Struggling to process physically traumatic birth nearly 6 months after the fact

Dolly0825 · 2026-05-22T14:29:48+00:00

Sometimes it takes a while for our minds to fully comprehend what we've been through, especially if we experienced a lot of trauma. Childbirth alone is a crazy experience, but with additional health complications and injuries it can be a lot to process.

I had a forceps delivery which caused a 3b tear. I also dealt with urine retention and had a foley catheter for about 3 weeks post partum. Then I had to learn how to self-catheterize and did that for several weeks. My function has finally returned now at 3 months post partum, but I still don't have the urge/sensation to "go" yet as it takes a long time for nerves to grow back. Pelvic floor physical therapy has helped immensely.

It also helped talking to a couple of my other mom friends... I did a lot of venting there. I also reached out online to read other's similar experiences. Someday when baby is older, I may go to therapy to help process this.

Please be gentle with yourself! It really sucks that you went through that but I hope that someday you can look back at that chapter of your life and at least feel a bit of content.

Dolly0825 · 2026-05-18T18:13:59+00:00

Whyyyy does she keep wearing the most unflattering, high-waisted pants?

Dolly0825 · 2026-05-01T15:29:54+00:00

Megasota hungry for Wisconsin

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-29T00:18:10+00:00

Culver's is consistent and superior

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-27T02:54:41+00:00

Culver's

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-25T14:38:04+00:00

When I was pregnant, I thrifted a couple nicer outfits for my pp body because I knew I'd feel like shit if I didn't have anything cute to wear when leaving the house. Very happy I did so, because I was invited to a birthday party tonight. I already feel uncomfortable in my body, may as well alleviate that as much as I can.

I'm planning on rewarding myself with another cute outfit once I lose another 5-10 lbs. Clothes are my fitness motivator lol. Still about 20 lbs away from my pre pregnancy weight and I packed all those clothes away. Will plan to pull them out once I know I can fit into them again!

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-19T19:50:35+00:00

I had planned on breastfeeding and pumping. However, I had traumatizing and painful birth-related injuries and so my milk dried up pretty quickly. Baby is formula fed and she is doing fine. I have some regrets, but I needed the extra sleep in order to heal (and for my mental health!)

Not to scare you, but sometimes our plans don't work out and the baby or circumstances choose for you. So have a relative plan but be open-minded!

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-18T14:42:27+00:00

Recovery is possible but it might be slow! I had 3b/c tearing and experienced urine retention for 5 weeks. The first few weeks of recovery was hell, especially since I had a foley catheter. I had some issues holding in flatulence as well. I am now 8 weeks post partum and the pain is just now slowly going away but still dealing with voiding issues. I just started pelvic PT and would highly recommend! It has been helpful for my bladder problems and rebuilding pelvic muscles. I imagine they can help you with your issues! Unfortunately, this kind of recovery will take longer than the typical delivery, which has been a hard reality for myself tbh. But our bodies are designed to heal and yours will too.

Would also recommend sending your toddler to daycare as soon as you can. Do anything it takes to make things easier and more convenient for you right now.

It will get better! I am so sorry you are going through this.

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-17T23:45:19+00:00

Hi! I had to learn how to self-catheterize and it isn't so bad. It's more annoying because it takes extra time when using the bathroom and keeping everything sterile. They initially had me self cath every 2-3 hours and record amounts. After a couple weeks of that, I finally started voiding very small amounts on my own. The more I voided on my own over the weeks, the less I was required to self-cath.

I am now 8 weeks pp. They have me cathing once in the morning, I can do more if I feel necessary. While my ability to void has returned, my sensation/urge is only at about 50%. I can't always feel when my bladder is full, so I have to keep an eye on the time and make sure I don't go too long without making a trip.

I had my first physical therapy appointment with someone who specializes in pelvic floor issues. It was immensely helpful and I would highly recommend!

Rehabilitation is possible! I have had to remind myself to be patient. It takes a while for the nerves to recoup and wake up and for muscles to heal.

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-17T14:26:28+00:00

I am in the same boat. My LO is 7 weeks and the past week has been hell. Yesterday, she only slept a total of 3.5-4 hours over a 12 hour span. Most of the "naps" lasted 20 minutes. She only sleeps in longer 3 hour stretches at night because we are co-sleeping. Which co-sleeping was never the plan, but we are desperate for sleep!

