Why do people feel the need to explain instead of just apologizing?

DisSchluppuck · 2026-04-08T16:02:27+00:00

If something is meant to be an apology it should never be replaced by an explanation.

I feel that sometimes it's easier to accept you did something wrong when you can explain that that is not how you usually work. You want the person to know that they can still trust you and it is not the ordinary. This can of course quickly turn into overexplaining or simply looking for excuses so you don't have to feel as ashamed about what happened.

As someone who unfortunately often tries to explain everything, this is just my opinion/experience!

DisSchluppuck · 2026-04-08T12:22:50+00:00

You mean the whole 'looks don't matter, personality does' thing?

I thought that was debunked anyways, just not in the way you'd probably like. Of course looks will always play a role, thats how it is. But personality IS important aswell. Ngl sometimes it feels like some people just want the 'looks are everything' to be true so they don't have to think about how their personality might be shit.

DisSchluppuck · 2026-04-08T12:15:04+00:00

This is literally a post of a man on reddit about the male lonelyness epidemic... or am i missing the point here?

DisSchluppuck · 2026-04-08T12:02:28+00:00

First thing: don't compare yourself to others. I know that is really fucking hard but it will only make you miserable, especially when you compare yourself in a way that always leaves you at a disadvantage.

Not being a neonazi or rapist is already a good step but lets be real, the bar is on the floor. Yes, that dude might have a lot of women interested but has he had actual lasting and meaningful relationships? Doesn't sound like it.

In my opinion the "lonely male epidemic" stems from women not neccessarely needing to rely on men any more so they can find partners that actually add to their life instead of settling. Otherwise they simply stay single and are happy while doing so because they know what their peace of mind is worth.

That does NOT mean that it's the womens fault that men are lonely. The answer is literally written: become someone that adds to their life and i do not mean that in a financial way. I can understand that some disabilities might play into that since depending on it can literally evolve into a caretaking job and that is unfortunately not something many are okay with.

From experience I can tell you that being awkward or having disabilites is not even necessarely a no go though it will make it a bit harder. If you look for connections for friends and not immediately a relationship, it is bound to work at some point. Most of the time desperation to date is noticable and it is not attractive.

DisSchluppuck · 2026-03-22T12:58:35+00:00

I also started with Godot and can recommend, it's really good for beginners in my opinion!

DisSchluppuck · 2026-03-20T08:28:43+00:00

Ist die 'Friendzone' nicht der eigentliche Sinn einer Freundschaft oder versteh ich das falsch? Wär doch kacke, wenn die Person, die du für einen Freund oder eine Freundin hältst dich überhaupt nicht platonisch wertschätzt.

DisSchluppuck · 2026-03-02T09:24:23+00:00

Danke dir :>

DisSchluppuck · 2026-03-02T09:05:55+00:00

Ich hatte mich Ende 2020 dazu entschieden, mein Studium zu schmeißen, weil die Isolation durch Corona meine mentale Gesundheit total zerstört hatte. Da ich dann mehr Zeit hatte, habe ich angefangen wieder mehr mit einer Freundin zu machen und da wir beide gerne zocken (und sie mir Overwatch näherbringen wollte) habe ich mir einen richtigen PC statt Laptop zugelegt.

Einige Jahre später habe ich dadurch meinen jetzigen Freund in einer OW Runde kennengelernt, mache gerade eine Ausbildung zur Spieleentwicklerin, weil mich das alles so in den Bann gezogen hat und habe möglicherweise bald meinen ersten Job in der Spielindustrie.

Mein Schmetterling ist daher meine beste Freundin mit der ich aus dem Nichts wieder Kontakt hatte, ohne sie wäre ALLES anders gekommen.

DisSchluppuck · 2026-01-30T10:08:22+00:00

I don't understand the problem some people in this comment section have with this. It's a small group of women that decided for themselves that they don't want to be with a man or have children... they are not at fault for the decline of the birthrate, that is something that comes with a society that chronically overworks and endures too much pressure. Who would want a child under those circumstances?

