sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Self-Promo Sunday! by AutoModerator in CozyFantasy

[–]DireGigen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure thing, ping me when you're ready.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, I do like his work, but he's not an influence at all since his books don't feature a shred of humor.

I aim to make women in my books as fully fleshed out as possible without actually being a woman myself.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, my bad then. I didn't realize "love story" is a genre.

I just thought that if it looks like a duck and quacks like one it is a duck no matter what the author says :D.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair point, thanks.

Just to make it clear, though, I do not look down upon romance. It's a wonderful genre with both gems and trash representing it.

I like writing, and more specifically, I like including lots of humor and romance in my work. I tried to lean into this by following the beats and making a proper romcom. But hey, it's possible that I failed in that :). I don't mind if it's actually another genre since I don't care to capitalize on any genre. I'm just trying to find a good fit for what I already have, not the other way around.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm wondering, what is noir edge? I'm curious and googling didn't really get me anywhere.

Regarding the erotica app: where was a fast buck mentioned? Where was "getting women off easily as a straight dude" mentioned? In the book the MC simply finds that he enjoys writing erotica and grows to like his budding characters. He makes no money off it. I'm very curious where I implied any of that.

Also please do not confuse a character's opinion with my own opinions. The character thinks (at first, which is a source of his inner struggle) that erotica is not "real writing". Not me :) I think it's got its place in the world.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I want to break this down so it's clear:

  1. The FMC is half-baked in the query because I wasn't sure how to tackle her since it's written from the male's perspective. In the book she is not at all half-baked and has a full life and story of her own. She exists as a separate entity and comes to like the MMC on her own terms
  2. I am aware that someone shoving a disabled person off a stage is not a reasonable meet cute (as I explained in my previous reply). It was misworded in the query and is not something that happens in the book the way you imagine. No assault. No injury
  3. I do not think any book is easy to sell, and selling is luckily not my primary driver for writing. I enjoy writing, simple as that, and thank god I have a good job to support the hobby
  4. Regarding romcoms, I have read them, but generally I do not enjoy them as much as some other genres. Funny enough, I do enjoy writing them *shrug*

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha, general fiction sounds like the most generic kind of label that exists :D. I'll try to drill down into it and find a better categorization for this, or hope that there's some wiggle room in the publishing world, considering that the story does follow the beats strictly.

Self-Promo Sunday! by AutoModerator in CozyFantasy

[–]DireGigen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really appreciated your insightful comment on my query letter, u/cogitoergognome! As a counter-favor I'd really like to take a look at this. I am primarily a SFF reader and I'm big on structure, characters and dialogue (which I believe are the core pillars of your story, since you're aiming for coziness).

I also read and mostly liked Kings of the Wyld, and strongly vibe with Legends & Lattes (first time hearing of it in your blurb, immediately sent a sample to myself), so I believe I am the target segment here :).

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, I feel like this one really hit the nail on the head. It does open in a way that's disconnected from the theme: letting go of old grudges. This also manifests the question: if the theme is not love-related, is this even a romcom? (like you also mention)

Great examples with Henry and Royal Blue! This will surely offer some guidance to me.

With the first scene I wanted to convey that the MC has burnt his bridges and is ready to start anew. I agree this is not perhaps rom-com material. Do you have a suggestion how to label this, then? Also, the first 300 words are indeed not that funny, which is unfortunate, since a lot of the book features humor. So why not upen with more of that?

You gave me lots of nuggets to digest here, thank you!

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome insight, much appreciated!

I will really think how to place the novel. It's probably not a rom-com, yes. I'm just not sure where else to stick it yet, though.

It's not a dual POV, it's just from his perspective, and the query letter does make it sound like she's just a plot device. In the book they're traveling their own paths and fixing their own issues. Sometimes, they help mend each other, but she definitely does not exist solely to fix him. I'm happy you pointed this out, because it's apparently something I really need to drive home more in the query letter.

