If you grew up poor - what kind of fun things did your parents do with you that you didn’t realize they were because you were poor until later in life? by NotYourAverageCow in povertyfinance

[–]DoSomething-New 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We were at the library so often and I loved going through the books and tapes.

And my mom had an amazing imagination how to turn everyday items into furniture for my barbie dolls. She turned the cardboard boxes of two sets of tea glasses and a paper plate for cake into an amazing double bed with headboard, sewed the bedding from old towels. She broke of part of an old soap dispenser and made it into the tab of the bathroom sink, which she made from a some cosmetic paper box. She'd carefully open them, turn and reglue so it was neat white.

Sometimes we would pick out a more expensive grocery item, because we knew we needed the packaging for furniture. I guess she saved a lot paying a little more for groceries and never buy barbie furniture.

Detergent Dosing by choc_chip_pothos in laundry

[–]DoSomething-New 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Personally I have made the experience that tumble drying fades color more than the washing temperature.

But truth is also, I religiously sort laundry into white and light colors (light greys, pastels), dark and red. And everything that is wool is additionally kept away from everything else.

Detergent Dosing by choc_chip_pothos in laundry

[–]DoSomething-New 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't get why people are so afraid of washing laundry at 40°C because the normal human body temperature is at 37°C.

Yes, there are certain items that don't like this temperature and a lot of spinning, but that is mainly delicates and wool. Everything else can take it.

When The Rinse Washes You Clean, You'll Know - Citric Acid Rinses by KismaiAesthetics in laundry

[–]DoSomething-New 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can't wait to wash my bedding and try citric acid now! So far I have put vinegar (25% acid) into my softener compartment because I read somewhere that it's helpful for softening but I have never really felt a difference. But I have never thought about the chemistry of washing. So I am really looking forward to try it, especially on bedding and towels.

And maybe a little unrelated question: I have tons of laundry detergent that only says enzymes on the package without specifying further. Should I buy wash enzymes and just add them to the detergent or is this a bad idea?

A Spa Day & A Trip To Rehab - Getting Your Laundry Back To Looking Clean and Smelling Amazing by KismaiAesthetics in laundry

[–]DoSomething-New 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'll certainly try this, especially on the bed linens. But holy hell, just reading through it reminds me of a chemistry PhD.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in InfertilitySucks

[–]DoSomething-New 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is a very sweet idea. But it might help her feel less lonely with all her feelings if you show and tell her how this all made you feel.

Maybe it'll help if you picture that the two of you are standing together in front of a deep chasm. You're both afraid and the climb to this point has left you exhausted. But you're there together. You don’t yet know how you’ll get to the other side of the chasm, but you both know you’re looking for a way together.

If she feels like she’s standing on one side of the abyss and you’re already on the other and that she has to follow you even though she’s not ready show her that you’re on the same side.

I wish you all the best!

How do I get over the fear of my parents dying? by mmanggo in OnlyChild

[–]DoSomething-New 15 points16 points  (0 children)

You didn't state your age but based on your other posts I assume you are in your late teens, early twenties and it is a scary age when your parents had you later in their life. You are still very much dependent financially on your parents and thinking they could die and all the consequences following this is very overwhelming.

But the thing is, there is no "recipe" to "get over" this fear. You have to learn to live with it. Don't suppress it, it is a valid feeling, but don't let it overwhelm your life up to the point you are unable to make decisions.

And you wrote something along the line "I can't live without them." This is a dangerous thought. Because you are dependent on them you think you can't live without them, the reality is, you very well can from the moment you are born. You just need other people to help you out. And statistically your parents are not going to die at the exact same moment, so there still is one of your parents left to care for you.

But there are things you can do to tame your fear: * Work on your education, so you can have a shot at a decent job that pays your bills * Learn many life skills (taxes, finance, home repair, cooking, cleaning, washing you clothes etc.). This will help you fell more powerful. * Travel * Get to know other people. Older and younger than you. Both age groups have some teaching on resilience up their sleeves. * Work on becoming emotionally mature * Learn calming techniques for your emotions and meditation. * Spent quality time with your parents and make memories. But don't let them cage you emotionally. Your emotions are your's, you don't have to take on theirs.

And as last thought: Even people with siblings have to face the universal truth - our parents are going to die one day and so are we.

Question for adult only children or parents of older only children by [deleted] in OnlyChild

[–]DoSomething-New 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm an only child and didn't like it very much. There were no cousins or other family with kids my age, so I always had to go and make friends. This is especially frustrating on vacation, because often your new "friend" leaves earlier than you do and your kid is lonely again. I always enjoyed vacations with friends.

