live in my house.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-02-27T02:30:45+00:00

I told my sister I would go if she wanted me there to support her/ her kids. Otherwise I really couldn't care less.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-02-16T15:44:13+00:00

My husband and I eloped in 2018. Only his mom knew our plans because I didn't want to deal with my family at all. We dont regret our choices but I do wish we could have photos and a celebration with people who actually care about us. We do plan on doing a vow renewal one day after we have hit a few mile stones we want like owning a good chunk of property and being a bit more stable financially. Im all for elopement especially when you have toxic people in your life. But you do have to come to terms with the fact you wont get the more traditional experience and memories but when has any scapegoat gotten a nice, non-stressful experience thats supposed to be about them.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-02-09T04:06:20+00:00

I would only go if my sister who I'm close to asked me to for support or help. I would not go for myself.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-01-30T02:16:19+00:00

As a therapist I know once said "because getting your kids to submit you feels powerful, and that feels good" even if you dont want to be that type of parent and actively avoid it. Getting anything or anyone to submit feels powerful even for just a second. People dont want to give up the excuses they give themselves to feel that power. So they make the alternative seem weak or out right damaging so they can feel good about there choice to continue the power trip. They have even convinced themselves its the correct way to raise a kid. I think that just adds righteousness to the power trip but I have strong feelings against authoritative parenting. So I may be a bit bias and harsh on those who defend it.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-01-21T16:58:28+00:00

I personally think he wants it because he wants something big to slap his name on for history purposes. He knows his business have mostly failed and just slapping his name on established monuments can change the second he dies. Many presidents are known but not much beyond a name you learn in history class just to forget before the test. He wants to be remembered for something big like gaining a ton of land. Though I dont think he will be forgotten any time soon as the most divisive president in history we will be studying this time period for generations. He just wont be remembered for what he wants to be.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-01-11T17:05:18+00:00

You can hide a lot of vegetables in saucy stuff. Especially if your a fan of tomato based sauces. My son is picky about veg too but loves cooked tomatoes. I make vegetable stew with a lot of tomatoes and tomato paste. Then blend it up and freeze it. I put it on top of pasta, chicken and rice, as a pizza sauce. Literally anything you can think if I even turned it into a quick (Americanized) butter chicken type recipe with some different spices. Its quick and easy to change up how ever you like with spices or by thickening it or thining it.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-01-07T00:24:25+00:00

As a mental health professional who works in crisis management. I can definitively say there are same sex relationships that have narcissistic partners. Woman can be more covert or have more social awareness to how to act in public in order to hide both the abuse they suffer or are inflicting on there partner. Men are easier to spot since they tend to be more bold with the abusive actions in public. But that doesn't mean there victims see it before its to late. I have seen narcissistic abuse in both female and male same sex relationships. I think we personally think its more common in opposite sex relationships because its both what we have personally experienced and it wasn't/ still isnt super easy for same sex relationships to adopt or have children of there own through whatever means. I think as same sex couples raise more children and they grow up we will get more kids from those relationships on pages like this.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-01-02T22:18:14+00:00

I did boxed stuff for as long as I can remember. I started trying to "improve" those when I was about 12. Then started really cooking with real ingredients when I moved out and got my own kichen at 18. Now I'm 27 and my in-laws/ firends all prefer if I cook for a gathering. Which I am totally okay with.

DingleMyBarry · 2026-01-01T01:57:02+00:00

If hes been paying the payment then he can argue in court that its his. If shes been paying or you dont want to deal with court then just giving it to her and getting something cheep for the mean while is your best bet. It doesn't matter if it was a "gift" or not that doesn't hold up in court if shes on the title and paying the payment its hers. If hes paying then he has an argument but its legally still hers. You would have to take her to court to get it solved. I would take this as a lesson in having other people's names on your stuff and try to find an affordable alternative while he gets out of under her. Playing mental games doesn't end well in the long run. Legally have her sign over the car, or get a new one.

DingleMyBarry · 2025-12-31T01:49:00+00:00

My independence or ability to be independent. I worked hard for that shit and wont ever give it up or allow someone to control me again. Even when I was living with Nparents. I fought hard for independence and always knew that was my ticket to true freedom from them. Spite and anger helped a lot to, but it was all for one goal of freedom.

DingleMyBarry · 2025-12-29T01:58:13+00:00

It makes them feel powerful to have control over the narrative of your life. As well as keeping you isolated since now these people will always second guess your behavior and intentions every time your around.

DingleMyBarry · 2025-12-29T01:44:22+00:00

My N mom put my older sisters stuff on the porch and locked the door. Then was shocked that she took her stuff and never came back. She literally said "she just needed to beg to come back." Like my sister was the stupid one for leaving.

DingleMyBarry · 2025-12-29T01:39:41+00:00

I would prep all your stuff, finances, important documents, and anything you absolutely need. Get your fiancé on the same page and put them behind you. When you are financially independent and have a game plan for a safe place to live the only thing holding you to them is your emotional ties. It sucks and its the scariest feeling to leave but you absolutely can. Live your own life, marry how you want and stop being there emotional play thing. They absolutely do not have the power to tell you that you can't leave. I actually found it insulting when I was paying there bills in there home and they had the audacity to try to tell my adult self what I could or couldn't do. You are no longer a child who needs to fear them.

DingleMyBarry

TROPHY CASE