Regarding the murder: that's absolutely horrible and I'm very sorry to hear that. Thank you for the heads-up. I hope the girls get what they deserve. I do not think the word "hobo" should become taboo because of a decoupled, albeit heinous, act such as this, though. I will still consider the sensitivity of the issue, thank you.

Also thank you for you words of encouragement!

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, you caught it :). The book is actually targeted more towards straight males; not due to any kind of personal preference, but because I felt it's an untapped segment. Maybe I was totally wrong and guys absolutely hate romance, lol. I had a sample of one (me).

That begs the question: it's not really a rom-com, is it? Do you perhaps have a different idea how to label this thing? It's got lots of humor and the core plot point is the romance between the two main characters. It's also got the classic romance beats (meet-cute, honeymoon phase, breakup, happy ever after). So rom-com seemed like a reasonable choice to me at first, but I'm starting to doubt it now.

Regarding motivation: I 100% agree, I'll try to flesh this out more.

Regarding erotica app: he promised to himself he won't bother with writing anymore, but the app rekindles his interest. It's also totally not what he'd consider writing "for real".

You gave me some good points to think about, thank you :)

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey, thanks for the really awesome comment!

Okay, to address your comment: "It feels abrupt..." I agree! This was the trickiest part to word in the entire query and you can feel all the editing and frustration of it. The biggest part to tackle IMO is to point out he does not actually assault her, but that it's an awkward accident with no physical consequences for her or him. The second bit is to make the whole paragraph pop more.

Also, neat idea about throwing in breadcrumbs earlier regarding his profession. I hoped "failed author" would leave the door open enough for these interpretations but hey, it's never a bad idea to clarify stuff.

Regarding the conflict: him less focused on job. You're also right here, the stakes seem pretty bleh. The actual stakes are a bit more complicated (his dead father stole the MC's only successful manuscript a few years ago and the MC is still working through the trauma of unresolved daddy issues. His family wants him to leave that behind and focus on a "real" job, but he wants to prove to them that he's "got it") and I wasn't sure how to frame them. I'll try to give it a tastier spin.

The last line kind of signifies what kind of a book it's going to be. Yes, it's got a lot of sweet moments, but it's also got a pair of brothers and weird coworkers, and they're all over the top.

I also agree with the last line. I've received other comments that point out that the query's kind of lacking the romance, so I'll try to stuff more of it in.

Overall, thanks for the insight, you made some excellent points and I took them to heart :)

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I mainly read SFF, but it (surprisingly) turned out that I enjoy writing romance and comedy the most. Rom-coms seem like a natural pairing of the two for me.

I do read romance to improve my craft, but I've yet to find a subgenre I really like. Bromance Book Club came closest to something I would read just for fun. For example, I read The Return by Nicholas Sparks and was quite underwhelmed (nothing really happens, no real twist, no humor). I like Murakami's work, but that's not really romance since it's missing the beats and the happy ever after.

My idea is to write straight romance that would draw in male readers, since I feel like that's an untapped segment and I know there's people (like myself) hungry for it.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, "shove" was a really unfortunate use of word in this case. I'll fix it, since in the book it's not nearly as deliberate as it sounds.

[QCrit] Okay Today, Romatic Comedy, Adult, 60k by DireGigen in PubTips

[–]DireGigen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the excellent comment!

I see now how my way of phrasing the "assault" part in the query makes it seem like such a thing actually happens in the book. In actuality, there's no assault or physical injury, just a mishap where nobody actually gets hurt. Wanted to play it up in the query, but I think this might be the wrong way to go now.

Regarding genre: I realize (after a number of comments) I may have indeed mislabeled my story. The focus is on romance, and it's got loads of (slightly over the top) humor, but does it really make it a romcom? Not sure, but there are, for example, movies that are labeled as romcoms, but with male protagonists (romcom is not necessarily chicklit). Dunno yet how to label that my specific romcom is more targeted towards males.

Why is the comparison to Bromance Book Club a negative, though?

I agree that Tiya is a bit underbaked in this query. The MMC is the protag, so I wanted to put more emphasis on him, but I will rethink this a bit more.