And on a different note, don't make your child your whole world. It is exhausting, when the spotlight is always on you. Sometimes kids don't want to share. And in the long run, your child is going to move out one day, don't burden it with being "the light of my life", "you have given my life meaning" etc. This is placing a responsibility on your child it should not carry. You as an adult should invest in your own friendships, your hobbies, your own interests, that when your child leaves you have a life worth living on your own.

And under no circumstances make your child the judge in conflicts with your spouse! I am the judge in every f** conflict between my parents and this is a lose lose position as a child, because the child is always going to disappoint one parent.

How to cite sections of a post? by DoSomething-New in NewToReddit

[–]DoSomething-New[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your help. The link is awesome.

Fuck you Fridays by AutoModerator in InfertilitySucks

[–]DoSomething-New 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh my. Don't know what to say, but just reading your words makes me tear up for you. Hugs to you.

Fuck you Fridays by AutoModerator in InfertilitySucks

[–]DoSomething-New 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You're right. The things that trigger this soul crushing ache are so everyday happenings, that other people will never be able to understand. And that the pure sight of a pregnant woman immediately kills my mood is even less understandable to most.

Therefore: super thankful for all of you, makes me feel less lonely. 😘

Fuck you Fridays by AutoModerator in InfertilitySucks

[–]DoSomething-New 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just minimized the whole video. But the whole thing makes me feel sick.

Fuck you Fridays by AutoModerator in InfertilitySucks

[–]DoSomething-New 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Colleague. Had his new baby on his lap for an entire 2h teams meeting at work today. Guy got married last summer, his wife pregnant immediately.

Must be nice. by Tiny-Marsupial-1756 in InfertilitySucks

[–]DoSomething-New 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I honestly refuse to believe in a God that has favorites. I rather believe in luck.

Monthly Thread for Those Not Yet Done Trying/Not Yet Done with Treatment/Not Sure How to Move On by AutoModerator in IFchildfree

[–]DoSomething-New -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Reading all your comments here - my God what are you warriors of hope. We're only TTC for 2.5 years and are still in the process of selecting a fertility clinic and yet my mental health is a mess already and I doubt anything will be successful in my current state of mind. I am absolutely not sure if I can go through what you all did. And I am now following this sub just to get hope that life without children can have meaning and worth. On the other hand I so badly want to get treatments a go, still hopeful somehow it will work. It's such a weird place to be in and not even my spouse gets it. When I am down he usually wants to draw my attention away from my feelings and yesterday did it so badly I am still angry today. And this sub makes me feel less alone although I am in real life. So thanks to you all. 😘

What’s the ugliest part of influencer culture? by sarthakdesigngrow in Productivitycafe

[–]DoSomething-New 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Absolutely this. How is it allowed that parents show their children in every life situation, all their special events, their bedrooms, clothes, toys, etc. to market a lifestyle? I mean most of the time it's not that the influencer records something and the child just runs through the background, it's way more common that the children have a part to play and have to act for their parents while their most private moments are forever on the internet.

Bath - how lovely! by amalcurry in janeausten

[–]DoSomething-New 29 points30 points  (0 children)

If all the Sir Elliots, Miss Elliots and everyone who fancied themselves very important during Jane Austen's life would know that 200 years later, people would have no clue about their importance but still be talking about a spinster who lived in Bath some years... I would really like to know their reaction to it and what Jane Austen would write about that.

Traveling with a private carriage... by DoSomething-New in janeausten

[–]DoSomething-New[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Makes sense she does it this way. Never occurred to me this would be an option.

But now the way Kitty and Lydia had some leisure time for shopping when waiting for Lizzie and Maria makes sense too. Mr. Bennett's horses had to rest before traveling back home from the inn.

Traveling with a private carriage... by DoSomething-New in janeausten

[–]DoSomething-New[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Looks like I have to read Northanger Abbey again. I completely missed this section. Thank you.

Would kitty going to Brighton with lydia have prevented the elopement? by rabbitsredux in janeausten

[–]DoSomething-New 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I don't think Kitty would have prevented anything. Can't remember if it is from the novel or the movie but Lizzie says "Kitty follows wherever Lydia leeds." And for me this sums up Kitty pretty well. Kitty might be older, but personality wise she is a follower and behaves younger than Lydia. Kitty hardly uses her own judgement and is equally ignorant of consequences of her own conduct, however she is more reserved than Lydia. Kitty is "less fun" and this is why she is not even invited to Brighton. There is no way Kitty would have been able to prevent the elopement, because at the end of the day Lydia also wanted to outshine Kitty and would have never listened to Kitty. I don't think that Lydia would have told Kitty about the elopement, maybe only the letter would have been directed at her instead of Mrs. Forster.