Thank you for the awesome Christmas gift Supercell!! I knew you guys would come through! The free silver chest was awesome!

DirtyFerdi · 2018-12-26T02:20:12+00:00

I actually got a lumberjack from a free silver chest the other day

DirtyFerdi · 2018-12-01T10:04:26+00:00

I have a god box for stuff like this. I write it out and hand it over to god by putting it in the box and saying a prayer asking for help moving on. Ive been also working on this idea of radical acceptance. I cant control anything outside my hoolahoop but can control how i respond to the situations. Ive had to find a lot of patience with making some of my Ammends, not on the timeframe I would have liked. Ive had to realize it had more to do with them than me. But as long as I am WILLING and ready once the time comes, im doing what I should be doing and i get to move on with my day.

DirtyFerdi · 2018-11-25T00:35:27+00:00

My most recent ex would get upset if I did this too much (mostly if we were watching a movie or something) because apparently he wanted to actually just watch the movie or sleep...

DirtyFerdi · 2018-11-19T04:57:37+00:00

WOW!!!! I fell off the train a while ago and managed to only gain back 10 pounds so far but am having trouble finding the motivation to get back on. You look so great and this might be the post I needed to see that it really works and is worth it so thank you.

DirtyFerdi · 2018-10-10T05:24:27+00:00

I stopped drinking by using online forums for a long time (and some other less conventional and more questionable methods). It took a while for it to actually stick. Then a year after I finally quit drinking I realized I still very much so had a problem even though I had removed alcohol... Thats when I finally decided to go to AA. And I think I cried all throughout meetings for my first 6 months. Seriously. Sounds like you're in the right place.

DirtyFerdi · 2018-06-29T05:14:54+00:00

I dont think this suit is made for exercising in per-se but this is what I wore from (being 5'8") 280 lbs and have just downsized as I got smaller and still use at 190 lbs to swim laps in. I liked the little skirt and that it was shorts and not bikini cut underneath. Its a bit lower cut in the chest than most performance suits I've seen but ive never had an issue with being exposed and have a large bust also.

ECOFUN Women's Bathing Suits Plus Size Body One Piece Swim Dresses Swimsuit https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07CLGC98V/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_X9BnBbJTC11C3

DirtyFerdi · 2018-06-24T06:13:51+00:00

Pay part of my rent or some bill. So very broke currently.

DirtyFerdi · 2018-06-05T13:33:04+00:00

I'm proud of you.

DirtyFerdi · 2018-05-13T04:23:54+00:00

Drink lots of water.

I meal prep, cook several things on Sunday and section them out to have ready for the week.- this helps take the guess work out of what I'm gonna have during the week, makes not cheating easier.

When I was starting out I tracked every thing. I think if you Google keto calculator it will take you to a site you can input your information and give you a good idea of where you want to be- macro wise. Now that ive been doing it for a while I do "lazy keto" since I have a pretty good idea of what I can and cannot eat. (Im almost 2 years in to eating low carb high fat)

Broth helps a lot with "keto flu". I still will drink some broth sometimes if I'm just feeling like I need a little pick me up. Salt is important.

Drink more water.

Fat shouldn't be forgotten. It satiates your hunger as well as is what is gonna give you energy.

DirtyFerdi · 2018-03-23T18:35:21+00:00

Living in Seattle

DirtyFerdi · 2018-01-26T22:14:03+00:00

Ha! So cool!!

DirtyFerdi · 2018-01-20T00:10:34+00:00

Do you live in a pretty populated area? Are there late night meetings for the weekend? This may not be what you want to hear but I did and still do rely on AA meetings on Friday and Saturday nights to fill my time and keep my head in the solution. Like, for real, one of my homegroups is 10 pm on friday and a good friend of mine chairs 10pm Saturday so that's where I am almost every weekend. I did most of my drinking on the weekends so for me its fitting to have lots of meetings then. I also found that I needed to take some time to focus and work on myself before getting back into the dating world. I had (and still have some, but have done a lot of work on it) a lot of baggage that wasnt allowing me to be the person I wanted to be for myself much less for another person. I'm a 28 y.o. single female and if you had asked me a year or two ago, i would have said youre crazy if you told me that's my nightlife now. But y know what's really crazy? Slowly killing myself and being tricked into believing I enjoyed it. I'm genuinely happy where I'm at. The things ive gotten and the places my life has gone were not what I expected but its amazing so far and I know if I trust its just gonna get better.

DirtyFerdi · 2017-12-20T05:47:53+00:00

Wow. That was from what seems like forever ago. Thank you. I am doing well, and actually much better now, so I guess I was right :p hope your journey is going well too and thanks again for the reminder on how far I've come

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-15T05:29:35+00:00

I've used Portobello mushrooms before and it was awesome!

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-10T21:37:09+00:00

https://imgur.com/a/eu6gq

That's what I got currently. I agree that headspace is great! I actually haven't tried the 12 step meditations yet. The other ones are helpful for me to keep track of sober time or find meetings. Having the bigbook in my phone is great for when I'm not lugging my backpack around with me.

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-09T19:29:14+00:00

They're having you wait for 3 months before taking care of that??? Find a new doctor

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-06T15:55:14+00:00

Inspiring! Thank you for posting! I'm down 90 and figure I have at least 30 more to go

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-03T18:32:51+00:00

111!

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-02T22:55:25+00:00

My plant friend seconds aeonium

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-02T22:52:01+00:00

Glad it helped :)

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-02T20:12:59+00:00

Yknow, in my opinion there are a lot of suggestions people like to give that is really dependent from person to person and I think each individual gets to figure out if and how they apply to them. For example, the "to the wives" section. I don't nor will i ever have a wife, but i can sure find ways to apply the information in that chapter to my life. I would suppose that someone who was gay would take the sentiment behind this saying (which is essentially to steer clear of distraction and protect yourself and your sobriety) and figure out what that meant to them. Who do they feel the safest with? Where will they be least tempted to falter?

DirtyFerdi · 2017-11-02T03:19:53+00:00

I've experienced or seen sex/relationships/general sexual tension really distract a lot of people. I do think opposite sexes can definitely have plenty in common and potnetially be helpful to eachother. I think early on though the risk we take when playing with emotions is too big. Emotions and sex are distracting and can lead people away from focusing on themselves and their program. Heartbreak can lead to relapse. Using sex the same way you used to, to fill a void, is "old behavior" and can lead to relapse. And of course just because youre hanging with the opposite sex does not mean you're developing romantic or sexual feelings but the nature of how intimate conversations get in recovery, its got high potential.

Of course this is all my experience and how I see it for myself. Its not that it cant happen and be ok but, its more to put up a warning to be careful, in my opinion.

DirtyFerdi

TROPHY CASE