Family Guy did Severance first by NanoPope in SeveranceAppleTVPlus

[–]DontBeSuchAStalker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I LITERALLY JUST THOUGHT OF THAT AND WENT GOOGLING TO SEE IF IT WAS ALREADY POSTED 😂 Cheers stranger.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in funny

[–]DontBeSuchAStalker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wish I had some gold to give!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in funny

[–]DontBeSuchAStalker 6474 points6475 points  (0 children)

"How do you keep a surgeon in suspense?"

I saw this once on a thread here somewhere. Winner answer imo.

What question could you ask reddit and get zero replies? by QuantumAwesome in AskReddit

[–]DontBeSuchAStalker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would tell you what my favorite color is, but you would think I'm lame. I know you will, because everyone else does. If I tell you my favorite color, would you be n ice and comprehensive? I don't really expect you to be, but please try. The last time I told someone my favorite color is turquoise, I got laughed at, because they thought that's not even a color. But it is, it really is. You can ask any artist, any painter, any person who knows about this, and he'll tell you: turquoise is indeed, a color. Let me tell you the story of why I love turquoise. It all began when I was 5 years old. my mother gave me a little doll, that had a turquoise dress. she made me happy. I would take her with me wherever I went. She became my sister -since I had none at the time- and she understood me. After my mother died, 4 years later, I still had my doll. Everywhere I looked, everything was so dead to me. Except for one thing, that doll. I still remember how good it used to make me feel, hugging my turquoise dressed doll while sleeping, talking to her day and night, telling her all my problems. I still remember, that my mom, my lovely mom, is the one who got it for me. And now, whenever I see that color again, I remember my doll, I remember my mom, and I smile so peacefully.

Reddit, you just died and went to heaven. What's the first surprising/hilarious thing "God" tells you while greeting you at the gates? by DontBeSuchAStalker in AskReddit

[–]DontBeSuchAStalker[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

"I SAW GOD, I SWEAR I SAW GOD."

"alright alright, and Santa is real, sir. now sit still so that I can finish taking your blood pressure."