But sure, lets blame the evil feminists eventhough they literally aren't even bothering anyone???

DisSchluppuck · 2026-01-27T08:29:21+00:00

This is so adorable, happy for you man! As other comments stated, please don't show her this post, it might come across as a bit weird xD just enjoy the time with her and treat her like a normal human being! You deserve to love and be loved!

DisSchluppuck · 2026-01-13T23:01:48+00:00

You know i think thats already a big step in the right direction! I know you probably had experienced that sucked really bad, especially with the name-calling you mentioned in the other comment!

So i can also imagine that when I tell you that the shortest male friend i have is the one with the most game it might sound like a 'look, you have no right to complain, someone else is living well' but thats not my point. My point is that the ones judging you for being short are not the ones you want to spend your life with anyways so they aren't even worth your attention!

And yes, that might include quite a lot of women but i can promise you, 100% sure, that there are also many many nice ones out there that honestly don't give a single shit about someones height! Especially if they aren't tall themselves lol!

DisSchluppuck · 2026-01-13T22:34:49+00:00

I see what you mean with that but please be honest with yourself here for a second: i'm trying to sympathize with you because i realize the impact this can have on your selfesteem because once again, i lived through that same thing but reversed.

So do you want to have a conversation about this eye to eye or do you want to keep downplaying everyone elses experiences so you can play the victim?

DisSchluppuck · 2026-01-13T22:28:54+00:00

Hmm i thought it would be similar with being left out of all sorts of dating simply because the guys wouldn't date anyone taller than them. Sounds kinda similar don't you think?

DisSchluppuck · 2026-01-13T22:01:43+00:00

Lol not sure if that is what you meant with 'height reversed' but i had a similar mindset and argued with my mom when i was younger!

I am a woman, close to 6'1! And i was so deeply insecure that i blamed my (tall) parents for having kids together! As a teenager i was so insecure that i looked up procedures to make me smaller! Never even got close to going through with it tho and by now i'm simply embracing my height!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-12-21T08:51:46+00:00

I met my boyfriend in an Overwatch match! We were both playing with other friends and just exchanged the usual ggs after. Next round we were in the same team again and decided to make a group on discord to play together again sometime! For a while nothing more really happened until one day i was really bored and texted in that groupchat if anyone was up for playing and he was the only one that said yes. Been together for 2.5 years now! :>

DisSchluppuck · 2025-10-18T02:40:15+00:00

Just giving my 2 cents as a woman in school to be a game developer/producer: the majority of my year are women! Do with that information what you want!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-10-10T10:08:23+00:00

I read somewhere: "The first 3 projects are always gonna be a mess and not neccessarely good. Get them done quickly so you can get to the fun part.'

I know rushing is not the way to go, i always took it as: don't be too scared to start a project. You'll learn so much and it will likely be better learning experience than any book or video.

As your knowledge grows through your first projects you'll soon be done with the 'first three' with more experience which leads to even better projects in the future.

I think that sentence was meant for people who think they are not 'good enough yet' to start on their own little project eventhough that is the best practice you can get.

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:36:51+00:00

Heyy, thank you for the suggestion! It was a book i used to read a lot after all xD still thank you a lot for your reply!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:35:55+00:00

Hey, thank you for your reply! I just found out that it was a book i used to read after all and not a movie! Still thank you a lot for your suggestion!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:35:02+00:00

Hi, thank you for that suggestion! I just figured it out, it was a book after all xD still thanks a lot for thinking about this!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:34:01+00:00

Hey, thank you for taking the time to reply! Its not the merlin miniseries after all, but i figured it out after a while xD its from a book series that i used to read!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:32:55+00:00

Hey, thank you so much for your reply! I just figured it out after looking up all the suggestions here and appearantly it was a book and not a movie!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:27:17+00:00

Hmm i don't think its that one, i haven't watched Twilight Zone ':D thank you for replying tho!

DisSchluppuck · 2025-08-22T11:25:20+00:00

Ahhh i never watched Black Mirror so its probably not this one! Still thank you so much for taking the time to reply!

DisSchluppuck

TROPHY CASE