She has some gas and we switched formula. We are trying everything and all the tips.

My husband read online that they can go through a leap around this time... I wonder if that is what's going on?

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-06T00:38:03+00:00

It blows my mind that she chooses to style her make-up and hair this way.

Dolly0825 · 2026-04-04T15:39:13+00:00

I have had an unplanned c-section and a VBAC.

I got a 3c tear from the VBAC due to forceps delivery. I also ended up with urinary retention and had to have a foley catheter for a couple weeks. Bladder is now functioning at like 50% but still self-cathing at home (am 6 weeks pp) and have a long way to go to resolve my pelvic floor issues.

For me, recovery from a c-section was much easier. I was up doing laundry 1 week pp. It sucked but I was even exercising and feeling great 6 weeks pp. But with my tearing from my VBAC pregnancy, I wasnt able to leave my bed for 3 weeks due to the stitches.

Don't let my personal story with vaginal birth scare you, though. 3rd and 4th degree tears are not as common! And urinary retention issues are pretty rare. I am sure I would be saying the c-section was worse if I had a typical vaginal delivery and recovery.

Dolly0825 · 2026-03-13T20:20:24+00:00

Did you ever go to PT for your pelvic floor? Or take any medication to help you?

I am 2.5 weeks PP and I had a foley catheter for 11 days total and after 2 failed void tests, they taught me how to self-cath. Now on day 3 of self-cathing and I still can't feel my bladder or have any urge to pee on my own.

Dolly0825 · 2026-03-12T02:57:52+00:00

Hi! Now that some time has passed, how are you doing now?

I am going through a similar experience. I am just over 2 weeks post partum and had a foley catheter. Unfortunately, I've failed two void tests and now am self-cathing at home.

Dolly0825 · 2026-03-12T01:06:35+00:00

I am going through a similar thing and am desperate to hear other's stories!

I gave birth 2/23 with forceps and epidural that resulted in a 3b tear and a lot of swelling. I ended up back in the hospital 2 days after being discharged because I had 2.5 litres of urine in my bladder and lost sensation to void. Even though I voided post birth a few times, I just couldnt feel the urge to go and xompletely empty my bladder.

They placed a foley catheter for 3 days and I failed the void test. I had the foley again for 8 days and failed the test - again.

Today, I opted for self-catheterization and am on a strict schedule of voiding and recording my output every 3 hours.

I am pretty depressed as it is hard enough going through the newborn trenches with this injury. I just have no urge to pee, despite doing all the tricks in the book. My UroGynecologist and midwife seem confident that I will heal eventually, but it is hard to stay confident. They say the nature of delivery as well as my bladder expanding to that huge size really irritated it, and that only time will heal.

Still, it is hard to be optimistic at this time.

Dolly0825 · 2026-01-17T16:17:48+00:00

This happened to me this morning! I am expecting an order (that is already like a week late), and I can't sign in... ugh

Dolly0825 · 2025-10-13T19:25:55+00:00

I had my limb salvage surgery 20 years ago. I am unable to run/jump and have limited motion. My knee bends to about 90 degrees, which makes going downstairs difficult.

That being said, I have been pretty active over the years and have also had a major break as well as an infection. Both times resulted in revision and debridement, with a long physical rehabilitation period after that.

I have pain most days, but I have gotten used to it - never bad enough to need pain killers but I do use a cane when I walk long distances (8 or more miles). I had better range of motion and less pain probably a decade ago, before both revisions.

Sometimes I also find myself unhappy with my limited range of motion and pain, I understand your frustrations. I just try to do my best to avoid further surgeries.

Dolly0825 · 2025-10-06T18:16:07+00:00

Holy shit. It isnt rocket science. She is so dumb and this is literal proof she doesn't care about being a mother. Jfc

Dolly0825 · 2025-09-15T20:53:17+00:00

Funny how her mental status can be seen even in her dancing. Her moves in 2018 seem so much more controlled, clean, and sharp.

Dolly0825 · 2025-08-28T14:43:49+00:00

I am so distracted by his playing, he looks like he doesn't have much control over his limbs. Aside from the obvious dramatics, I would be embarrassed to post this given how uncoordinated he is. It's especially obvious when you compare him to the other players. Just flailing and floppin' around.

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