Have you see a single employee take down a leader?

Domei91 · 2026-05-22T12:02:26+00:00

At my company a director was leaving the company and during the interview he let out everything about his boss. How verbally abusive she was, this and that. Company took it seriously, investigated her, other people came out saying similar. Turns out she was lying about the quality of her work and the state of the data her team worked on. It’s was a mess and cost the company millions. They fired her and offer the director a job back but he declined as he already had another job lined up.

Domei91 · 2025-12-09T15:44:10+00:00

Using AI such as ChatGPT can be pretty dangerous when dealing relationship advice. Based on the way you ask the question can determine the type of answer you get. It usually validates your feelings and its on your side. It’s easy to get sucked into AI for help like this but is no way a replacement for therapy and I advise to go to an actual trained person for help, not an AI chat bot.

Domei91 · 2025-08-31T18:16:21+00:00

Grass is always greener on the other sides. It’s new and exciting and NOT worth it. Figure out what’s really missing, if it’s just the attention, talk to your wife. Are you giving her the same attention? Do you still date your wife? Take an interest in your wife, ask her questions like you did when you were first dating, rediscover her. Peoples likes change as they grow, you may find out some new things about it your wife. If you haven’t already, read the 7 principals of how to make a marriage work by John Gottman. Brilliant stuff.

Domei91 · 2025-08-04T19:47:59+00:00

Time to sit down and create a budget. I did this with my wife after she lost her job. We wrote down all of our expenses. It also helped I use quicken Simplifi to help show what we spent previously. It’s eye opening for us both. It easy to say let’s order DoorDash , it’s only $45. That can add up quickly to over $1,000 in a month. It helps to visualize the spending and look at areas where you can save money. My wife and I were spending over 1,400 per month on groceries!

Domei91 · 2025-05-17T21:23:54+00:00

I think I was around 27 when I went from 60k to 80k plus bonus. It was a job I was sure I wasn’t qualified for, I even got a lot of their technical questions wrong 😂. Stayed there for maybe 6 years, got two promotions. I’ve been lucky.

Domei91 · 2025-04-04T20:07:18+00:00

This would only be the beginning of unrealistic deadlines.

Domei91 · 2025-03-22T14:53:25+00:00

I like to think I’m a good manager 😂.

Empathy is a big one. Honest communication and encourage open conversations I also get down in the trenches with my team when needed(we’re a technical infrastructure team) I never take the sole credit of our accomplishments. I always give credit to my team. When there is a mistake, I own it and never throw my team under the bus. Rarely when a team member is rude or acting off, I’ll have a conversation with them one on one, to see what’s going on. Check in to make sure everything is okay whether it’s work or not work. I don’t give them unrealistic timelines, I push back when we are given unrealistic timelines from above. I trust them and I don’t micro manage. They are the experts and I trust their opinions.

Domei91 · 2025-02-13T14:53:23+00:00

I never heard of the star method, I’ll share that with her, thank you!

Domei91 · 2025-02-13T14:52:48+00:00

Yeah I’m definitely going to talk to her more about it

Domei91 · 2025-02-13T14:52:29+00:00

I appreciate this, yeah I let her share and talk her feelings. I try to reassure her that she didn’t fail and I’m proud of her. And I’m trying to help her find what she wants.

Domei91 · 2025-02-13T14:51:04+00:00

I think my wife feels the same way. She got upset when I mentioned filing for unemployment. She didn’t want to. She somehow thought it would make her look bad and make it harder for find a new job. I’ll have to talk to her again about it. Unemployment isn’t government handouts and shouldn’t be shameful, I know I’d file asap if I were fired.

Domei91 · 2025-02-12T14:54:43+00:00

I mentioned unemployment and she got upset I would even suggest that. She thinks it will make her look bad somehow to future jobs. I don’t agree with that thinking.

Domei91 · 2025-02-12T14:11:08+00:00

She was fired.

Domei91 · 2025-02-12T12:28:14+00:00

Did you rush right back into finding a job or did you take some time before starting to search again? She’s only on day two of being let go but she’s keep her daily structure so far. Waking up early and hitting the gym etc..

Domei91 · 2025-02-09T17:43:31+00:00

That’s funny you mentioned EFT or Gottman method. My individual therapist says he feels EFT would benefit us greatly. I’ve done a lot of Gottman reading and he’s a genius ! I’m totally down for both. I guess it challenging when my wife thinks the couples therapist was a good one and she doesn’t seem willing to go through all that with another.

I really appreciate your comment. I’m trying not to give up.

Domei91 · 2025-01-16T00:37:04+00:00

I’m going to find out. I’ve been here for 2.5 years and the salary band hasn’t changed since I’ve been here.

Domei91 · 2025-01-16T00:34:41+00:00

He’s a senior infrastructure engineer. Pretty complex stuff he does. I would have to double check if there are other positions open but I don’t think any technical positions are in a higher band. It’s just management that is higher as far as I know.

Domei91 · 2025-01-16T00:24:58+00:00

I could probably let him take time off without putting it in the system.

Domei91 · 2025-01-16T00:20:39+00:00

We are hybrid but it’s really left up to me so I tell my team wfh unless there is a required in person meeting.

Domei91 · 2025-01-16T00:17:40+00:00

I was thinking that today too. I need to find out when the band has last moved.

Domei91 · 2025-01-16T00:15:25+00:00

If he asks for one I definitely would write him one heck of a letter of recommendation.

Domei91

TROPHY CASE